It's gonna be a long summer

[FrenchyQ]

Dd22 came back from Uni on Friday. Four days in and she's sad and lonely and upset. Her boyfriend (who lives a couple of hours away) is busy seeing his friends at home so is ignoring her. She go fired from her part time job as she ghosted them after furlough. She has no local friends as she pretty much ghosted them too.So she's mooching found the house with nothing to do apparently , DH and I both wfh full time, do there's plenty she could help with but we're unreasonable to ask.

It's gonna be a long 3 months!

Stating the obvious .... can she look for another job? There are lots of hospitality jobs at the moment.

Yes agree that she needs to find a job, hospitality would likely be the easiest.

I always found when mine came back form Uni for the summer, that they often needed a little “reminder” of what was expected of them. Mine were always expected to do specific household “jobs”, to tidy up after themselves and to help with cooking. You say your dd thinks “unreasonable to ask” her to help, well she needs to be told she is unreasonable to think she can come home and do live in the house as if you and her father are her maids/housekeepers.

She should also be looking for a job, any job, even if it’s just a voluntary role.

Excuse typos, hope you get the drift.

do there's plenty she could help with but we're unreasonable to ask.

What now? No, no, no. She doesn't get a choice as to whether she does her fair share around the house and you are doing her no favours if you let her get away with this nonsense. She's an adult, not a child anymore, and this laziness bullshit is totally unacceptable.

You need to have a very clear discussion with her about what you expect her to be doing. Moping and sitting on her arse isn't it.

@Aquamarine1029

do there's plenty she could help with but we're unreasonable to ask.

What now? No, no, no. She doesn't get a choice as to whether she does her fair share around the house and you are doing her no favours if you let her get away with this nonsense. She's an adult, not a child anymore, and this laziness bullshit is totally unacceptable.

You need to have a very clear discussion with her about what you expect her to be doing. Moping and sitting on her arse isn't it.

This. Absolutely.

And you're not asking. You are giving clear instructions as to what she needs to do to pull her weight around the house she is living in. Presumably for free.

She's over 18 and needs to grow up. Or she can move out and fund her own next year at uni if she'd prefer.

Thank you everyone for giving me a kick. I know I need to talk to her, she's just not the easiest to get through to (there's likely to be drama and a walk out). She did cook dinner tonight tho (and cleaned up), so at least that's a positive!