How do you help a vulnerable young adult who is not your own?

[LadyWentworth]

Not one of ours but DDs friend. They are both 20. She lost her mum to cancer a couple of years ago. Parents were divorced and her dad largely absent during her childhood. He is trying to build bridges since her mums death but she struggles with the relationship. She is not in a good place at the moment. We have said she can stay with us as she is isolated but she doesn’t talk to us. She is on quite a lot of anxiety meds and also keeps drinking, to the extent that she ended up in a&e last week after being picked up in the street by the police. I am very anxious about her but don’t know how to support her.

Difficult. Let her know you're there as you're being. Probably the most important thing for her is to have a good experience of a caring relationship or if necessary a good ending to a relationship.

You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped.

If she doesn't want to talk to you there's nothing you can do. You can't force the issue.