Im starting to dislike sons Gf

[Jeansandjumper75]

Son has been a long distance relationship with girl for 2 yrs. She lives with her parents rent free and they wait on her hand and foot. When he brings her to my home she’s shows no interest in us, never says thank you for gifts/hospitality.
If I post pictures of my son and his sister together having fun, she’ll immediately post pictures of her and my son together.
Im trying my best, but I get the feeling she’d be quite happy if it was just her family and my son.

She lives with her parents rent free and they wait on her hand and foot

🙄 How do you know this exactly? Do you have a spy camera in her home? You sound like the potential MIL from hell to be honest and she can probably sense your animosity. Your opinion on her doesn’t matter one percent, the only one that matters in your sons.

What sort of work (if any) does the girl do? If she hasn’t got a diverting career you should tell your son to be wary of an “accidental” pregnancy. Then you’d be stuck with her in your family forever.

This is what I’m afraid of! But in the same respect I dislike the idea of sitting back whilst she takes ‘liberty’s’. I know for fact if my son displayed the same behaviour in her family home it wouldn’t be accepted.

What responsibility have you taken in this?

Have you raised your son with discernment?
Have you ever tried to see anything from HER point of view?
Have you sat down with them and talked things through or is all this said behind her back?

Don't play the victim.

OP don't panic too much, she's his "at home girlfriend"

Young squaddies do this, they have a Mrs back home but will shag most things when on deployment or exercise in a different town, knowing if the "play safe" nothing will come back on them . Or if they aren't "playing away" the interest in the "hometown girlfriend" is fairly minimal.

He's in his 20's and the armed forces, this isn't the girl he will marry. Let it run its course.

This will fizzle out.

Wow @Weepachu you should get yourself some help.
They really aren't normal thoughts.

OP until you said about the trying to blame your youngest for damaging things, my thinking is that she is probably quite shy and potentially overwhelmed in your home. I've had two of my adult dc live here with their partners, for various reasons over the years. There was a massive difference between the one who was slightly younger and who had only lived at home, vs the one that was about 4 yrs older when she came to live with us for a bit, and she had lived away from home for 3 years, plus been woth for two years before going to Uni and woth whilst at University as well. She just had a lot more experience of dealing with all sorts of different people and also of living with people who weren't her family. It is quite an eye opener when you first do that.
Like others, I suggest you just remain open, friendly and welcoming, and stay right out of it. It is your dh's call, not yours. Just don't get involved.

I see your point, up until she deliberately tried to get my young daughter into trouble I was very much our ‘house is yours’ I even said she was welcome to come over when my son was away. I also invited her for Xmas because her family were shielding with covid, even though I was very ill with an Addison’s disease flair

Grow up