theatre party for a 4 year old

[herecomesthsun]

I am thinking of taking my DS to a theatre production of 1 of his favourite books next year. It would make for a great party theme and I was thinking if it is a nice summer day, we could go for a picnic in the park before or after (there is a park near the theatre).

I can see some problems though

1. if it is a wet day, I am wondering whether the theatre would let little children have snacks and cake in the theatre bar. The theatre restaurant is closed that day, so they would not be losing business. I did once have a birthday party for my (very ill) mum at the National in London in their big open foyer but it might be different in a small theatre. I have called theatre to check with them but they didn't get back to me.

1. I would need to ask his friends/ their families some months in advance to book the seats. The cost is £8 each, so it would compare quite well to a play barn party and would be more interesting for the little ones. However, do I offer to pay for parents and siblings? And if not, how do I negotiate that diplomatically? I think it would be very difficult to wrangle more than a couple of 4 year olds in a theatre without having more hands on deck.

1. Also, suppose the families later decide they want to go away (this would be around half term at a time of multiple bank holidays, with which we are well endowed next year). This could create a bit of awkwardness, I can see.

1. This show is likely to get booked up in advance, so adding more people on at a later stage might be hard. However, in the space of 6 months or so, I can see that DS might conceivbly change his idea of who his best friends are.

1. I could just invite one or 2 friends, but DS is very sociable and I think would love to have a rather larger group. He is the eldest (DC2 due Feb) and I do not have much experience of negotiating this sort of thing, so advice very welcome!

Sorry, the idea was that this would be for a 4th birthday party, I didn't make that clear did I?

To be honest I think it is a huge palaver for a four year old. I would be a bit at committing to something months ahead and to having to attend and fret about behaviour for a four year old.

If it were me I would buy as many tickets as I could afford equally divided between one parent one child and invite who you want to a month before.

So five children tickets, five adults tickets and then see who can come nearer the time.

Being invited to a theatre party and then being asked to pay for my own ticket would irritate me a bit tbh. I would ask if I could drop her with you in the foyer which would cause you problems I expect.
If we were best friends and our dc were best friends it would be different. But to be one of a large number and still expected to committ months ahead and buy my own ticket would irritate me.

So, in short, decide on your maximum number now bit in terms of those who are likely to come and those you really want there. Buy the tickets. Worry about everything else a month before.

But don't have a party in a play barn

I sound more irritated than I meant to

God, I'm really torn. I love children's theatre and am actually a trustee of a children's theatre company so, of course the idea of a birthday party at a show SOUNDS fab.
But...
I have a four year old, in fact I gave her a party on Monday and to be honest, letting DC and a bunch of friends run riot at the park/ garden/ venue of choice would be much easier than trying to corral children in a theatre. They will all be far too excited, won't take it in properly, and to be honest, won't enjoy it as much as mayhem + tea.

Could you take DC as a special birthday treat just with you and maybe one special friend as well as a party?

I think you also need to think carefully if his friends are the sort of children who will sit nicely in a theatre. If he is turning four I imagine some of his friends will be younger and some children are not that great at sitting still for any length of time.
Also I would want parents to be there, and if it was a party I wouldn't want to pay personally.
I would be inclined to either just invite 1 or possibly two friends and one parent and do something else for a party.

That's okay Pag. Last birthday was Ds's first ever birthday party to which we tried to invite a collection of friends from playgroup etc. We booked a beach hut and planned a pirate party on the beach. The bad weather opt out was the beach cafe. It was a howling storm although a heat wave had been predicted a week before. The kids loved being fed hot chocolate and chips (we offered to buy everyone brunch but most of the mums declined, I think they didn't want to impose, it was a bit more awkward than I had anticipated) and we had pass the pirate parcel with DH playing sea shanties on his recorder, which sort of sounded quite atmospheric with the wind rustling outside. The pirate brownie cake went down fairly well though...

I thought maybe a different sort of event with a more dependable inside bit might be an idea ths year.

I can see that the soft play thing would be a lot more straight forward though.

I would rather not have a party at home with a 3 month old I think.

Maybe I should mention it is the Gruffalo, which I think would appeal to lots of them. Another alternative I guess would be to ask the preschool whether they would consider organising a trip out (which would be at reduced rates for a group) as a differnt sort of outing.

Personally it is the sort of thing I would love DS to get to see and would want to take him anyway so I might not mind paying to come along as well, but I can see that might be a bit unusual. I can also imagine that some parents we know might be a bit embarrassed at having their tickets paid for.

The problem with planning to run amok in a park is what do you do if the weather turns into a blizzard on the day?

Another alternative would be to go to a local countryside centre which would do a fab party. It would prob cost around £200 given that i would have to do the food as well which seems a lot for a 4 year old. However it did occur to me that I could share the cost with another mum and have a joint party possibly as there are other birthdays around that time and I know of at least 1 mum who might just conceivably be interested. £100 towards a really good joint party that would benefit a very worthwhile cause in part and which the children would enjoy and hopefully appreciate.

I did like the theatre birthday party idea though, because well I rather like theatre, (and it would be very easy to theme the party to the show.)

You could offer to organise a theatre trip with the preschool, maybe get a coach, if you don't live in the same town as the theatre, and do a raffle on there for preschool funds. Then hire a local hall and have a gruffalo party for all his friends?

how would the raffle fit in (don't quite get that bit)?

I think you're overthinking this. Having just been to 8 ! four year old birthday parties, all they really want is 45mins - an hour of running around games followed by food and cake, DONE. Don't make it too long, too complicated or expensive, please!

Fwiw if my CDs best friend had wanted to do a theatre party I would have loved it but at age 4 , with the mixed bag of sitting and listening skills, I would just be wary of an invitation where I hardly know the child or mum.

Do a theatre trip. It sounds lovely. But just for a couple of friends - regardless of how sociable he is. Just get as many children as you can afford to have with a parent to take them to the loo or help them when they get scared or drop their ice cream on the floor.

For the absence of doubt, I would shoot myself rather than do a play barn party.

Dd often has parties at home, even with a sibling who needs constant care. I pay an entertainer. Easy. At age four she had Winnie the pooh.

Another option was at my health club where she had themed games which she and her friends loved.

The atmospheric thing sounds lovely. But at age 4 they still need to pee, argue and you can't rely on the weather.

Even two years later you can rely on most of them not to need to pee mid performance and they won't need a parent there unless you want one.

If you don't want a party at home because you will have to have a 4 month old there, won't the 4 month old have to go to the theatre.

The play says 3+ and 0-12 months - Babies are permitted on laps but a free entry ticket must be issued for fire safety reasons - please ask the Box Office.

I wasn't doubting that a baby can go. I just don't u derstand why having a party at home is too difficult because of a 4 month old. But a theatre trip and a picnic in the park afterwards, with a 4 month old, is not a problem.

I think we are misunderstanding each other. Do it by all means. I have just done two previous four year old parties, and five and six etc etc and I was just giving you my views. But I am sure theatre will be great.

OP, why not do as pagwatch suggested? Buy 5 adult and 5 child tickets (or as many as you can afford) and then invite 4 (as many as you can afford) best friends nearer the time? That solves the problem of people making holiday plans or feeling awkward at making parents pay.

They will all LOVE it and I wouldn't worry about them not being able to concentrate - it is aimed specifically at that age group.

Personally, I wouldn't ask the theatre about eating snacks inside if it rains as they may say no in advance, but I doubt they'd force a happy bunch of 4 year olds to eat their picnic in the rain!

A party isn't better because the whole class is invited. I know I will risk offending others when DD1 has her 5th birthday as I will only allow a maximum of 15 kids no matter where it is held. We all hate the fact that class sizes are so big at 30 so it puzzles me why parents choose to have parties for that number.

It's such a good idea I might steal it if there are any good shows on when it's DDs birthday!