Aibu I'm 42 !

[Justontherightsideofnormal]

So my DS has just told me his GF if pregnant. Both 21 still living at home not been together long but friends for years. Both work and focused on future. I am pleased for them, yes very shocked did not expect this so soon but it's their life. A granny at 42 eek.

You had him young. I'm 40 and mine is only 6 but I'd love to think about being a granny sooner. If they're responsible that's brilliant. Congratulations.

Congratulations @Justontherightsideofnormal I absolutely adored my grandparents. I think it is a very special relationship.

Funny how people have said about repeating mistakes. I was thinking quite the opposite - that for your DS to think that this is a tenable option and be proceeding means to me that you absolutely smashed being a younger mum! Because he doesnt View being a younger parent as something negative. And you have brought him up in a way that means he feels confident and mature enough to do this. Babies happen when they happen, and always bright light into our lives - congratulations on the expansion of your family OP. I hope being a grandmother brings you a huge amount of joy.

Another perspective - My youngest is only 3 months and my mum is in her 60s and is at the end of life due to cancer. I am heartbroken that she will never see my children grow up. She doesn't even have the strength to hold my baby. You are young, fit and in the prime of life. Enjoy every second with your children and grandchild!!

Thanks @wibblewobbleball . He was/is very fortunate to have always had a secure upbringing as did his girlfriend so to him this something to celebrate, it's going to be a busy time setting up their home together and I hope their child has a similar experience, which is very much achievable.
Sorry to read about your mum that must be so hard for all involved X

It must have been a real shock! I suppose it's not ideal in some ways but that's life.
On the positive side you'll get to be in your grandchild's life for many, many years. I'm quite sad that my parents were so old when I had my children. They won't have each other for too long...

Oh I don't know. If they start young they will be like my parents- kids off the books by 50, able to save hard when earning the most and retired securely quite early with time and energy for travelling, grandchildren, a social life.
I did it the other way and had kids in my 30s and will be working forever.
I hope my kids have theirs while they are younger than I did, especially given the fall in fertility rates. They are smart and hardworking so it shouldn't mean they don't achieve or miss out in other ways.

I think it is wonderful news . Enjoy being a young granddaughter. Congratulations.

Oh congratulations you can be.glam.nan 😃

my mum was a gran at 40 and far from pleased about it, caused me all sorts of grief at the time !

There are advantages and disadvantages to having kids at different ages and stages in life.

21 isn't that young fir a baby

I'm in the same boat. I'm delighted for my daughter as she is exceptionally happy to be expecting her first at 24 - I feel that I am so young (and vain) at being a grandparent at 42 years old!

@igor congratulations to you too how exciting for you all

@Stepuptowardsinfinity , thanks for clarifying. Yes I'm not embarrassed , a little shocked as not expecting it so soon but will only ever be pleased for them as it's their choice and after all I had a baby, was married and a mortgage by 21 😳.

@Ruffpuff totally agree with you!

I had my first very young and for 10 years it was just me and him. We have travelled a lot, many city breaks as well as sunny holidays... yes I've never got to go away for months at a time but I'm still seeing the world, and sharing it with him 😊

Married with two more kids now but still make the effort to travel with my eldest.

@Justontherightsideofnormal , you sound a great mum, I'm sure your boy will be fine with parents like you as an example.
And congratulations

Wtf? Pretend to be mum? That’s bonkers and a very fast way to alienate the child’s actual mum.

you can never guarantee “tonnes of lifetime” whatever age you have kids/grandkids.

not everyone is knackered and dying of old age by 30, and incapable of being “energetic”.

there are pros and cons whatever age you have children. But this is a load of crap.

having kids young works well for many people. It doesn’t work for others. You make the best decision for you.

o/p Yabu as they’re the same age as you when you had your dc. So can hardly judge. You’re maybe only seeing the downsides from your own pov at the minute, but there must have been good things about being a young mum?

You had him at the same age!

Being a granny is fantastic. Congratulations, hope all goes well.

Congratulations on your incoming grandchild!

I think it’s perfectly natural to feel a bit funny about it while you’re still of childbearing age yourself, even when you have no desire to have any more of your own. You sound like you’re a great mum and you’ll be a fab granny-lucky baby!

@Lastnamedidntstick
Please read what I have written. I'm not judging no idea why you think I am?! I support them. I absolutely loved being a young mum.
I just was not expecting being a granny at 42!

I was younger than my ds is now. However my dm was late 40s

I was 22 when I had my first, 29 fit the others. I'm really glad I had mine young as the thought of having teenagers whilst I'm in my 50s isn't attractive to me! No regrets here, and congrats to your family.

Exciting news OP! I was a mum at 21 too.

Made me grow up fast cos we didnt have 2 pennies to rub together. He was still a student and id just graduated. I fixated on saving for a deposit because i wasnt in the situation id wanted to be in when becoming a mum.

Itll be the making of them. Congratulations!

And to the poster who became a great-aunt at 40...i was a great aunt at 28!!!

Regardless of my own age, I'd be a bit gutted if my child got pregnant at 21.

Oh that’s so young :( Good luck to them both! Hope they can make it all work out okay 🤞