Things like Easter.....

[CurlewKate]

This is the first year both of my young adult children have steady permanent-looking partners and I'm new to navigating this! Do you give equal "value" presents to your child and to their partner for things like Christmas and Easter? I didn't at Christmas- the partners got nice but smaller presents than my children did. Is that what others do?

My adult DC have had partners for a couple of years now but they're not living together (all at university). I think if/when they live together I'll buy them more of a joint gift at Christmas and equal for birthdays.
I don't really buy Easter presents just a chocolate egg or a bunny for everyone.

So my Mum and Dad buy me and my siblings a big present each on birthdays and Xmas (we are in our 30s but my Dad still buys me things like Doc Martens, trainers, jewellery I wouldn't buy myself etc). They buy our partners something smaller...a couple of tshirts and an aftershave, something like that. My partners mum is the same, she lives abroad so sends money but will send him 100 and me 40 or 50.

It's tricky, me and my siblings are all married and have been with our spouses for a while so they're part of the family. My mum does joint Christmas presents, but for birthdays, I think we get more spent on us than our spouses. Can't remember if she gets us anything for Easter, but if she did, it would probably be an egg each.

My PIL don't do joint presents at Christmas and tend to spend less on me than their kids for both Christmas and birthday (which is fine - they're still generous). It's slightly different, though, as BIL is single. I'm pretty sure we all get the same value Easter egg from them.

My parents in law have sent DH and I a cheque of the same value on our birthdays since we've been married (a very long time now....). Before we got married, I received a much more token present.

Easter is east as everyone just gets an egg!

never Heard of Easter presents unless you mean eggs! I think it’s normal to spend less on their partners. Or do joint gifts, particularly if they live together

We have a young one and three older - grown up, jobs, own place etc. two have dp we sometimes do joint presents
Easter, when they left home the eggs stopped lol much to their disgust 😂, so only youngest will get Easter eggs

I rarely give joint presents unless specifically asked for something expensive. I do, usually give my, DCs a slightly higher amount than their spouses. When they were courting it was a token present.
Easter is eggs nothing more.

Thank you all. Easter is significant because I love (yes, I know I'm ridiculous!) to buy slightly over the top eggs for my children and I've just realised it will be quite expensive if I have to double the order! Oh well, just have to grin and bear it....

Ah perhaps, just perhaps @CurlewKate you might have seen this dilemma coming then

My wife parents buy us thing a of equal value. Though I've been with my husband for almost 20 years which I think does make a difference as they very much see him as part of their family.

I think it is nice to treat them equally even if that means buying your DC something smaller so that budgets work etc.

I have spent equal on my kid's girlfriend/boyfriend from the very beginning of their relationships. You never know where the relationship is going but the last thing I would ever want is for them not to feel accepted