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Parents of adult children

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Mum turned her back on during domestic violence

4 replies

Wildchild001 · 11/06/2022 02:03

Told my mum what has been happening during the grueling year I have been abused and she told me to not bother come looking for a place to stay with her, I today decided to leave this abusive relationship and I was hoping to lean on her for support and instead shes turned her back during one of the toughest moments in my life. I have no words for this I'm 22 with no children but am I wrong in thinking as a mother your first and only instinct is to protect your child when they reveal something of this nature to you? I explained how I feel so low I just dont want to be here anymore and I've been ignored and blocked by her. I had a troubled childhood due to her excessive drinking but we moved past this and built a good relationship over the past few years so I have no idea as to why she would treat me like this now out of the blue in this situation my emotions are all over the place so not only am i dealing with fleeing a domestic violent relationship but also i have lost my mum in the process too

OP posts:
Josette77 · 11/06/2022 02:27

I am so sorry.
You are so young and so strong I am so sorry your mom isn't supportive.

MrsTerryPratchett · 11/06/2022 02:36

You had a tough childhood and a shitty abusive relationship. But don't try to understand what motivates THEM.

The most important thing you can do is grow, work out what you won't accept and build a different life for you, and if you have children, them. The best people I know are 'circuit breakers'. People who have gone through what you are going through and they work, and grow and change. And their children have no idea what it's like to be scared and sad.

You sound great. Don't let the other buggers decide who you are.

Isaidnoalready · 11/06/2022 03:09

My family had a "you made your bed you lie in it" attitude to my mother, she even had a neighbour look through the window see my dad knock her across the room and she turned her back and walked away

Go to womans aid and/or call the domestic violence helpline don't rely on your mother

Advanceofthetrifle · 11/06/2022 06:34

Please go to the stately homes thread on the relationships board to get the support that is woefully missing from your actual mother. 💕

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