32 and a let down

[Lilye88]

Hi please don’t judge!

I’ve hit rock bottom and have contacted the doctors.

I think my parents are going to be unhappy again I don’t know how to tell them what has happened.

It all came to a head doing a food shop on Saturday in a supermarket. My daughter started having an anxiety attack waiting to check out as the lady behind was too close. I asked her “could you step on the red line” I was abrupt in my tone, it escalated to me shouting and calling her an unpleasantry swear word. The whole shop was silent.

I’m now worried that she’s contacted the police. I already have a record from before and am worried I’ll be sent down.

My parents are salt of the earth but I’m like the black sheep of the family and don’t know how they are going to react if it comes to anything. Sorry for posting!

You won’t be sent to prison for shouting at someone.

Contacting the GP sounds like a good place to start. How old is your dd? If she is that anxious does she need to be in shops right now?

You're catastrophising. Take some deep breaths and calm down.

You swore at someone in a supermarket for not distancing properly, is that right? If so, I'm sure it was horrible for everyone involved and I can understand your shock and embarrassment. It's over now though, you're home and safe.

People don't call the police because someone swore at them, and the police have better things to do than chase up non-violent verbal squabbles in shops. Lots of people are on edge and nervous at the moment.

My daughters 13, I’m a single parent so she has a few attachment issues from spending all the time with me during covid!

I’m worried I’ll be on the local police page via cctv for public order - Google is not the best of times!

Sorry for posting this

Did the person in the shop know who you were? Your name? Address?
If not I’d be very surprised if this comes to anything.
Did the shop staff get involved at all or ask you to leave..
Try and decide how you might handle it (or something similar) differently next time so you’ll be prepared.
How would you normally deal with her anxiety?

@sadpapercourtesan yes she wasn’t socially distancing my tone was abrupt but I lost it having to tell a lady old enough to be my mother to step on the red line. After 10 months of doing it I just had enough!

Are you getting your DD any help?

@Smartiepants79 no no details unless they took my car reg. the manager was called but I was leaving anyway. All she told me to do was “calm down” because I was mentioning my daughters anxiety.

I’ve contacted the doctors because I am hot headed - it’s not right I know but I’ve realised I need help.

I’m aware that people may not agree with how I reacted so please don’t judge.

@Ohalrightthen we’ve contacted the doctors for her but they weren’t much help and the local team has such a backlog it’ll be next year by the time she’s seen

It maybe learnt behaviour from me also.

The incident, while not ideal, isn't the huge deal you think it is - you're not the first person to have snapped under the current pressures and you won't be the last.

I'm more concerned that your reaction to it is to feel that you are a let-down, that your parents would be ashamed, that you deserve to be publicly shamed and go to prison.....

All of that is totally out of proportion to what happened and suggests that you are not in the healthiest place mentally and emotionally. It's depressive thinking (I do it too) and you sound incredibly anxious as well.

I hope this isn't patronising, but my advice is to forget all about the silly spat in the supermarket and contact your GP about your state of mind - there are medications that can really, really help with this (I take them)

[quote Lilye88]@Ohalrightthen we’ve contacted the doctors for her but they weren’t much help and the local team has such a backlog it’ll be next year by the time she’s seen

It maybe learnt behaviour from me also.[/quote]
What help are YOU getting?

Was the GP able to suggest any free online resources? Have you spoken to the school? Would it be possible to go private?

You posted this already????

Apologies for posting twice. I’m unsure on how to remove the post. If anyone knows please let me know ☺️