DS has left home

Unescorted · 19/10/2024 23:01

You can be so proud of yourself. You have raised a functioning adult. Today you are rattling around the house but you will step out tomorrow knowing that you also have new horizons and he is no more than a call away. Well done ❤️

Original poster

Whatnow987 · 19/10/2024 23:57

Thank you @Unescorted 🙏

OP posts:

healthybychristmas · 20/10/2024 00:12

You have done an incredible job with him. He has been very lucky to have you as a mum. Now he's gone off to have an adventure and it's your time to have one too. What are your interests? If you can't think of any what were your interests when you were his age?

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 20/10/2024 00:13

Whatnow987 · 19/10/2024 22:56

My only child has left home. He’s 18 and I’ve been a single parent to him for 8 years. He’s done amazing well academically and was offered an incredible job opportunity which is why he’s left home.
Im unbelievably proud of him but I miss him so much. I know it’s mad but part of me feels like a failure as he’s left home almost as soon as he could. I have no partner, no local friends and no family and I know this is probably exaggerating the feelings of loneliness.

You've obviously done a great job with him!
And now is your you time x

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 20/10/2024 00:13

Ps nothing stopping you moving now too!

Ohjustalittle · 20/10/2024 00:17

@Whatnow987 I'm in a similar position. I now need to find a life for myself easier said than done when you've been a parent for over half your life. What's your plan? I've signed up for yoga already regretting it ha.

Elizo · 20/10/2024 00:24

Whatnow987 · 19/10/2024 22:56

My only child has left home. He’s 18 and I’ve been a single parent to him for 8 years. He’s done amazing well academically and was offered an incredible job opportunity which is why he’s left home.
Im unbelievably proud of him but I miss him so much. I know it’s mad but part of me feels like a failure as he’s left home almost as soon as he could. I have no partner, no local friends and no family and I know this is probably exaggerating the feelings of loneliness.

I have a 15yo and am single too and can imagine how tough it must be. You must be so proud though! I guess start thinking of some things to keep you busy and also your next meet up with him! Less washing - I’d probably also live on cheese and biscuits for a month

Original poster

Whatnow987 · 20/10/2024 10:32

Thanks for all the lovely messages. I just wish I could feel happier at the moment…

OP posts:

Ohjustalittle · 20/10/2024 10:44

I know, it's so hard. My youngest moved out a few weeks ago, the house feels so empty. I'm single too. I work full time so being at work helps a bit but I then come home to an empty house. I'm hoping that how I feel will get better. I'm off out for a walk soon, otherwise I'll just sit in my dressing gown all day moping.

Original poster

Whatnow987 · 20/10/2024 10:46

@Ohjustalittle sorry you’re having a hard time too. I work as well my my colleagues aren’t really friends as we have noting much in common apart from work. It’s all so lonely.

OP posts:

pilates · 20/10/2024 10:48

You must be very proud.

Did you not have any interests/hobbies when your son was living at home?

Original poster

Whatnow987 · 20/10/2024 10:50

I’m incredibly proud of him, he’s done so well!
A few activities which I continue with but alone.

OP posts:

Singleandproud · 20/10/2024 10:50

It's time to start building your own life.

Look at the cinema and theatre listings in your area today and go to a show to take up some of the time.
Look on event brite for activities and women social circles if you prefer that or a Ramblers group or make a priority list of things you want to achieve for you this year whether that's getting fitter, running a half marathon, learning to crochet, being in an am drama group and start making a plan to make those things happen.

Ohjustalittle · 20/10/2024 11:02

Singleandproud · 20/10/2024 10:50

It's time to start building your own life.

Look at the cinema and theatre listings in your area today and go to a show to take up some of the time.
Look on event brite for activities and women social circles if you prefer that or a Ramblers group or make a priority list of things you want to achieve for you this year whether that's getting fitter, running a half marathon, learning to crochet, being in an am drama group and start making a plan to make those things happen.

This is what I'm looking at doing. Im quite introverted but I do like company. Just one small change to my routine a week. There is a little cafe on my way home, I'm going to have my tea there once a week after yoga. I'm still dreading yoga I'm so bloody stiff. @Whatnow987 we can do this! We've raised our children to be independent that's a good thing.

Singleandproud · 20/10/2024 11:05

Yes, my local theatre opens for a coffee morning on a Saturday, DD hasn't left home yet but is at their dependent teen stage so I'm going to start heading there on a Saturday with a book.

Violetparis · 20/10/2024 11:05

Have you thought about getting a dog ? Something to focus on and get you out the house taking it for walks.

ViciousCurrentBun · 20/10/2024 11:07

Well done to you both.

Find local groups on meet up or Facebook that you have an interest in. I found a great women’s hiking group on FB when I retired and also a mixed hiking group on Meet up. It’s not too intense as a group setting. I tried a craft group as well, they were nice but just not for me. All free as well except a small charge for tea at the craft group.

ssd · 23/10/2024 09:56

How are you doing @Whatnow987 ?

I'm facing this very soon and my feelings of utter dread have really floored me.

MellersSmellers · 23/10/2024 16:23

Sounds like you need activities that are sociable, not lone. Go to Meet Ups, join a choir or a club, do an evening class, get an allotment, do some volunteering.....A dog is a good way to make sure you get out and meet people, if it would fit with your work.