Thread 45 GCSE Covid Cohort - Bunnies bouncing into Spring

[OrangeCinnamonLatte]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had

previous thread

My DS sounds similar to yours @EasilyDirected . He hasn’t been out as much as first term as work is much more I think. Maybe once or twice a week, mostly to Wetherspoons. He now knows he doesn’t like clubs - hadn’t been to one pre-Uni. They go to the cinema and he likes the college bar. His friendship group do board games and quizzes and they always have a Saturday film night and they watch a series together. Plus sport. He does a few formals each term. They had a really snazzy one with the Law Society out at Granchester and is doing his college ball. Also quite a few plays and music performances. I think he wants to try as many as things as possible!

Hi AoC!

I am surprised by how much DS does go out, including clubbing. I'm no sure how much he likes it but he definitely does it.

@craggyrat yes, I've thought from previous chats that your DS sounds a bit like mine. DS had never been clubbing pre-Uni either. He does go now but it is a small town club on a student night, hardly the big clubs of my student days which I don't think he'd like. No cinema where he is, they mostly drink in the SU because its much cheaper than the pubs (no Spoons either). He is in one sports club too. Not much cultural stuff, this is definitely a difference between being in a small town and a uni city. He likes exploring the town at weekends, it has lovely parks, Roman remains etc and is starting to venture further afield on public transport.

DD almost tried a sport, but didn't quite make it...! Her friends all go to the same two weekly student societies, which both run late into the evenings, which is also more sociable than I might have predicted. (D&D, and Zine-making.)

My ds loves a party. There’s not much clubbing action down in Oxford for him compared to home in Newcastle but he still manages to have lots of fun! He works hard and plays hard… makes me exhausted just thinking about it!

@Shimy Sussex university is on the very outskirts of Brighton in Falmer. It's 6 miles from the city. Most accommodation is nearer the city. Ds's place is about half way between the seafront and university, so 3.4 miles away. I suppose that is walkable on occasions. Ds1 was 1.8 miles from UEA he always walked, he's too tight with money to pay for a bus!

Can I join. I have a 2020 GCSE dd2. She's having a gap year currently then off to uni next year.

Hi @MargaretThursday and welcome! There are a few on here with deferrals/gap years. Has your DD got a confirmed place?

Hello @MargaretThursday and welcome aboard!

Thank you!

She's got a place at Chichester to do Musical Theatre (Music) which is totally unchartered territory for our family-we're all science/maths based.

Hi @MargaretThursday - welcome to the thread!

@MargaretThursday I think I am right in saying that @AnneOfCleavage 's DD will be starting at Chichester too. We live not too far away and DS applied there but went elsewhere.

Welcome @MargaretThursday !

Dd is an extreme extravert and is rarely alone. The clubbing seems to have reduced to about twice a week but she’s always socialising in some capacity. I feel exhausted listening to her talk about her life, but she’s always been like this, living in a social whirl. At least at uni I don’t have to keep track of her, give lifts to and from the station constantly and try to remember who’s staying over when. Life is so relaxing with just ds at home as he’s so self-reliant and most of his socialising is with the same group of 4 lads.

Welcome @MargaretThursday my DD is restarting uni in September having decided that she was on the wrong course before Christmas, so will be going back to Halls, Fresher's and new course, albeit at the same uni.

Welcome Margaret. I’ve got one MT graduate (L6 diploma) & one music undergrad who wants to be an MT pit player or MD.

Welcome Margaret.

Well, DD managed to navigate a trip to her grandparents involving multiple changes at stations she hasn't previously been to. That's a BIG thing given how anxious she was in sixth-form! Now she's buckling down to meet end-of-semester deadlines.

DW and DS are on their way home; DS (Y11) has bagged his first windsurfing trophy of the racing season. He does seem to care a bit more about that than his GCSE revision, so we'll see how things go.

Hi Margaret! How is your DD passing her gap year? If that's not too nosey?

Thanks for the welcome.
@EwwSprouts she had a job until December, but then was ill with flu for weeks, so had to stop. She's just applied for more jobs now and has some interviews next week, so fingers crossed she gets one of them.

Just to reassure you that my daughter has found that other students have all been very relaxed about when each other need some time to themselves and space to be quiet. The first few weeks were a bit more intense but even then there was one girl who didn't go out in the evenings at all but was still accepted and included in the things she did feel comfortable to attend. The QTS courses are quite full on with sessions to attend, reading and assignments so they need plenty of time to get on with that. Hopefully your dd will find a similar group of understanding friends!

Welcome Margaret.

Just dropping in briefly to say hi, as nothing to say about uni stuff as my ds on his gap year. Just back from Africa. One weeks work away in UK helping out at a sporting event and now looking for a job near home to raise cash for next planned adventure to Asia. Hopefully, he'll have a chance to visit his prospective university at some point too, as he's never been there.

Yes @EasilyDirected well remembered, DD is starting Chichester this Sept after a gap year. Welcome @MargaretThursday (you HAVE to be a NS fan - DD and i love her books and they are my go to when needing a comfort read). Is your DD on the Bogna campus for MT? Our DD's will prob cross paths if so and DD is a BIG musical theatre fan and would love to join in any likeminded clubs at uni :-)

@Seeline what course is your DD doing in Sept? It's lovely there's a few of us still on this thread who have DC starting (and re-starting) this Sept. Does she get first dibs on accommodation as she applied with grades and so i guess unconditional?

Thank you for your stories and anecdotes on your DC and how they are coping socially. It's reassuring to read. So glad your DD has found her tribe @kiwiandcherries and thanks for the heads up a bit on how busy DD should expect to be doing a QTS course.
She's had this horrid stomach bug this weekend and it's wiped her out but I'm glad she was at home for it so I could look after her - never had one before and it was a humdinger of a bug! So much around and working in school settings it's an occupational hazard I guess.

I feel DD will be a reluctant clubber too @Piggywaspushed having tried it once and not been keen but loved the prees at various bars and the excitement of getting ready to go out. I preferred that element of a night out too.

welcome @MargaretThursday (Am I right in thinking of the Thursdays child has far to go books from my childhood??)

loving having Ds home although him and dd are bickering a bit. He’s sitting huffing at the table over some work and amusing me no end! We are all off to the West Country on hols next week - so looking forward to some down time all together!

Hello everyone

I was on these threads for a long time but left as I needed a bit of space as we still were being careful of viruses as we came out of restrictions, which was a different situation to others. Dd has a place for Uni this September and I trying to remember how to do the finance stuff which is why I came on here and it was nice to follow some more normal journeys that you’ve been on.

If you remember, right at the very beginning of the pandemic, my youngest Dd was absolutely fine one evening then the next morning found her having a massive prolonged seizure. It was viral encephalitis from an unidentifiable virus and it damaged her brain.

Dd has had a gap year to ‘sort her brain out’. She’s had tests at specialist centres around the country and could probably glow in the dark from various scans and injections. At the moment she has no hair on her head but lots of stitches, because she had 17 SEEG electrodes drilled and positioned inside her brain robotically. The operation took 6 hours. They then woke her up, took her off all her meds and tried to analyse where the abnormal activity was coming from. She couldn’t move out of the hospital bed for this time as she was literally attached to the wall by (17x8) wires and had multiple overhead cameras recording her at all times. After a week of this, they had data where the damaged part/s were so they stimulated the wires one by one to induce seizure symptoms and got her to talk as much as possible through it. She was on morphine for some of the week but in pain and had a cannula in at all times for resuscitation meds ‘just in case’. She is desperate to live as normal life a life as possible and the epilepsy meds don’t work well so is determined to see surgery through. I stayed and slept by her bed with her in hospital. We were in a ward with very poorly patients which was distressing in itself.

So after another op to remove the electrodes, we are now back home, fresh-bandaging her head every few days and waiting to see if the damaged area of her brain can be taken out. And if it can, weigh up the cons (paralysis, memory loss etc) versus the holy grail of being seizure free. It is so much to take on board as a family. I heard splashing and dragged an unconscious Dd out of the bath last month after a bad seizure which makes surgery more appealing for us but it’s her decision in the end. Big surgery is 6-8 weeks recovery.

I have had a lot of support from mumsnet over the years (known some of you from way back with my first child at Uni) and wish we had support in real life but I think it’s all a bit too scary/different/off-putting for people around us, particularly young people. And as you can probably tell, we could do with some kind of therapy/ paradise island holiday after the last 3 years but out-pouring to you lot is all I get at the moment! Dd has said I can post on here but please, please don’t share this story as I feel we are safe and pretty anonymous in this little section of the board.

Give your university first years a massive hug when they get back for Easter. I really hope she’ll be at Uni procrastinating about coming home this time next year.

I saw a few are on gap years here so hopefully I can come back and confirm we are joining the journey very soon x