Party Bags?

[FGM]

I threw a party for my 4yo DD1 at the weekend.

I did not do party bags, but I did hire a venue with a lovely outdoor area as well as indoors, lots of entertainment, music, crowns to make with stick-on jewels, a big castle to decorate and play in and I did really great food. There was a cupcake and balloons for each child to take home when they left.

I was shocked when one little boy who is not yet four said on arriving "I wonder what's in my party bag today". I thought it best to be honest so I told him that i didn't have party bags but would he like to make a crown to take home/ play on the ride-on toys/ paint the castle etc... He looked genuinely shocked and affronted and asked me if it was true and said that of course I must have party bags. Then he went to check with his mother.

On leaving he seemed really distressed, even angry, and kept tugging at his mother's sleeve when I offered him a cupcake and balloons to take home.

Nobody else was bothered, the kids had a lovely time, the parents said it was a great party. No one else seemed to be needing a bag of plastic tat to take home.

TBH I hate party bags. The contents are invariably cheap tat items that I have to hide before DD2 puts something in her mouth and chokes, and more sugary sweets- not exactly necessary after a party and birthday cake. There is usually something that falls apart within minutes. Parents search for items cheap enough to put in them. They are a waste- or money, the world's resources etc and the contents will be in the bin soon. So why bother?

Any one else dislike party bags?
Is it normal for less-than 4 yos to expect them?

Am I now to be known as the mean mummy?
Or will other parents appreciate me choosing not to do them?
Should I give a hoot what some snotty little 3yo thinks?

waste- of money, not or

We have (reluctantly) given in to the tyranny of the party bag, after a couple of years of resistance. I agree it is often a waste of money, but most children do (sadly) expect them these days - although perhaps not at 3yo. My 6yo ds virtually begged me this year. We are including cake, a lego mini figure, sweets, a balloon and a pencil. We haven't spent much on the party itself (cheap venue, no entertainment other than games, basic food), so don't mind the party bag expense.

Part of me wishes we could stand our ground, but it seems to be an integral part of the event now.

I was particularly proud of the pencils - pack of 3 Ben 10/Disney Princess pencils - 25p in Tescos (for 3!). There is no going back now...

I did nine party bags a few weeks ago that included a slice of cake, an inexpensive book (hurray for the Book People packs) and a small packet of sweets. No plastic tat.

I've thrown so much plastic party bag tat away recently - and cleared up spilled bubble mixture - that I couldn't do the same to other parents.

Kids do love party bags though, but they'll get them on my terms

we put a balloon, a glowstick, a pack of crisps, a lolly and a mini chocolate bar in ds's. I also avoided the plastic tat you normally get.