I know this has been done many times and im sorry but any advice welcome!
i have 4.5 dd from 1st marriage and 19month ds with dp, i am 31 and dp is 41, he really wants another and soon because of his age. i also think this is partly to do with the fact i have 2 children but biologically he only has 1 and longs to have 2 of his own, dd stays with her dad a few nights a week, im currently a sahm, the house, car etc is big enough and we would fortunatly mangage financially, sounds perfect BUT DD does not get on with DS, she constantly shouts, pushes and is just not nice to him, im constantly the referee between them, ds really looks upto her and just cant understand why she is so mean,she says its purely because he is a boy but she has found it so hard having to share her mummy. DS was a really trying baby, only slept through at 15 months and was a very cryi baby! so am i mad to go back to the beginning? but now at 19m he is fantastic, he loves babies and i think he would love a sibling but i dont want to upset my dd1 more, or make her feel pushed out and if it was another boy she would be distraught! (she has s 1yo sister at her dads who she is lovely with)
plus i was going to enrol on a teaching assistant course and get myself back a bit with a part time job as dd start school in ept and ds nursery in Nov 3 morn a week but to have another baby means writing myself off for another 2 years really! I think he wants it more than me as ive done it twice and wanted to get my life back a bit i love being a mum but find not working has been hard to get used to, DP is a fantastic dad and i really want to make him happy, we have both been through a lot in the past with failed relationships but we are really happy and love being a family together especially when he though he was never going to have any dc's, but he does work long hours so its me that does pretty much everything with the kids and home!
Big decisions !!