Thank you for your supportive advice on a thread yesterday regarding responding to a message. Update today.

[Janiejo]

For those of you that contributed, thank you.

Everyone here responded with a positive view of ex DiL’s message and that she was seeking assurances of confidentiality before we built up further contact with our DGS.

Before I could respond, she sent another message saying our DGS is too distressed by us sending cards and parcels and please can we stop. ☹️

I have replied with a message saying we are willing to work with her, on her terms, that we love our DGS and always have his best interests at heart. We want to get this right, not overstep into her new life but not distancing ourselves either.

No reply.

Perhaps she's pissed off with you sharing the details all over social media?

Perhaps…

but not much chance, in terms of probability, given the size of the population in the UK and wider, the large content on MN and the short time the post was up.

Somehow I don’t see how she would know it’s a post about her. Isn’t this what we all do for advice anyway.

I read your thread yesterday OP, and thought you definitely had the child's best interests at heart and were willing to do whatever his mother wanted so you could have contact of some kind.
She is now asking that you stop sending cards etc to him, but she didn't ask you not to communicate further with her, if I'm reading that right?
If I am, could you (take a day or so) then reply asking if it's ok for you to keep in touch with her? Say that you unconditionally agree to all her requests about how continuing contact will go and you will absolutely never share any news or information about him with your son, or indeed anyone.
It's obviously a very tricky situation for you all but I hope it works out for you.

Thank you.

She hasn't read the message sent (as above) guaranteeing her terms and working with her to build the relationship at a pace suitable to her and DGS.

We had no idea of anything that has happened overtime and have kept a very careful stance on not getting involved.

Good advice to leave it a couple of days and try again.

If she has blocked my number, I am stuck.