Neighbour swearing at my children, what would you do?

[laurasarah]

So my next door neighbour who has 2 grown up children keeps complaining about the noise from my children when they are in their own back garden.

Yesterday it came to a head and she called them Little F..... B......

Well as you can imagine I was not best pleased and when I got home from work went and knocked on her door to ask what the problem was. She says well its the screaming wtf! They are children I say what do you want me to do.

Anyway after a lot of shouting and swearing from her again I told her my house, my garden, my kids and she went balistic.

So where do I go from here?

Do I get the police involved or wait and see what happens?

police? to do what?

unless she threatened you?

How old are your kids?
Do they scream a lot?
Is there any particular time your neighbour would appreciate a bit of peace and quiet?

she swore at your children???? WTF indeed!

She sounds like a nasty piece of work. I would avoid her, and tell your children not to scream. That is annoying, but I wouldnt swear at your kids because of it.

You could contact the police, what your neighbour did is classed as "Anti social behaviour" just to have a record of it would be good, should this escalate, which it sounds like it might.

but you were at work?? then how did you know what she said?

think perhaps you should listen to your dc and see how much noise they DO make.

What ages are your children? Are they just playing and making normal levels of noise or are they very noisy? What times is this happening at - I think it's one thing if she is complaining about them playing at 3 p.m. in the afternoon, another thing perhaps if it is 7.30 in the morning. What have your relationships been like previously with this neighbour?

She best move then if she cant tolerate kids being kids and just playing. Rude woman !! Ignore her.
However if kids screaming is totally ridiculous, and goes on forever then maybe ask kids to keep noise down. . .??
Just a suggestion. . .i guess though you are so mad at neighbour kids can scream all they want now ?

HOw old are your children?

How do you know what the noise was like if you weren't there?

How noisy are they?(I don't let mine scream in the garden tbh - no need unless they are being murdered) A few squeals is fine.

What time was it?

No need for swearing but if you weren't there, how do you know that's what was really said?

Thanks everyone

Kids are 10 and 6. Its not so much screaming as just squealing with excitement and yes I have to admit it gets on my nerves and we have told them not to do it but.... kids being kids it goes in one ear and out the other.

We were getting the rabbits inside 5 mins before leaving for school at 8.30am but mostly its around teatime when they get home from school etc.

TBH this woman is a bit volatile and its not just me saying that other neighbours think so too and... I've had no other complaints from anyone else it just seems to be her!

Yes Maltesers I was very angry last night and told them to scream as much as they want. No but being serious I did tell them to stop the squealing a few times last night not loads.

I'm worried that next time she will not be so tolerant and will do something silly cos thats just the type of person she is.

Sorry, but whilst it's utterly unacceptable of your neighbour to swear at your DCs, would you say "kids being kids it goes in one ear and out the other" if they were caught shoplifting, despite you telling them not to?!?

FWIW I live in an area where all the DCs play out in the street and in their gardens, in the summer until as late as 9pm. They do not scream. Nobody complains.

If you weren't there how do you know what she said?

10 and 6....presumably they listen and retain do's and donts in school?

if it gets on your nerves then it will be getting on the neighbours nerves unfortunately. Not that that makes swearing at them acceptable.

I think at 10 and 6 they can understand that they need to keep the noise down.
Speak to the neighbour again, and find out exactly what the issues are.
She in the wrong to swear at them, but you all have to find a way to live in peace

Thanks TheBoyWith

Good point but I hardly think you can compare shoplifting with kids having fun!

Thats not to say I don't agree with you that they should not be screaming but short of muzzling them what can I realistically do? FFS I'm not going to bring them inside just because one particular person is unable to tolerate noise levels.

She seems to have real general issues surrounding noise levels though tbh and quite truthfully my attitude to this is if you dont like it go and live somewhere else cos what do you expect when you live on a family estate where there are lots of young children! The neighbours on the opposite side are equidistant to my garden but not they dont see it as a problem.

Am I being completely unreasonable?

You said it got on your nerves as well. So it's not just "one particular person" who can't tolerate the noise. What you can realistically do is impress upon your children the importance of not pissing off the neighbours be squealing in the garden.

Thanks Gerontius

I have and will impress upon them the importance of not pissing off "the neightbour" and yes one person and me and I have to put up with them 24/7 so just think how I feel! lol

I must impress on everyone at this point that my children are not unruly and I do discipline them but tbh I dont really notice them squealing cos to me the're just being kids or maybe as a mum I've just become immune!

But..... I take it I'm the only one who's kids squeal with excitement when they are playing.......... I don't think so!

I have a 10 year old and just turned 7 year old. While they can be noisy whilst playing in the garden, they tend not to scream or squeal very often. Occasionally when in the pool, but I dont let them yell their heads off - I have neighbours to consider (and my own sanity)

Children can play and make noise without screeching and squealing. It is about consideration for others really.