Should I assume they are/aren't coming?

[Mishy1234]

DS1 has a party soon, to which 9 children were invited. They are all from his nursery and the invites were handed out by the staff at pick up time. I know very few of the parents.

7 replied by the RSVP date. I asked the staff to remind the remaining 2 to let me know if they can make it. That was a couple of days ago.

The absolute max the venue can take is 10 (inc DS), so we were very restricted on numbers. There are a couple of children DS would like to invite if he could, but I'm not sure if that is too much of a risk just in case the 2 who haven't replied turn up anyway.

I can ask the nursery to remind them again, but don't want to be pushy. Should I just leave the spaces free just in case?

I think I'd write a note and ask the nursery staff to hand it over at pick up - or point the two parents/carers out so you can talk to them yourself.

Maybe just saying sorry, don't mean to hassle, but really need to know if the child is coming, because if they can't, then you can give their place to another child, rather than have it empty.

This is always a tricky one. I personally would think, 'stuff it if you haven't replied, your place has been taken' but they may have replied and you haven't got it or the nursery 'forgot' to pass on message, then what happens if they turn up. As the RSVP date has gone and no answer I would assume they can't come (v. cheeky of them not to decline still though) and invite two other DC. If they do turn up however then just say you hadn't had their reply and their place has been filled - chances are you won't see these parents again if you haven't so far at the nursery; may teach them a lesson in responding I'm harsh, though.

Thanks for the advice.

The problem has been halved as one person replied this morning. Hopefully the other will over the weekend.

I just feel bad as I would have like to invite everyone, but space at the venue wouldn't allow that. I would follow your advec LadyInPink if I had the balls! I would feel terrible for the child though if I had to turn them away.

That is good news Mishy, hopefully you'll hear about the other DC very soon. It would take a very strong person to actually turn away a little one, you're right, but sometimes it is the only way they'll learn (the parents that is).

Just heard that the last child is coming! It's a huge relief, so now I'll have to find something else to stress over. No issues there. I'm finding this more stressful than organising our wedding!

Thanks for the advice guys. This party thing is a real minefield.