Hi,
Just wanted to make a positive post surrounding being a new mum. My daughter is currently 10 weeks old.
I never really wanted to be a mum. I have a lovely fiancé, lots of friends and was very satisfied with life. Other peoples kids really irritated me and I always thought a child would essentially ruin my nice life.
When I accidentally fell pregnant I was devastated. I was constantly flooded with social media posts about how hard being a mum is. How your life is over. How your relationship is over. How much your body changes.
I genuinely felt like my life was over and that I’d never enjoy sex again, I’d lose all my friends and hate being a mum. I went from being a happy career driven professional to a shell of myself during my pregnancy.
I chose to have an elective c section because I was in such a hideously negative place when it came to childbirth and my baby.
Social media told me that I would struggle with breastfeeding, postpartum recovery would be awful and that I’d absolutely get PPD.
the reality:
The c section was absolutely fine. The moment my daughter was placed in my arms the rush of love/oxytocin (which I’d been convinced c section mums didn’t get 🙄) was overwhelming.
My milk came in after 36 hours.
Breastfeeding was easy and came naturally to both me and my daughter.
Yes the first few weeks were painful recovery wise but my fiancé looked after me better than I ever thought it possible and I still look back at those early days as being so incredibly happy.
i didn’t get PPD. I didn’t even get the dreaded “baby blues” which everyone supposedly gets.
My relationship with my fiance is better than it ever has been. We’re intimate (which I thought we would never be again), were having sex 4 weeks PP, and the love we have for our daughter has only made us closer.
I was back in the gym after 5 weeks. My partner looks after baby while I go. I shower every day (WHY are there so many depressing posts about mums not even being able to shower?!!), meet up with friends almost everyday and we essentially lead our normal social life with baby in tow!!
i watched my fiancé bathing my baby this morning, both giggling at each other and I honestly cried with happiness.
my daughter is the most gorgeous, beautiful, happy, giggly little joy and I am totally overwhelmingly in love with her.
Basically, I wanted to make a positive post partum post. If I had seen more posts like this then maybe I wouldn’t have been drowning in anxiety during my pregnancy.
If I’d seen some posts about how utterly WONDERFUL post partum can be I wouldn’t have almost considered aborting my daughter.
I know I’m privileged. I have a wonderful wonderful fiancé and wonderful friends. Not everyone is as fortunate.
But please, if you are feeling overwhelmed with negativity surrounding having children please let this give you some hope. It really is truly wonderful ❤️
Edit: thought I should add that yes there are hard days. There have been moments where I have put the baby down, walked into the next room and screamed at the walls 😂 occasionally overnight I have considered putting her up for adoption (joke!) but it’s so honestly not that bad. ❤️