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Original poster

Help needed for 2 yr old who seems to be a cup phobic....................

27 replies

HellyBelly · 14/08/2005 14:47

I really need some advice please, sorry bit long.......

I'm trying to say bye bye to my ds's (2.5 yrs) bottle but we have a problem. He appears to have a phobia regarding cups and I don't know what to do. He used to have several bottles and cups with lids when he was younger and used to switch between them no problem. Not sure when but at some point he decided on certain cups/bottle and now we have a huge problem.

He has to drink his juice out of a certain cup (anyway up cup with handles) and won't even have the same sort of cup that's a different colour because he knows it's not the right one!! He also knows the teat he wants for his milk so at night when he has this it's had to be the same one. Now the teat has a hole in and HAS to be replaced, I therefore want it to go altogether. Problem I have is he won't drink milk out of his juice cup and won't use any other cup (I have a cupboard load of all sorts and have tried him with all)!!

I think he's actually phobic as he cries and acts nervous if he sees one of these cups as he thinks I'm trying to make him change again.

What do I do???

I managed to get rid of his dummy a few months ago after a few tries and it was fine in the end. Used lots of positive praise about being a big boy etc etc. However, I can't just get rid of drinking cups altogether can I.

Has anyone else had a problem like this? He's the same when it comes to what drink he has (only ever drank water and then was always milk and water slowly stopped. wanted him to drink so tried different squashes. he ended up liking ribena and wouldn't try anything else so i got another blackcurrant drink, then strawberry squash and just said it was ribena. problem is if the colour is orange he won't drink it !)

PLEASE HELP

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Nemo1977 · 14/08/2005 14:50

How about him picking a special cup for milk..i dont know maybe buying thomas tank stickers or whoever his fave is and then let him decorate whatever beaker he has chosen?

KemalsStilletto · 14/08/2005 14:52

Hi Helly Belly, How about having the other cups out at playtimes and letting him just play with them in daily play for a few days so he can get used to them and maybe let him play feeding teddy with them and stuff.

Original poster

HellyBelly · 14/08/2005 14:59

Thanks Nemo - tried buying him a special bob the builder cup being sure he would switch but he wouldn't even try. I'll try that with the stickers as he loves Thomas and loves stickers.

I'll also try what KemalsStilletto suggested but I sort of tried something similar last week. I had every cup out and put them all on a table for him to pick up and play with. He freeked out and insisted they were put away. I gave in as he was so upset (and doesn't cry often!). I'll try with teddies etc and see how I get on. Another thing I did try was.....you know those sets of cups you can play with in the bath, some with little holes at the bottom??........well, when I bath him I brush his teeth in there and he has a drink of water out of the cup without the holes. He loves drinking out of it but when I brought it downstairs to play with, he was having none of it!! Will try again though!

Will try these but please mention more idea's if you have them. Reckon I'm gonna need all the help I can get!

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Tortington · 14/08/2005 15:12

take him to a place where he can have a cup with his name on.

are you sure its a phobia rather than a "i don't want to?"

if its the latter i would get rid of the element of choice and leave one cup

Original poster

HellyBelly · 14/08/2005 15:27

He already has one cup with his name on but no good.

There's loads of stuff he doesn't want and he has to have but this is defo something else. He actually looks scared and hides away and cries until they are gone, shaking a bit The day after I got all the cups out they were all away but one of my mindee's (I'm a childminder) wanted one of them. My ds saw it and pushed it away from him and acted scared again. He didn't seem as bad once it got through to him it was the mindee's cup.

?????? not sure why he's like this but promise it's not a 'trying it on' thing - he does enough of that and I can tell

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Tortington · 14/08/2005 17:23

oh its very strange - apart from a specific cup shopping trip with maybe a trip to wimpy or something - you know like a good day out - big boys cup picking day.

dunno - thats all i have sorry

Original poster

HellyBelly · 14/08/2005 17:31

custardo - defo going to try that. will have to be Friday as that's the only day I don't have other kids to look after! will make a really big fuss and tell him what we're doing (bit like the dummy) and hope it works! If not, do you think at this age it's ok to drop the milk at night altogether??

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Tortington · 14/08/2005 22:13

am presuming you mean cows milk not formula at 2.5 yrs - i think milk is very good full of vitamins and stuff - errrrrrrrrrrrr okay am gonna fess up - my kids are teenagers its been a while since i did this. feel a bit out of my depth - but i do know that milk =good things.

Original poster

HellyBelly · 15/08/2005 07:53

Hi custardo, yes I mean cows milk. I know milk is really good but I know ds will probably not drink out of his new cup straight away so wondered if it would be ok to maybe go without until he realises it's new cup or no milk??

This milk = good thing really confuses me as I've always believed it's really good so the more the better but then people commented on how much milk ds was drinking and saying it was because he was hungry. I actually disagree with that as believe me, he eats loads (good food) and I give him decent portions so I'd be very surprised if this is why ds wanted it so much. Makes me laugh as you can get milk tokens etc. to encourage milk to be drunk???

Anyway, just thought maybe it wouldn't harm him to go without until he realises his bottle has gone and isn't coming back?

Maybe he'll surprise me and switch no problem, that would be GREAT .

Once I've got the milk cup thing sorted, I hope to get him to try different cups as one day his is bound to go missing!

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mumtosomeone · 15/08/2005 08:05

cruel answer coming up......take away the bottle if you dont want him to have it. After a couple of tantrums refusing to drink etc he will give in as long as you dont!!
Take him shopping to choose himself a bigboys milk cup!

Original poster

HellyBelly · 15/08/2005 08:32

Will do! Will buy a cup on Friday (day off) and try it that night - at least it will be over the weekend so not so bad if don't get much sleep!

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mumtosomeone · 15/08/2005 09:06

all kids are different some drink loads some dont. You know if he is substituting food for milk or not and it seems he isnt so there you go!
Good luck withthe cup!!

Original poster

HellyBelly · 15/08/2005 09:07

Cheers!

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Original poster

HellyBelly · 26/08/2005 19:57

Right, didn't manage to go out to buy this cup until today as no car etc etc. Have this evening had great fun with ds sticking stickers on his new cup and he said he'd be drinking out of it and was excited. We ran upstairs and got him ready for bed sooo quick it was great, thought this would work. Have told him that he can have his Thomas Aquadraw he's been going on and on about if he's a big boy and drinks out of it. He agreed to all of it, threw his baby bottle away and was pleased to be a big boy. Milk heated up, he went on sofa to get ready with smile on his face and then it's the same NO LIKE IT He freeked and asked me to move it away and asked for another drink. I've told him it's the milk or nothing but he won't even put it in his mouth

Please tell me to keep the bottle in the bin!! If he remains as stubborn as he is about other stuff then he'll end up with no milk from now on.

Any advice??? Ok to have no milk????

Sorry, really upset now as he was so happy about it I thought it would work like getting rid of the dummy! Reckon he's ok to get rid of the bottle, just won't drink milk again

OP posts:

Tommy · 26/08/2005 20:00

haven't read rest of thread but I have a three and a half year old with a similar phobia so don't worry too much yet!
he will drink water out of a cup but his milk has to be out of his Avent beaker with spout.

Original poster

HellyBelly · 26/08/2005 20:03

well in short, he has to have his drinks out of one particular cup - same cup in different colour etc no good, milk has to be out of his bottle which now has a big whole so had to go.

maybe have to try and throw the other cup away now as he'd have to drink sometime. best to do it now I suppose as I'm a c/m and have the week off so can deal with it better.

Thanks for making me feel better - I was actually in tears until I read your post (silly I know but was so disappointed - so many people saying I can't have tried all these things!)

OP posts:

Tommy · 26/08/2005 22:33

Hellybelly

Many people have pointed out that he won't take a beaker with a spout to school with him..... so I have precisely one year to sort him out

Original poster

HellyBelly · 27/08/2005 08:54

Well, I'm feeling tough today so his beaker is going in the bin!!! Surely he's going to need to drink at some point???!!!

Not looking forward to it. Wish me luck

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bobbybob · 27/08/2005 08:57

Okay to have no milk for a few days at 2.5

Tell him his bottle is broken and he can't have it any more.

Papillon · 27/08/2005 09:03

Why does he need to drink out of a cup?

It has just become increasingly amusing to me the prescribed rituals we and baby experts have accorded upon ´how to drink´at what age.

Some kids when a younger baby comes along want bottles again.. just as long as they getting their fluids I don´t personally mind how it is delivered.

Original poster

HellyBelly · 27/08/2005 09:27

bobbybob - The bottle is in the bin now anyway as the hole is big and he could end up with part of the teet in his mouth IYSWIM.

Papillon - a) on very 'odd' occasion the cup has been left somewhere and we've had to drive all the way back to get 'that cup' (don't mind him having these types of cups at all but it has to be 'that' one!) b) I'm a childminder and have up to 5 kiddies cups around at times and he can't stand them being near him - he acts like he's scared! Just not nice situation - want him to be able to drink out of what cup he's given.

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Papillon · 27/08/2005 18:09

Funny how kids have colour favourites... dd is orange!

Thanks for the explanantion, therefore makes sense that you want him to be more flexible. Perhaps his cup is his territory because you look after after kids and a mine frontier.

Hope things were not too traumatic for you both today and he accepted fluids in another vessel.

Original poster

HellyBelly · 27/08/2005 20:01

I wish it was just a favourite colour thing but it's not, it's THAT cup for some reason. Certainly not to do with childminding either as only started on 4th July and he was like this before then - scared of the cups we tried him with Just happens to be more of a problem now as obviously those cups we bought are out more often.

The cup didn't go today for one reason or another, mainly because dh had already given it to him in the morning without me realising (he's been away) and I wanted to start a FRESH in the morning rather than confuse him by giving it to him then taking away IYKWIM - WILL be tomorrow though!!

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Original poster

HellyBelly · 28/08/2005 12:10

Well, it's in the bin and........so far today, no drink at all! Going to take him to a ball pit where he's going to get really thirsty and SURELY will give in!!?!

Wish me luck!

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Original poster

HellyBelly · 29/08/2005 13:34

Well, after all that running around he gave in and tried his drink at 2.15pm - he guzzled the whole cup in one go! He's now happy with this cup but still won't try others yet. This cup is same type as his other but different colour. Going to leave a while and try completely different cup in the same way, no cup no drink.

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