soft play party - no tea, thoughts please

[littlebylittle]

dd having soft play party for fifth birthday at end of sept and we will invite class plus few others. It means that there isn't a room for tea, but I wanted to be as inclusive as poss because close to start of reception year. It's five o'clock on a friday and I was considering two options:
1 soft play for an hour, blow out candles on cake, send children away with packed lunch tea, cake and party bag
2 as above with no tea!

I'm worried about sending them away with no food at six o'clock, but wonder also whether they might have had to eat before party anyway cos they're little. I don't want to be mean but neither do I want to prepare a tea that largely speaking isn't eaten or needed. What do you think?

I think its important to include food at a party.

Do you mean its at a soft play centre and you are inviting more children than their party room seats?

If thats the case can't they rope off a section of the public area for your group?

I'd also make it longer than an hour. It takes a while for everyone to arrive and 'warm up'.

Brilliant to invite the class though especially with it being the start of school.

Softplay centres factor in a meal IMO
when does the party start? Is it 4-6? I'd be annoyed if my dcs didn't get fed during those hours
if you don't want to pay for a meal have to 9-11 on a Saturday morning

I would tell parents to give their children tea before. They will be fine about it, honest. You could also put plates of biscuits with the jugs of squash, water in case any of them were hungry. Piece of cake and packet of sweets in party bag and everyone is happy

From what you've said it's 5-6pm. You should not feel obliged to offer food at a party, you are the host, it is up to you what you offer. I do not "expect" anything when DD's are invited to a party, but I think you should make it clear on the invite so that parents can decide to feed before or after.

FWIW I wouldn't have any problem with my 4.5 year old DD having her tea at 6.30. I would probably give her a snack before the party and have tea when she got home.

I do think there needs to be some food at this time of day. How about trays of sandwiches for kids to come and help themselves as they like?

they will need food at that time - they will be awful otherwise!

unfortunately in my experience you are obliged to feed kids at a party - I think your option 1 sounds quite fun actually so I'd do that

if you don't feed the kids people will be talking behind your back for a few weeks

An hours not very long though
by the time kids have been dropped off it'll be 5.15 and then parents will start coming back 5.50 probably
you'd be better off having it at home for just an hour and have parents stay for a drink

Never mind folk talking behind your back, the kids will be overtired, hungry and grumpy by the end of it!

I think option one is the best tbh. I would love to do saturday party with big tea, but not option. I do feel uncomfortable about not feeding the children - want to be inclusive not do it cos I want to get out of feeding them! I could just invite 25 and have tea there, so then two hour party, but there are 27 in the class and it'll be a bit soon for dd to pick and choose her friends. They are quite little so by the time it's six fifteen some may be past having a group tea so at least they'll be nourished on the way home (even if just the cake they actually eat!).

I would expect most 4-5 year olds to be able to sustain an hour's play without suffering meltdown. If parents think that they need food to see them through then they can provide it.

In what kind of circles to people care enough to talk behind someone's back about something so trivial .

ok, so if you invited 25 then you would be able to have the tea at the venue?

but because you want to invite the whole class then you can't? correct?

if you do it 5-6pm on a friday is it close enough to school that they will have been able to go home, eat, change and get there for 5pm? if not i think you might have a problem with logistics generally.

is there anyway you could make it 4-5pm and then kids go straight from school, you have some squash, biscuits etc... to give them a snack before they go in? then they go home for tea?

if you make it clear that you can't do food as there are too many, parents will understand that, it's just that 5-6pm is a tricky time as typically tea time?

so there are 27 in the class but the centre will only accept 25? is that what you mean?

If so I would say there are 25 then if 27 turn up (and dont think for one minute that all will attend) then they can stand at the end or grab a chair from the main bit and put them in. dont even tell the centre 27 have turned up(if theydo)

sorted......

5-6pm on a Fri for new reception children who are just settling into full days, without food - is a seriously bad idea IMHO.

Unless your party is between 9-11:30ish and 2-4:30 ish then i would expect food to be included.

Invited for play and giving tea to take with them. positive response so far, in some ways might be better than sunday party cos they can recover at weekend. Thanks for comments, ChasingSquirrels you're right really but doing the best job poss with the resources and money available. Will let you know how it goes!

Party big success, take away tea went down well and lots commented on how their dc enjoyed playing for the hour but would have struggled with another hour to eat tea etc. dd loved it and out like a light at bedtime with the whole weekend ahead to recover if needed.