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Parties/celebrations

Whether you're planning a birthday or a hen do, you'll find plenty of ideas for your celebration on our Party forum.

Social venue that isn’t our house

11 replies

CherrySocks · 21/08/2024 22:49

TLDR: What do you do if your home is scruffy and not spacious but you want to get a group of people together in a nice sociable hospitable way?

Sorry this is long and first world problem etc but it is driving me mad so maybe someone can help.

I really wish I could invite people to a social gathering – eg a family party/meet-up or a group of friends – I find it very frustrating that I can’t do this - but it seems impossible – I can’t get our house to look presentable – it’s an old terraced house and there is only room for one sofa in the main living room and we have mismatched furniture and I can’t get everything to look neat and modern – everything seems scruffy – we have several cats and it’s ages since we decorated and we aren’t good at DIY etc etc – so I am trying to think of alternatives that aren’t too weird.

  • Move house – bit drastic but I’m imagining a house with space for socialising that looks modern and presentable. Problems – takes too long to buy and sell, costs money, and the location of our current house has so many pluses (near shops, near transport, near range of facilities etc) that it’s difficult to find somewhere in our budget that isn’t in a worse location. (We don’t have a car.)
  • Invite people to a restaurant. Have done this several times before with certain cohesive family groups. Problems – there isn’t usually room to mill about and I want to introduce various people to one another – different bits of family who haven’t met before; also there’s the paying awkwardness : if you invite people to a restaurant do you pay for everything they order (£££) or do you expect them to pay for their own meals in which case I won’t feel like I am being hospitable at all.
  • Hire a room in a restaurant/hotel – have hired rooms in hotel type venues before but usually for a particular occasion like someone’s big birthday or once my parents’ anniversary – can control catering costs this way but it seems weird to do it without an occasion to celebrate and I can’t think of anything coming up that would bring together the right group of people (eg wouldn’t invite in-laws of one grown up child to the birthday of another grown up child and they would want to invite their own friends).
  • Rent an Airbnb or a ‘holiday’ cottage – but would need to be in London really as most people live in or around London and we need to be able to get there easily ourselves – and isn’t it weird to have a kind of casual party in someone else’s property – plus would have to get separate catering in.

What do other people do if your home is scruffy and not spacious?
I just want to be sociable and hospitable but not embarrassed about all the scruffiness.

OP posts:
ThursdayTomorrow · 21/08/2024 22:51

Nice village hall.

FusionChefGeoff · 21/08/2024 22:52

Very weather dependent unfortunately but you could host a fancy picnic in a park?

longestlurkerever · 21/08/2024 22:57

I was going to say village hall or urban equivalent but a picnic might also work? Or hire somewhere random like a boat? I don't think you need an occasion or only a very ordinary one - birthday or anniversary or end of exams or whatever- just say that you really want an excuse ti get everyone together. I'd come, sounds lovely. Equally I bet a party at your gaff would be great. Warm and welcoming.

PandaG · 21/08/2024 22:58

Invite them to your home anyway?

Do you have a garden? Borrow gazebos and have a garden party - I catered 40 for afternoon tea in the garden and towards 50 for an evening party for my 50th birthday, we borrowed a load of garden/camping furniture from friends and neighbours, baked lots for the afternoon and cooked jacket potatoes in the next door neighbours oven and made a variety of curry/chilli/etc toppings with salads, fruit salad, meringues straws and cream etc (everything bar my birthday cake was gf as several gf guests... There was a gf cake too). Was a fair bit of effort, but adult DC helped, and a brilliant day.

WashableVelvet · 21/08/2024 23:00

We live in a scruffy old terrace with a one-sofa living room and love having people round - and they love to come!

  • in summer: do it in the garden. We bought a cheap folding catering table to put food and drink on as our normal dinner table not big enough. Tablecloth on top. Bunting along the fence. Looks very festive. The catering table lives behind the sofa the rest of the year.
  • in winter: evening, mood lighting, candles, good music on, bung some of the usual clutter upstairs in our bedroom. Atmospheric and cosy.
  • we buy actual champagne (from lidl) instead of Prosecco, no one ever thought badly about the fanciness of a house in which they are served champagne 😂
  • for bigger dos, almost all our local churches rent out their hall quite cheaply. Just as good for family gatherings as for kids’ bday parties.
longestlurkerever · 21/08/2024 23:01

Places like cricket clubs and tennis clubs can generally be hired. Might be a bit pricey but cheaper than moving house!

CherrySocks · 22/08/2024 12:34

Thanks for the ideas. No nice village hall unfortunately - London suburb, only has characterless church/civic halls. Garden small, over grown, would mean coming through house and using bathroom and wet weather plan would be the house (see original problem!). Random boat - did look into Golden Hinde as quirky venue but disabled accessibility an issue. Park - has dogs in and football etc. Did discover a nice local tucked away pub online which does private parties but the food reviews are quite mixed (as in some are OK/good and some very bad). Would welcome other ideas for small and quirky venues? Or anyone want to lend me their lovely spacious modern house?! 😂 😂😂

OP posts:
longestlurkerever · 22/08/2024 13:29

Whereabouts in London? Near me I can think of cricket club, tennis club, community centre that used to be a station, cafe in the woods, pub rooms, school halls, charity hall thing. Halls4hire is a useful website. But I bet your house is fine really. Modern isn't everyone's aesthetic. You could always invest your venue budget in some decor

Apileofballyhoo · 22/08/2024 14:05

Maybe look at places that advertise for small weddings?

longdistanceclaraclara · 22/08/2024 16:08

A room in a pub, or an area in a pub?

Church hall?

WashableVelvet · 22/08/2024 20:15

There’s also a website called Sharesy for community venues of various kinds. But tbh if you find them all soulless, and hate the idea of people even walking through your house to the garden, then it sounds like you won’t be satisfied with anywhere that isn’t a ready-decorated venue.

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