Greek wedding service details please

[GreekWeddingWithBling]

I'm not greek, but getting married in the greek church. DP isn't that religious and is a man so frankly, is clueless about the ceremony. I've got the basics down from books - the rings, the crowns, the walking around the altar, the candles - but what I don't know is how much flexibility there is.

Eg, I know you start at the front of the church. My dad will be devastated if he can't walk down the aisle with me? Can we work that in?

What about readings? Can someone else do them? Does it have to be chanted by the priest or can someone we care about do them like in an Anglican service?

Are there going to be hymns? Or not?

Any other hints and tips gratefully appreciated. I've got shoulders on my dress as no one could tell me if I needed that or not so I decided to err on the side of caution.

TIA

Bumping for help please.

Is it a Greek church in Greece or in another country? Other countries tend to tie their customs into the ceremony.
Your Father will walk you down the aisle (or rather to the front of the Church where the groom waits) this is standard in Greek weddings. He will in theory be 'giving you away' as he will hand you over to your husband
The readings will be done by the preist and there are no hymns.
You absolutely 100% do NOT need shoulders on your dress contrary to popular belief most Greek churches and priests are very relaxed!

Let me know if you want any more info!

It's in another country - hence I'm hoping they'll be a bit more flexible (sadly though, DP's family, who are supposedly members of this church, cannot answer a signle question!).

My father will want to walk me down the aisle so I'm hoping that the groom can wait at the front as is traditional in SA weddings. Especially as frankly, outside the church there isn't much space!

No hymns? Excellent for me. My mother of course is sniffing about it not being a "proper" wedding [but then, my mother wants the order of service to include a copy of her family tree and to be made up of about 17 pieces of paper!].

I heard a rumour the priest will attend the reception with his entire family? In this case, his wife and five children, is that true? Or is it just his wife and him?

tbh i am not sure, the way things are in Greece is very different to the way things are in Greek communities in other countries.
While Greece has moved forward very quickly, The Greeks that emigrated during the 40's/50's to the US, Australia, SA etc tend to stick to the customs and traditions of those times.

I would meet the priest and ask him, i am sure that he will be able to help you with anything and may be able to incorporate your wishes into the service. Greek weddings are beautiful and the rice throwing at the end is particularly fun!

Regarding the priest, i have never heard of a priest attending the wedding party (except maybe village weddings where the priest is known to the family) but again this may be different in SA!

tbh i am not sure, the way things are in Greece is very different to the way things are in Greek communities in other countries.
While Greece has moved forward very quickly, The Greeks that emigrated during the 40's/50's to the US, Australia, SA etc tend to stick to the customs and traditions of those times.

I would meet the priest and ask him, i am sure that he will be able to help you with anything and may be able to incorporate your wishes into the service. Greek weddings are beautiful and the rice throwing at the end is particularly fun!

Regarding the priest, i have never heard of a priest attending the wedding party (except maybe village weddings where the priest is known to the family) but again this may be different in SA!

Thanks!
The problem is that the priest refuses to talk to us until we arrive in SA. He won't even make an appointment with us until we arrive. And I'm feeling quite stressed and unhappy about it. It feels like no one is listening to me at all - not the priest, or DP's family etc.

I should get over it. I know.

I think you've hit the nail on the head with your comment about keeping the customs and traditions of earlier times for those who emigrate. And in my case, we're having this problem on both sides of the family - his family are still convinced everything is the same as when they came to SA 40 years ago and my mother refuses to believe that certain traditions have changed and are unnecessary. So for example, the fact that not all religious services are legal is absolutely astonishing to her. But that's because 40 years ago when she got married you had three choices - catholic, anglican or jewis. And that was it.

So the priest coming to the reception with all his kids, is DP's dad's theory.

I hate this. I went with the greek service because I thought it would make people happy and be a beautiful service but it's freaking me out.

And now DP is annoyed because when I try to talk to him about this stuff he either takes it as a complaint against his family - which I guess it is! - or a complaint about getting married in the greek church.

don't people throw sugared almonds when they dance round 3 times?

They throw rice, not almonds - that would hurt like hell! you give the sugared almonds to each guest as a going home gift.

FWIW I didn't have a clue what I was doing when we got to the church, and i am the greek one so dh was completely clueless, but basically the priest just pointed us in the right direction and told us what to do as we went along. there is a lot of stuff to think about and it is very different to a traditional non-Greek church service, so i would rely on the priest to guide you.

It is a pretty basic principle I think that your dad hands you over to the groom at the door, and the priest then leads you both in - so don't assume they will change that for a tradit walk down the aisle.

don't know but RELAX (a little), I'm sure it will be nice and they'll walk you through and explain the meaning of what you're doing when you're actually there.

I googled youtube greek wedding and this blog came up:

greekweddings.wordpress.com/category/youtube

if the link didn't work, you'd find it if you googled as I did. There are some videos and discussions on throwing rice, going in with the groom, breaking bread and other traditions I had never known about before.

The village I lived in used to throw sugared almonds as well as rice when they go round 3 times.

the rice signifying happiness and prosperity the almonds fertility and the sugar the sweet memory of the occasion.

Thanks everyone.
It's not that I'm concerned it won't be nice - I think the service sounds lovely and I'm looking forward to it. What I am finding frustrating is not knowing what flexibility there is. And, while I am looking forward to the service as it is, I don't think it's unreasonable for my dad to assume he'll be walking me down the aisle. it's one of those basic father things [if you're not greek] and if he can't do it, I'd like to start managing his expectations now.

I know. I read on that site that the groom at the door of the church thing isn't always adhered to in Australian Greek weddings so maybe there is some flexibility. Hope so. Would be a shame to disappoint your dad