Inviation to a 4 yo's party states "No Presents". Advice?

[Judd]

Hiya,
Just wanted to run this past you. My DD and DS have been invited to a party this coming weekend in the church hall - running around, toys and a bouncy castle. The invitation clearly states that no presents are to be bought for the birthday girl - do I:-
A) comply and just send a card
B) send a DD-crafted card written by her and covered in glitter, ribbon etc.
C) send a present but err on the educational side (Orchard Toys maybe) rather than frivolity
D) Something else along the charity donation lines. (feel this may be more for her parents' benefit though, as the little girl will not understand).
E) Buy something hair-clippy which would be girly yet practical.
Any thoughts gratefully received!

marymillington - why a nightmare?

Some children had class parties and got lots of presents (that they prob didn't need). Some children didn't have class parties but would go to parties and bring a gift.

This seemed like a much fairer system. It's cheaper for everyone. No dashing about trying to find something halfway decent that isn't a waste of money. And the child gets a decent present that doesn't end up in the bin in a day or two.

We are in an International school and there would be about 10/12 diff nationalities in DS class. Everyone welcomed the idea.

seems a bit regulated and impersonal i suppose

i dislike being controlled by other parents dicating what i shoudl or shoudlnt do fgs

I suppose it is a bit but the alternative was worse!!!!

Seems to be going OK though.

of coruse they dont NEED them

they are toys

my kids dont NEED a huge smoby kitchen

btu they've bloody got one now

We could certainly have lived without the many "Fashion studios" and "Sleepover kits" and "Makeover sets" my 5yo dd2 was given at her last party.

home made card.

arf
yes god these bladry parents
just ban parties fgs
no mroe winging abotu any FUN your kdis may have
all cath kidston and organic playdoh

LOL Enid!!!

And the workbench was on my list of flop Xmas presents!!!!

oh shut yer teeth fishface
stop making judgements about people who dont like tat for presents or i'll forever envisage you as ricki lake in city shorts and a hairband

I am taking ds1 to a party tomorrow, and we have been asked to give a cash gift of up to £2, half of which goes towards oxfam goat and half to child to buy something nice.
A good compromise I guess? Not sure what ds1 will think about it, as he has got used to giving presents at these things and seems to enjoy that.
Nice to teach a child to want to do something for others though, don't you think?

Could you take a plate of homemade cakes as a contribution to the party food and tie with ribbon to make it look like a pressie to the little girl? That with a big homemade card would be a good compromise maybe?

I would certainly respect parents wishes. I'd really like to say 'no presents' for my dds next parties but wouldn't want to offend or seem 'up myself' as some of these posts might indicate to be some parents' responses. Also I do feel it's not really my place to make this decision for my dds. While dds are still young I subtly siphon off some presents (e.g. ones they've already got or I know they won't use or don't need) and recycle them to other kids for presents or charity. That way everyone wins. When they get older I might try and negotiate with them e.g. ask for no presents from school friends but get special one from M & D and close family.

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