Advice for getting son to get job

[ForBrickSnake]

My son dropped out of college course as soon as he turned 18. He has 4 gcse passes and a 1 year computer course diploma. He says he'd rather work but it has been months. He has never worked or had work experience (covid year nothing happened). I don't know where to start. He doesn't know what he wants to do. I'm trying to think of jobs you can train on or some part time work doing anything so he gets some 'real world' experience.

He has money saved to tide him over. He had not applied for anything. He sits on his computer and is given housework jobs every day which he gets on with. There's not much incentive- not interested in clothes, socialising minimal. No driving. These are things amongst other reasons I would have got a job, wanting money drive, go out, shopping.

I'd insist on him claiming universal credit to pay his way and hopefully that will be the kick up the backside he needs in order to decide what to do with his life.

I think the 'doesn't know what he wants to do' is a bit of a red herring.
Surprise! People don't grow up wanting to go into insurance or double glazing or being an FLT driver, but many, many of us fall into a career path because we get a job to tide us over.

Is there an expectation that now he's not in education that he contributes?
I mean he's not existing on fresh air. Who does he think pays for that (and am I right thinking you no longer qualify for child benefit? So it's costing you more).
If he's on benefits he now owes you rent.

I'm not coming from a place of experience but my opinion is that he's chosen to end his childhood & dependency by leaving education - so it's time to grow up and be an adult. That means paying his own way.

I feel for you OP. The lack of ambition for himself, after you presumably put a lot of time into helping him be the best he can be, would drive me bananas.

They are entry level qualifications really so apprenticeships would be a good call. Make sure he has decent skills based cv and knows how to write cover letters and succeed in interviews. Look on the national apprenticeship service website. He needs to make accounts on several job websites and search and apply most days. If he claims universal credit he will gave weekly meeting to guide him.

He's costing you electricity, food, heating and Internet at the very lest as an adult he should be paying board to cover these costs as life isn't free. He needs to get a job, start an apprenticeship or start claiming benefits (hopefully they will help him find a job). This will motivate him to actually do something. If you don't you are not helping him transition into becoming an adult.

You need to be firm that you expect him in full time education or work while he lives with you, give him a deadline & stick to it.

Sounds harsh, but give him lots of support with job applications etc. he will be grateful for the kick up the bum later x

He doesn't need to know what he wants to do for the rest of his life; he just needs to bring some money home for now.
He should be contributing to housework AND working, he's an adult.

I would add dont let him sit in his bedroom all day gaming if that is his thing or he'll never get a job (or leave home).

https://www.gov.uk/apply-apprenticeship

He clearly is not academic but he could become a plumber, CH engineer, certified electrician...... and end up earning more than a teacher...

If he signs on did UC then jobcentre advisors will be able to point him to short courses, employability schemes etc. You may also have a local careers service who can help with CV and topping up qualifications.

Apprenticeship.
Get a job in a supermarket and then apply for the management scheme when it becomes available.
He has to be doing something, if he doesn't have any idea what he wants to do then he has to take anything he can find for now. Explain to him that gaps on a CV don't give the best impression.

I have to agree with the others, unfortunately you're not doing him any favours by letting him stay home and not join the adult world.

I would have a chat with him and say that he can work or go back to education. If he chooses neither then he has to get out of the house in the day. If he wants to stay home in the day he needs to start paying some board money as electricity, food and heating are not free for anybody.

Plus he's going to have a gap not only in his CV but in his NI contributions.

There are lots of things he can do whilst he's waiting to discover what he needs to do.

Getting a bar job would her him out and socialising.

Working in a Charity Shop would give him valuable retail experience.

B&M aren't great employers but having a job like that might help him to focus a little on what he really should be doing.

I know you said he has 4 GCSES. Does he have English & Maths?

He has English & maths. I think the doing anything is the way to go, not waiting for the 'perfect job.

I think you're right. Anything would be good at this stage and often you find a job that you're good at and enjoy by just trying.

Plus lots of skills he picks up will be transferable.

Employers are also going to start questioning just what he's doing with his time and then he'll be struggling to get anything at all.

Would he sit with you and look what jobs are available?

I do feel for you OP. My 25 Yr old DS was the same and that was after achieving a 1st class degree in Maths! It completely drove me to distraction! Eventually he accepted a job that is poorly paid and uninteresting to him, largely because I pushed him. It's been a bit of a bumpy ride but I think he would admit that it was the right thing to do - he's earning, has the discipline of getting up and out every day, and has to interact with a wide range of people.
I would suggest that any job is a step forward at this point.
He's done a computer course so perhaps something along that line - he can self teach MS suite or do a 2 day course in Excel perhaps while he applies for an apprenticeship or something more long term. But the longer the inactivity goes on, the harder it will be to break out of it.