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Parents of adult children

Wondering how to stop worrying about your grown child? Speak to others in our Parents of Adult Children forum.

Me me me

2 replies

Idliketogohomenowplease · 13/12/2022 23:20

Single parent of 20something woman, we had awfully hard times and situations all throughout. Yet we always had love and fun. I can't stand it/her anymore, I'm literally waiting to die! Everything I say or try to do isn't good enough, I feel like a stupid husband or something to her, maintains I misunderstand. Just now, after several remarks recently about how I'd never made her birthday special, I was trying to order her 40£ cake online, couldn't find it, asked for help, got scratched when she took phone from me, I said she could try to be nicer or more grateful, (as I've been trying to communicate to her for years now) this turned into I don't want a cake drama and tears upstairs. I'm so tired , she makes me feel useless and stupid, have a health condition where I'm tired, depressed and in pain, honestly, what about my birthday cake!! I've bought my own card/ or mother's day card more than once, everything is about her I don't want to put her out because she's just not mature , honestly, I've given all I've got, I've ordered some weed for Xmas and plan to get drunk a lot , life SUCKS 😔

OP posts:
AnnieSnap · 28/12/2022 01:44

Sorry to read that it’s like this for you. I’m surprised no one replied to you sooner. The way you adult daughter behaves is sadly not uncommon. My youngest was self obsessed and pretty horrible at that age too. I think it’s important that you find things outside your relationship with her that make you feel good (e.g. spend more time with friends, or join groups focused on things you do/might enjoy). There is a middle ground between trying to do things for her that she throws back in your face or putting her out. Try distancing yourself from her a bit more. If you do her washing, cook her food etc, stop doing it. Tell her she is old enough to take care of herself and since she doesn’t treat you with respect, you won’t be doing it. Does she pay you a reasonable (not token) contribution to for food and all household bills? If she doesn’t, she should. She will respect you more if she realises the responsibilities of adulthood.

PritiPatelsMaker · 29/12/2022 12:16

Agree with Annie

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