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Parents of adult children

Wondering how to stop worrying about your grown child? Speak to others in our Parents of Adult Children forum.

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Original poster

Doh! Flapping for no reason

7 replies

boredsolicitor · 25/12/2023 02:14

DD2 went out at 6 tonight for a drink with her mates - she's home from uni. I've been awake as I just can't settle til she's home . I went to bed at midnight and flapping because shes not home and that she's pissed somewhere. Just got up for a wee and spotted her bag and coat so she must have come home in the 30 seconds I be dropped off . I'm so bloody tired I just can't sleep - arghh!!!

OP posts:

MariaLuna · 25/12/2023 02:35

I get you OP. I have one adult child too.

But at a certain point you have to "let them go".

She's an adult, you gave her the best upbringing and she's home. Shows you you did a stellar job.

Original poster

boredsolicitor · 25/12/2023 02:57

Thank you marialuna . I wish I worried less . When she's at uni I don't even think about what she's up to . It's bizarre and irrational on my part !

OP posts:

PinkMimosa · 26/12/2023 18:18

DS came home at 5.50 am on Sunday morning then had the audacity to complain he was tired on Christmas Eve .

I think I've managed to convince myself by now that he's an adult and I really don't know what he's upto at Uni. It's hard though isn't it?

HamBone · 26/12/2023 18:31

I was the same a few nights ago when DD (18) was out with her friends. I don’t worry about her at all when she’s at uni even though I know there’s been some major parties- but I turn into a clucking hen when she’s at home.

Im trying to restrain myself as I know it’s annoying. 🤣

Original poster

boredsolicitor · 26/12/2023 23:06

That's it exactly- spoils their fun if they know they're causing you stress and absolutely no point to the worry . Rationally I want her to be out with her mates having fun so flapping is even more ridiculous!

OP posts:

bossybloss · 26/12/2023 23:08

I am the same …. I usually offer to pick her up from wherever she has been, as I will be awake anyway. ..

swayingstreetlamp · 26/12/2023 23:11

I'm in my 30s now but my mum used to do this when I was living back at home post uni 😅Same as you, when I was at uni (including a year study abroad in a foreign city!) she never worried, it was like out of sight out of mind, but once I was back under her roof she would wait up for me to come back from the pub. Can confirm that once I moved out she went back to not worrying, although she still does it occasionally when I'm back for Xmas!

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