What rules do you have about siblings sharing toys?

[sethstarkaddersmum]

I am struggling to manage the toys/sharing/childproofing situation at the moment.
I have a 5yo dd, a 3 yo ds1 and a 9 month old ds2.

DD gets given age-appropriate toys such as Aquabeads or board games with lots of little bits. DS1 then plays with them (because we have always encouraged sharing) which wouldn't matter but then he leaves bits on the floor and the baby finds them.

aargh.

I need a new regime, don't I? Can anyone tell me what they do?

(this shouldn't be rocket science but I am so sleep deprived and stressed atm that I can't work it out for myself)

thanks

Can you make a space which is not accessible to the baby where it doesn't matter if little bits are left around?

Or only allow these types of toys during babies nap time?

baby's aaargh!

Your DD needs time and space where she can play with things that are age inappropriate for her younger brothers. So, when she's playing in "public" spaces around your home, it needs to be with toys that she can and will share. When she wants to play with aquabeads (etc..) she moves into a safe zone where her brothers aren't near.

If she has her own bedroom then you could get a desk for her in there with her crafty things, and small boxes on a shelf her DB's can't reach for polly pockets and board games. Then, have a rule to keep her DB's out of there.

If she shares a room then you'll have to make a high up zone downstairs somewhere where she has her things, and create times when she can play with them up at the kitchen table, with the doors shut, while you occupy the others in a different room/the garden.

Sharing is only appropriate with some toys. Many of her toys will be a choking hazard, even for a 3 year old. Plus, they will have toys that they thing are brilliant that she's grown out of, so they don't need to share those with her. Just remember to "promote" your 3 year old to being able to join in with suitable activities when he becomes old enough!

Ds1, 4yr old is only allowed to play with his lego and playmobil up on the dining room table or when baby ds2 is asleep.

He accepts and undertands it's potentially dangerous and loves playing with these toys as I don't let him a lot of the time. Have trained him to check the floor too. Easier as he's older than yours.

Some toys are for sharing and some are not. Both ds' have their own favourite or special toys that I would not expect them to share if they don't want to. ( not sure if I'm bringing up meanies but seems fair to me!)

mmmm
thank you, this is really helpful.

I can give dd more of a space in her room, which she doesn't share - in fact we have a little 'arts and crafts' table in the kitchen which I was thinking only this morning isn't working at the moment because the baby can just pull everything off it. That could go up in her room.
I like her playing with Aquabeads etc on the kitchen table because I can chat to her while I potter around in there, but maybe I will have to do that as a special treat rather than as the default location for the Aquabeads.

in fact maybe I need to split the arts and crafts stuff so the dangerous-but-not-messy things can go in dd's room (beads, friendship bracelets, Aquabeads) and the messy-but-not-dangerous stuff can stay in the kitchen (paints, playdough, felt pens).

baby doesn't nap much unfortunately . He used to have this great routine where he fell asleep on the way home from picking dd up from school, but alas no longer.

My 11 month old is like that now, doesn't want to miss anything the others do, so won't sleep in the daytime much. Its most annoying, I sympathise.

Sounds like you've thought of a good system already! Juggling activities (usually not literally) so they're all occupied at the same time is going to be the bane of my life over the summer hols I suspect. I haven't got it cracked yet, but I have discovered that letting the younger ones share the older ones activities just isn't always possible unfortunately.

there, reorganisation is done, thanks to baby having an atypical nap
thanks for the suggestions everyone.