Reassurance needed

[Bilbo1237]

Hi
My son left home to join the armed forces at 16 he is now 18.
He visits now and again when he has leave.
If I text him he always texts back.
He calls now and again but most calls are usually because he needs help/ advise with some thing, which is fine because that's what I'm here for.
But I feel like he wouldn't text me if I didn't text him.
I think my fear is I'm losing him.
My eldest son also lives far away but he's always on the phone to me so I suppose I'm just comparing my two sons.
I want him to have his own life and I'm proud of how independent his is but some times it hurts.
I suppose I just want to be told this is normal behaviour from an 18 year old lad and I just have to learn to adjust.

When he does contact you are you asking a millions questions about his life? He might just want privacy, to mess up and rectify mistakes like we all have done and do.

my eldest moved out last year and every now and then we texts and they come round on birthdays and Xmas. They know I’m here if they need me for anything. They are independent and I couldn’t ask for more than that.

Him becoming more independent is natural and healthy.

Don't you think his army mates would take the piss if he was on the phone to Mummy all the time? He's making his own way, and he asks you for advice when he needs it. He texts you back when you text him.

Be proud of him and let him go and do his thing.

Perhaps he is just very busy. He is still very young and is still finding his feet. Encourage the visits and make the most of them. At least he calls and visits occasionally. That will continue, you won't lose him. He still has a lot of growing up to do, just be there for him.