I have a gap of about three years between each of my three. I felt that two children wasn’t enough, but three was ample! Seriously, three was the perfect number for us and they have always got on brilliantly, now aged 28, 31 and 34. Any more would have meant getting a much bigger car to accommodate them all.
When having the second I was worried about having enough love for a second but by the third it didn’t enter my mind.
The youngest has only just moved out, and the older two went away to uni and have lived away for quite a few years, only returning home for a few brief periods.
They love getting together and hate it if only two are present. There has never been any jealousy between them, and if I have ever had a little moan about one to another, they will always stick up for each other. They have lots of local friends in common and are very supportive of each other. Perhaps we have just been very lucky.
I managed to return to work after taking two maternity leaves and, since we were both teachers we had plenty of time to spend with the children. After the third I did supply teaching so I could manage to fit everything in and be more flexible with my time.
I am aware that things in the workplace have changed dramatically since mine were young. Childcare is now so expensive, there are so many rules and regulations about what you can and can’t do and you certainly can’t be late picking them up from primary school unless you are paying for after school care or clubs. Mine would do lots of free activities such as gym club, country dancing and choir which they loved, and I would also mind a friend’s children and she would return the favour. As a sahm your time is your own anyway and you seem to be coping and enjoying it.
Things do not need to be expensive. Spending time with them is more important. We always found loads of free things to do with them, lots of different parks to visit, taking picnics and meeting up with friends. Mine loved just being outside. I expect your two boys will be the same. If you spend time with them when they are young and get them interested in doing lots of activities rather than just plonking them in front of a screen, you should find, as they get older, they won’t want to be stuck inside, playing solitary games on a screen. Enjoy them.
Holidays when they are young do not have to be really expensive. You don’t have to take them abroad or stay in expensive hotels. A few beach days with sand and water keeps them happy. We got an annual zoo membership which was brilliant value over the year whatever the weather.
Go for it! I’m so glad we had three. Good luck.