This is a bit rude isn't it?

[The2Ateam]

Currently at the birthday party of my 8yr old DDs school friend. I work full time so, only know a few of the mums, I haven't met this one before.

Anyway, she said hello when we arrived and then has sat with her back to me the whole time. Not spoken once... Rude much?

Why have you stayed at the party?

I think she hadn't expected you to stay. Ive taken dd to parties where it was too far to go home & back so ive sat in morrisons cafe or the local garden centre etc instead.

Suburban that's harsh.

Yes of course everyone is different but if all your family and friends are happily outgoing people and you have never met anyone who admits to social anxiety how would you know?

For example - I have difficulties with locks (really I do) locking/unlocking doors are hard for me. I suspect this isn't a problem most people have.

If you* consider locks easy you might be gob smacked that anyone^ could find it tricky.

I think she hadn't expected you to stay. Ive taken dd to parties where it was too far to go home & back so ive sat in morrisons cafe or the local garden centre etc instead.

^This is what I would do as well

Surburban, I'm going to ignore your bitchy little comment. Whatever.

As for going somewhere else - party is in a hall on a farm in Kent. No where around to go.

Why are people talking about social anxiety or inability of the woman to talk? Far more likely is she didn't want to. She was sitting talking to someone else, and didn't choose to instead start talking to someone she doesn't know and didn't expect to be there anyway.

Only on MN would it be rude to not break off talking to your friend to instead make small talk with a stranger, and if you don't you must have a social anxiety!

I don't think it's harsh, herewego.

The OP expects people to believe she had no idea people weren't like her and manages to squeeze in a stealth boast about her social skills at the same time. Why wouldn't anyone question it?

She does sound rude ..nowt as queer as folk

As for going somewhere else - party is in a hall on a farm in Kent. No where around to go.

So where are the other parents then? And have you just been sat for the duration of this party on your phone?

My social skills are amazing Surburban. They include actually talking to people, even parents who come to my children's party's. I mainly avoid being a total bitch on MN though, but am making an exception for you sweetheart.

I don't think she's rude. The children are 8 and at that age parents are expected to drop and run. The mum is hosting the children, not adults. And if she's chatting to her sister it's possible that she doesn't even realise you've stayed.

Yes, we can all see how amazing your social skills are, OP.

This thread is why I don't want parents staying at my DCs parties - they are much harder work than the children.

Unless you got the bus there id be sitting in the car. The party is for kids not parents.

I think it's probably just thrown her having an adult stay at an 8 year old's party. Some people are go-with-the-changes-people, others not so much. It's not you. I imagine she'd find it weird if anyone had stayed.

My social skills are amazing Surburban. They include actually talking to people

Even the ones that don't want to talk to you, it seems. Amazing skills altogether.

Yes, we got the bus there.

Either way, I'm still of the opinion it is rude to totally ignore the parent of your child's friend, I wouldn't do it, but I survived and DD had a great time. Thanks to those you who kept me company.
Tigger and Surburban, see you at a kids part soon. kisses to you both. Lol xx

She didn't totally ignore you though, did she? She said hello to you. You still haven't said exactly what you think she should have done?
You seem very bothered that she didn't talk to you even though you say you didn't want to talk to her. Doesn't quite make sense.

You were an uninvited, unwanted and unexpected guest who didn't have the manners to check if it would be OK to stay when you accepted your daughter's invite assuming you did RSVP in the first place, as so many people don't seem to bother these days so I would say you were the rude one.

I find my kids parties very stressful and I admit that my heart sank when one parent stayed at DD's last birthday party. I didn't object, but found the extra stress of making small talk with someone I didn't really know, while keeping an eye on the party, really put me on the edge. I did talk to her (she was lovely) but I don't think it's especially rude not to. She acknowledged you and then left you to your own devices. That seems perfectly reasonable to me.

Oh shut up Craziest, what an utterly stupid thing to say. Hahahahah! Seriously are you that sad and bored that you would write that post, attacking me for staying at an 8-year olds party? How funny you are!!!

She might not see her sister very often and was looking forward to catching up with her. You enjoyed the time on your own, didn't make the effort yourself so everyone's happy, aren't they?

I was happy Dame, mearly pointing out what I found to be rude. I still think it is.

I'd've given her the benefit of the doubt. She could be shy or stressed out beyond belief... I'm never good in those situations and I know I might come across as rude when I really don't mean to