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Parents of adult children

Wondering how to stop worrying about your grown child? Speak to others in our Parents of Adult Children forum.

Adult child with chronic kidney disease

2 replies

Claraclara12 · 29/06/2020 09:08

My son is 24 and has CKD . He was born with one OK kidney and one very damaged kidney. Everything seemed “fine” until a couple of years ago when he developed gout and tests show the damaged kidney has declined. I am mad with worry and finding it very difficult to balance how to get him to take this seriously with not over worrying him about something that could all be sorted or is something that he will live with but doesn’t have to affect his life. I am a classic over thinker and I can’t discuss it with my husband as I drive him mad with my need for reassurance. Months can go by when I am paralysed with worry. Really looking for any help or tips on how to cope with this situation from this forum. Today I need to nag my son to get new appointments and tests which he missed because of the lockdown and just the thought of having to do this is making me very weepy and pathetic (after all it’s not me that has the condition)

OP posts:
Anthilda · 29/06/2020 09:27

Your worry will be amplified because your family are not communicating about a very serious issue.
They cant avoid the reality of it, and you cant carry that worry and responsibility (arranging appointments for example) alone.

Kidney disease will absolutely impact his life. But it will be way more manageable if he is proactive about his health.
Your husband should stop burying his head in the sand and face the facts of your son's illness for the simple reason that your son will need emotional support.

My best advice would be to speak to a charity specifically for kidney disease.
They will have lots of knowledge and may guide you through things that you have no experience of.

I hope all goes well for his appointments.
Medicine in this area is advancing all the time so try to stay positive.

Claraclara12 · 16/07/2020 09:07

Thank you for your advice - test results back this Friday so I have managed to persuade him to reregister and get back in the system. I can only pray right now for good news but if not will contact a charity as you suggest

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