How do i stop ds (14months) from putting his fingers down his throat...

[luckylady]

DS puts his fingers down his throat so that he gags. He has now started to do it when I put him tobed if i leave the room he does it to throw up..

I know I should prob stay in the room and I do 2 out of 3 nights but I am trying to get him to go to sleep on his own ( as he did from being 8weeks old till recentley)

I have now managed to get him asleep on his beanbag in the front room!! think I will leave him down here for the night asnd sleep next to him.

He is always tired by bedtimes and I am almost sure he does it for attention (which he has near enough 24/7) I stick to the same routine of tea, play, bath , bottle , cuddle, bed... which again has been the routine since 8weeks old...

What can I do...

Do you have a monitor, luckylady? If so, can you hear him if he makes himself sick?

I would suggest putting him to bed as you have been doing, leave the room, then listen out for him. Keep checking on him every few minutes too, but don't speak to him or make eye contact. If you hear him being sick, then go in, calmly take him out of his bed and sit him in a chair or on a bean bag, change his bedding and put him back, without talking to him or making eye contact, except to say goodnight to him again.

If he gets the message that it earns him no extra attention he will stop fairly soon, although it may take a few nights!

The alternative is that he dictates how and where he goes to bed - and where will it stop? The sooner he learns he can't do it the easier it will be to stop the behaviour. It might sound a bit harsh, but what you are emphasising is that being sick on purpose results in boredom and no attention, rather than being punished.

Miaup- Thank you. I do have a babymonitor and we can here him so run upstairs to try and stop him..

It is hard as he also just screams and screams when you leave the room. Tbh I don't normally let him come back downstairs we normally change his bed, bath him again and put him back tp more screaming. It can take up to 1-2 hrs somenights to get him to sleep if we don't sit in his room and even when we sit in his room it still takes 30-60mins!!,

sorry Miaou

I know many would say let him throw up and see how he likes it, but I couldn't do that.

My ds3 used to put his fingers in his throat and gag a bit, but never to the point of being sick. I used to whip his hands away and say no very firmly. Thankfully, it seemeed to be just a short phase.

ll - quick post as ds is crying.

I wouldn't try and stop him - that's what he wants you to do. When you go in and stop him you are interacting with him so he is getting the attention.

Call me a hard-faced so and so but tbh I would leave him to cry! Once he realises you aren't coming in to see him (or if you are you aren't going to interact with him) he will give it up in a relatively short time (a few days).

Rather than the bath each time, I would wipe him over with a cloth and bath him in the morning - the less contact (therefore attention) with you at night, the better.

good job I can touch type - back later

Thanks I will try but I am a big softy...
never had any of this with DD she has always just gone to bed, if she wasn't tired she would just lay there or entertain herself until she dropped of bless her.

Hi luckylady, ds has stopped feeding at last!

There is no doubt that what I am suggesting is hard, but it is probably less hard in the long run than spending the next year or more having to put him to sleep in whatever way he dictates.

All I would say is, whatever you do, be consistent, otherwise he will be confused, if he is sometimes left to go to sleep on his own and sometime given company.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do!

Thank you Miaou, I will let you know how we get on.

Thanks again for your advice.