Help! Do I have to invite the whole class?!

[babyblueiloveyou]

My ds1 started reception last week and his birthday is early October. Not sure exactly what we're doing for his party but will probably involve entertainer or bouncy castle/soft play centre. Considering I don't know at this point who his 'friends'/'children he plays most with are' - how do I know who to invite? I will probably speak to his teacher once he's settled in a bit more but don't want to make a 'faux pas' by upsetting anyone this early in the term! Should also say can't really afford to invite the WHOLE class (obviously wouldn't all come but can't take the chance!)

No-one in DS1's class invites the whole class to their party, just their friends. Just make sure you hand out invitations discreetly so those not invited don't get upset. Better still, post them.

its my dds birthdya in 3 weeks and what i have done is told her she can ask 3 friends and we will got to the cinema nad perhaps lunc afterwards

then when she has decided what 2/3 friends i am going to approach the parents and ask them

Don't know. Obviously you don't have to invite the whole class, but I can see your problem - who then do you invite? Is it possible to invite just boys? Interested to see what other say, as both my children have Autumn birthdays.

At that age it is more done to invite everyone . dd has just turned 6 and invited all her class plus a few (19 in all) but her firends turning 7 are starting to be more selective. Agree that if you decide to be selective don't give out invitations at school.

Thanks everyone. It sounds like I either have to risk upsetting some (I would be discreet tho) or bite the bullet and invite all. On the other hand inviting everyone would be a good introduction for all the parents who don't know each other and I think I can safely assume that not everyone invited would be able to make it. Can't afford soft play centre for whole class but would entertainer at the house be ok for 4/5 year olds?
Madame P - my ds2 also has a 'first term birthday' - but at least I'll know the etiquette by the time it's his turn! I did well with ds3 - he's August (not so good from a starting school point of view tho - poor lamb!)

at this age i tend to do all boys. i realise they all play together but it seemed to be a good way to cut numbers in half without upsetting anyone.

My DS's birthday is today. He is still at nursery so haven't had the school issue as yet. But did briefly think about next year. I think I will invite all the boys but not the girls, so hopefully have an OK number.

I'm in a similar situation, although my DS1 was in the school nursery so we've invited his friends who have gone up from nursery plus a handful of new children based on names he had come home talking about plus the DSs/DDs of mums who I think I would like to become friends with. I gave one mum an invite today, who looked like someone I'd like to get to know, and she was so touched that her DS (who didn't know any other chidren when he started reception) had made a friend.

DH feels sorry for all those children we don't invite but, with lots of other family members/outside school friends to invite we couldn't possibly invite the whole class.
I hope this helps.