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Parties/celebrations

Whether you're planning a birthday or a hen do, you'll find plenty of ideas for your celebration on our Party forum.

Is this okay?

6 replies

soanxious · 10/12/2007 14:22

First of all I have got to explain that I am probably the most anxious person ever
....so please bear with me!

For DD2's birthday party I have booked a party which is £9 per child. It's where she wanted to go so I said she could invite her two sisters and 3 little ones from pre-school.

So, she invites 5. She comes home saying she's asked them so I felt obliged to send them an invite.

That's fine. A bit more expensive than I was anticipating but who's to say they will all come anyway. One of the main reasons I wasn't inviting many was the cost, but then also because she doesn't really have any friends at pre-school yet, and also because the party is 30 miles away from home.

Now two of the parents of children who have been invited have asked if they can bring their other child. They have offered to pay the money. I said it was okay and I would pay, but they said they insist. Do I take it? I can't really afford not to but I don't want to seem mean!

Also, a good friend of mine has two children (DD2 isn't great mates with them but DD1 is and they usually come to both DD's parties). I haven't been able to ask her children as it would make it far too expensive (this is the first year DD2 has got her own friends though). Now I'm scared to tell her about party incase she's offended. BTW, this friend doesn't invite mine to her DD2's parties (her DD1 doesn't have them), but she does give me a lot of finished with clothes, toys etc.

I feel I have a moral dilemma, please help wise mumsnetters before I have another anxiety melt-down and cancel the whole thing!

OP posts:
captainmummy · 10/12/2007 20:52

God it's so easy to be dragged into this maelstrom of hurt-feelings/money-go-round. The mum's who have asked if other dc can come...of course they should pay for their other kids.
Don't really know what to do abouyt your 'best friend' thing, I think I would not invite her dc, and try to keep quiet about it. But if there is a slightest chance that she will find out, then you should come clean, admit that it's expensive and that your dd will be bringing only her own friends. She'll just have to lump it.

Any help??

BettySpaghetti · 10/12/2007 20:56

The Mums of the "extras" should pay -no question of that.

Re: other friend and her children, could you not have a simple tea party or something that you can invite them to.

mollymawk · 10/12/2007 21:01

One part of your qu is easy to answer - the parents of the "extra" children have offered to pay so it will be fine to accept. If I were them I would be very happy with this as I would then feel less guilty about "gatecrashing". And they only have to pay for one child each whereas you would have to pay for all of them.
Second part - hmmm, not sure. What everyone else said!

soanxious · 11/12/2007 10:27

Thanks everyone!

I think I will accept the other parents paying for the extra children.

I came clean with my friend about the party, explained that it was the first time she was inviting her little pre-school friends and that she had invited more than I had anticipated and it was getting expensive. She agreed saying that this year she was just taking two of her DD2's friends out for a meal.....phew!!

I then said the four children should get together to play a couple of days after the birthday.

OP posts:
captainmummy · 11/12/2007 14:24

Are youchanging your name to SoRelieved now? Or are yuo saving the anxiety up for the party???? Good luck!

soanxious · 11/12/2007 17:08

lol captainmummy.

No, I am just anxious in general!

My DH always starts things off with 'Now, I know how you like to worry.........'

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