Need help with routine for my baby please

[SleepyMummy31]

I need to get my 6 week old baby into a routine for the sake of the whole family. Yesterday was a nightmare. I'm exhausted from having to do all the night feeds (my OH needs to sleep cos of a stressful full time job) and the baby wants to feed all evening taking in tiny amounts then napping and screams if I try to do otherwise. This means that from 7pm til midnight I'm just attending to the baby and I need to get other stuff done once I've got my toddler to bed. I also need to try to get some more sleep cos after I've fed and winded the baby during the night, she makes loads of noise and sometimes possets a bit so I'm awake for an hour and a half at a time, twice during the night then up at 6am. She feeds and sleeps reasonably well during the day but is very difficult in the evenings. She's formula fed and is gaining weight very well. She doesn't have colic, she's not in pain, just seems to want a lot of attention all evening. I'm not sure if she needs less sleep during the day or more stimulation or what. Hence the need for a routine.

Any suggestions about how I could do this would be great.

hmmm, I remember this all to well! I do really feel for you, doesn't it feel like the loneliest place when you're up in the night?!

What worked for me was to make sure that during the day I made sure that everywhere was really light and noisy, music on, hoover, hair-dryer, go out for walks face just so your LO gets used to day and night. Also black out blinds are great for the evenings!

I'm sorry that I dont have much advice to give you, just wanted to let you know that it does get easier! hope you get more sleep soon xx

Poor you. I remember those days well too. You say you need to get things done in the evening? Is there any chance you could get some help during the day so there aren't so many jobs to do at night (i had a very demanding DC3 who would just feed and feed and feed at that time - it's very tricky)

Sorry - not much help.

how often and how much is she taking during the day? Also, how much is she sleeping during the day?

DD (11 weeks) is also formula fed and we have been doing the Baby Whisperer EASY routine since about 2 weeks. It has totally worked for us and i would thoroughly recommend it.

You might try swaddling her after you feed her to help her settle back into a deep sleep and stay there after a night feed.

Have you looked at the GF routine (daren't say her full name on here!)

We used it for DD1 who is now 4.5 years old and are currently using it for DD2 who is 16 weeks.

It's pretty regimented and you'll find that it's not always possible to stick (esp at first) because your baby needs time to adjust to it, but once they do, it works very well.

To sum it up briefly, DD2 has a feed around 7am, a short nap btw 9-10am, another feed around 10.30, long nap 12-2pm, feed around 2.30pm, catnap around 4pm, small feed at 5pm, bath and full feed about 6.30pm followed by bed. We wake her at 10.30pm for last feed and for the past 6 weeks or so she has slept through til 6 or 7am.

I would imagine that you will still need to feed a 6 week old at some point in the wee small hours, but once ought to be enough if she's getting enough milk during the day.

I expect I'll get shot down in flames for suggesting this routine as many people don't like the idea of it, but equally lots of parents swear by it, so I say buy the book and go from there.

Good luck!

I'm 37 weeks pregnant so feel free to ignore me, but, on the advice of friends, I've bought both GF and Babywhisperer in anticipation. I definitely work better on a routine so I can see that my baby might as well. Best bit of advice so far is to read the books and use the bits that work for you and your baby. To be honest, I am going to start with GF and see how it goes. It does seem regimented but I think I'll appreciate being reminded to eat and drink in those first few weeks!

I think the thing with GF is not to get downhearted if you can't follow the routines immediately. Instead, try follow as best you can and you'll find that by about 3 months, your baby will be settled into that way of doing things. As you say, MrsGangly, if you're a person who likes routine, then both you and your baby will benefit as it brings a sense of calm to an otherwise crazy time!

Of GF or baby whisperer I'd go Baby Whisperer - it's more of a rhythm than a routine... and baby's can't tell the time yet!! Also have you tried the baby book by by Rachel Waddilove which I loved too - again more of a rhythm than a routine.... and this makes it more flexible if you have a toddler and other committments.

FWIW 6 weeks is also the point at which you're at your emotional and hormonal lowest. You've run out of the magic baby/birth hormones which make you feel like the most clever person in the universe, ever, and you're still getting no feedback/joy from your baby (or at least I wasn't from my DS - first smile wasn't until 9 weeks miserable little so and so!!) And you're knackered - but you know that....

Things will get better - whether or not you but your baby on a routine....

oooh and I second swaddling to help settle the littlun

And have you got a sling - ring sling is the best in my opinion - so you can do stuff while carrying your baby in the evening - they hate to be alone, especially in the evenings.

Also to help settle your baby have you read 'the happiest baby on the block' - totally fab book IMO

Another vote for baby whisperer - we still do it very loosely at 8mo. It's really just an order of things - feed 'em, play with 'em, put 'em to sleep. It helps to stop them 'snacking' instead of eating properly and reminds you to make sure they sleep loads.