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Parents of adult children

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Original poster

Son not paying rent and I'm the guarantor

16 replies

AvaloniaFunk · 15/12/2020 08:11

son is 24 and in his last year at uni. Our relationship is not great ( long story) and he has not been communicating well with me, or any other family, for months. He will occasionally texts if he needs something urgent but that is all.
This morning I have had an email from his uni accommadation. It was addressed to him and was a final warning regarding paying his rent. His rent should be paid from his student loan which more than covers it. This is the first I have heard of it. It says they have tries to contact him numerous times with no response and if his rent isn't paid by the end of this week ( approx £3000) a 3% charge will be added. I am his guarantor but am a single mum to two younger children and have no savings whatsoever. Any advice

OP posts:

giletrouge · 15/12/2020 08:16

Oh that sounds really stressful and difficult. To be honest I think you need urgent legal advice, because if you are his guarantor you have made yourself liable. Can you contact Citizens Advice?

As for dealing with him, you are going to need to be firm. At 24 he is an adult and it's time for consequences to kick in. Can you ask him to urgently contact you?

HettySunshine · 15/12/2020 08:28

Do you know how his mental health is? It sounds like he might not be coping. Of course he could just be spending it all on beer and takeaways and having a whale of a time but it's hard to judge without knowing him.

Eggcellent29 · 15/12/2020 10:06

You need to ensure that you get legal advice and fast.

As PP said, you are liable for this loan and the additional charges if it is not paid.

So I would prioritise paying it quickly!

Have you tried to contact him?

JingleJohnsJulie · 15/12/2020 20:52

Speaking to Citizens Advice is a good idea but they may have a bit of a waiting list.

RaaRaaLaLaLaa · 15/12/2020 21:13

You need to contact him straight away and find out if he's intending to pay. He needs to understand that he can't just not pay it. It won't just go away.

Did the email say what steps they would take if it wasn't paid?

RaininSummer · 15/12/2020 21:28

Crikey. Unfortunately being a guarantor can end up costing a lot if money and never a good idea unless you can afford it. I wonder if contacting the landlord and asking for at least a pause on the extra charges would work whilst you try to establish if your son has blown through all the money.

Lazypuppy · 15/12/2020 21:31

Why did you agree to be his guarantor if you can't afford to pay it? By signing that the debt becomes yours

ekidmxcl · 15/12/2020 21:34

You are the guarantor so I think you will have to pay it if he doesn’t.

If you have no savings, could you ask:

your son’s father
any of your son’s grandparents?

Or could any of those contribute?

JingleJohnsJulie · 15/12/2020 21:36

Why did you agree to be his guarantor if you can't afford to pay it? By signing that the debt becomes yours

I think it's common these days for Universities to ask for a guarantor, probably for this very reason.

RaininSummer · 15/12/2020 21:50

Another thought, shouldn't the uni have got in touch with you, as the guarantor, sooner if the rent wasn't being paid? It doesn't seem right that they can leave it a fair old time and then just come to you once the arrears are huge.

JingleJohnsJulie · 15/12/2020 21:57

It's not fair no but I think they may need to prove that they've taken reasonable steps to recover the money from the debtor (DS) before moving into the Guarantor.

20mum · 15/12/2020 22:05

@RaininSummer

This is a fault in the law. It would seem obvious the guarantor should have been subject to an affordability check and advised of the serious implications. Equally obvious the guarantor should have been sent duplicates of all correspondence since the debt or potential liability was theirs. Above all, there should be a system to have student loans paid in stages, with a provision to hold back essential payments, rent being the obvious one, and on request to have the education authority requested to pay the landlord or the guarantor or other appointed responsible person directly. (This is a missing part of the benefit system, too.) Almost certainly, the student's money will have been squandered the moment it arrived in the student's account (drugs or gambling are a temptation).

StartingGrid · 15/12/2020 22:12

Was the guarantee paperwork executed as a deed, does it state "deed" anywhere wihin? Did you have the opportunity to seek independent legal advice? I only ask as my partner was in a similar position after trying to withdraw (long story), it got taken to court where we argued against it and defending the action ended up with it getting thrown out. If I recall correctly its unfair terms in consumer contracts you'd need to rely upon.

Lazypuppy · 15/12/2020 22:43

@jingleJohnsJulie yes i know its common for unis to ask, doesn't mean people should say yes if they cant actually afford it.

vanillandhoney · 28/12/2020 20:01

You need legal advice and fast. You're liable for this debt and the sooner you can pay it off, the better.

Dogsaresomucheasier · 17/01/2021 11:55

Is he participating in a rent strike due to COVID? Many are. You need to talk to him and students union urgently.

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