Life is just shit

[ILoveCake12]

My poor poor DD has just lost her job. She has had such a shit start in life, struggled all through school, bullied, no friends. In December, she got a part time job and it just lifted her and boosted her confidence. She had been trying to find part time work for over a year. They have just let her go. To be fair, it's been deathly quiet for weeks and she was last in so first out so it's nothing to do with her or her abilities or personality but it's just so unfair. She just has no luck. My DH has just gone to get her and I need to pull myself together and comfort her and try and boost her when she gets in. It's just so difficult though, I am in tears and just feel like throwing things around in frustration. Life is just shit! Why do some people breeze through life yet My beautiful, talented, friendly and funny girl have doors slammed in her face whenever she turns?

[reallyworriedjobhunter]

That's awful for her. I am so sorry. Deep breath and give her a big hug. She has a lovely Mum and that goes an awful long way.

[ILoveCake12]

@reallyworriedjobhunter

That's awful for her. I am so sorry. Deep breath and give her a big hug. She has a lovely Mum and that goes an awful long way.

That's very kind. Thank you. Xx

[Lilifer]

That is so tough. Life really is shite for young people these days, they get such a bad press and so undeserved, they are the best of us. Sending you and your girl a huge hug, she's got a lovely supportive mum. ❤️❤️

[NiceCardigan]

Aw poor her hopefully now that she’s had one job the next one will be easier to find.

[Bunce1]

I sympathise.

Bright side….she is much more employable now that she’s got some work experience behind her.

What about an apprenticeship- is that something she would be interested in?

And you’re right. It is shitty and unfair.

[FlorenceNightshade]

I think you need to get a grip of your emotions and make sure you don't feed into a disaster type scenario!
Yes it's crap but you've explained it's not personal or because she was bad at her job etc so it could be worse! She has some experience, someone to give her a reference and she will find something else.
Be positive and hopefully she will be too

[CrabbyAggie]

Commiserations to DD . I felt like crap for DS who really struggled to get a part time job, went on so many interviews and they didn’t bother to even tell him he was unsuccessful! He finally got one at Tesco in November but only for Christmas and they’ve let him go now.

How old is she? Is she studying?

[sashagabadon]

She has more experience now and no job is a waste, everything she learned ( including how to deal with and resilience at dealing losing a job) is useful.
You have dust yourself off and tomorrow is another day!
Can she get a good reference off previous employer? If they can write and post one to her she can use that for her next job interview.
Best of luck

[FlorenceNightshade]

Sorry pressed too soon!
I was going to see be positive, help her register for job alerts etc. Maybe encourage her to think about what she really wants out of work life now she's had a taste of it and see how you can support her to meet her goals. Yes let her have a moan and be a bit upset but unfortunately life is full of blips like this and she needs to learn to see these things as opportunities and learning points.
Also I know some people do seem on the surface to breeze through life but you genuinely never know what's going on in someone else's life so try and put those kind of unhelpful thoughts in the bin!

[TyrannosaurusRegina]

Having a lovely, caring mum (which you sound like) is an amazing basis for life. If I had had this growing up, I feel like I could have dealt with any shit thrown my way throughout my life. She is very blessed and I'm sure she will bounce back and find something else. She also has work experience behind her now. Best of luck to her.

[ILoveCake12]

@sashagabadon

She has more experience now and no job is a waste, everything she learned ( including how to deal with and resilience at dealing losing a job) is useful.
You have dust yourself off and tomorrow is another day!
Can she get a good reference off previous employer? If they can write and post one to her she can use that for her next job interview.
Best of luck

She is 19 and is at college but unfortunately it is all online so no chance to make new friends. Like your DS, she has had so many interviews and trials but they just never got back to her. So bloody rude, it's exasperating. Like my DD, hopefully your DS' experience at Tesco will stand him in good stead to get something else.

[ILoveCake12]

@sashagabadon

She has more experience now and no job is a waste, everything she learned ( including how to deal with and resilience at dealing losing a job) is useful.
You have dust yourself off and tomorrow is another day!
Can she get a good reference off previous employer? If they can write and post one to her she can use that for her next job interview.
Best of luck

I'm sure they will give her a good reference. They were very kind to her and felt really sorry letting her go. She is more positive and upbeat than me!!

[Calmdown14]

Getting your first job is the hardest. She'll find the next much easier with some experience behind her.
Going through the process is also a useful (if not enjoyable) life skill.
Be positive for her. And proud that it's nothing to do with her performance, just one of those things.
The next job might open doors she'd never have had in the little business. You just don't know

[CarrieErbag]

I'm so sorry.
I have a lovely 19 year old struggling with life. It's a strain on the whole family.
I hope things pick up for her/you

[KittyTail]

It’s simply the times we are living in. Something my dad once said to me has always stayed with me. He always taught me to get up and get on with things. I was very down after an unpleasant experience and he told me that I’d be fine because I was resilient. Just those words altered my mindset and gave me strength and determination to go forward. It’s an important life skill.

There are successes here, she’s had work experience and will get a great reference. Teach her not to dwell on it. It was circumstances that were out of her control. It’s simply on to the next opportunity now and there will be many.

[BowerOfBramble]

I'm sure you won't but please don't let this narrative come across to her: She has had such a shit start in life, struggled all through school, bullied, no friends...Why do some people breeze through life yet My beautiful, talented, friendly and funny girl have doors slammed in her face whenever she turns?

It's unlikely she sees her own life this way! I'm sure there have been good times and triumphs in between e.g. she did get this job, she got into college etc let alone the fun you will have had together at home.

Yes life is sometimes really unfair but what will really make a different to your DD's future is staying optimistic and not taking this to heart.

You can tell her that EVERYONE loses a job at some point and she's just got hers out of the way early. And give the girl some ice cream and a hug. Then tomorrow is another day.

[lakejupiter]

That sounds really tough OP but for what it's worth.....if she has a mum like you then she hasn't had a shit start in life! I read that post as someone from a difficult background with parents who had substance abuse issues and couldn't really be there for me and my first thought was I wish I'd had a mum like that! Don't know if it helps but my favourite motto is "it's not what happens, it's how you handle it" and with your support she'll be just fine.

[Snozzlemaid]

If she feels down get her to focus on the skills she will have learnt in this job.
She'll be much more employable now.
Hope she finds something else soon to boost her confidence again.

[Popetthetreehugger]

Maybe try a pub / restaurant?At 19 she can work behind bar as well as wait tables . Normally a good friendly crowd to work with . So many hours so accommodating with collage work ? Give her an extra hug 💐

[ILoveCake12]

Thank you all for your lovely messages. She's doing fine and I admire her resilience. The experience she has gained will be invaluable and I'm sure they'll be more opportunities. It's been a tough couple of years for young people that's for sure.