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Parenting

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Original poster

putting baby in her own room...

27 replies

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 14:52

my tot is 8 months and i havnt yet put her in her own room, she still stays in with us, i love having her in our room and it really terrifys me putting her elsewhere. also we have a problem where we cant get her to sleep at night unluess she falls asleep in our bed first then put her in cot, and she wakes up between 2 and 3 wanting in our bed, i try not to but sometimes im so tired i just bring her in to get a sleep!
i know this is wrong but its so difficult, how can i get her to sleep in her cot and in another room! should i try the crying method? x

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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lal123 · 09/06/2010 14:55

We were really surprised how easily DD2 (8 months) went down in her own cot. However shes stil waking in the night for a feed and so is still ending up in our bed from about 3am. Like you I think we SHOULD be leaving her to settle herself - but that's easier said than done when all you want is some sleep and you have another DC to think about.

So - no advice, just empathy!

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 14:58

not alone then lol, my other half hates it because he cant sleep in fear of rolling onto her or somthing, ive tryed leaving her in her cot for somtimes an hour in the middle of the night, she just lies there playing and babbling away, i bring her in and bang! shes out liek a light , little rascal, i dont mind having her in i love our little cuddles, but its only going to get worse i suppose the older she gets, is your little one in their own room? x

OP posts:

TaurielTest · 09/06/2010 15:04

It's not wrong to have your DD in your room or in bed with you for as long as you like, if that's what suits you
co-sleeping guidelines.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 15:06

really? im told by health visitor we shouldnt have her in our bed, easy for her to say but i love our snuggles, tryed that site but it was not available anymore?? xx

OP posts:

TaurielTest · 09/06/2010 15:06

Guidelines for safe co-sleeping
Sorry, mucked up the link.

Just saying, if you want her in a cot and in another room, fine, but don't feel that you "should". My DS is nearly two and still in with us, in a bedside cot (so in and out of our bed), which I'm sure some people think is weird, but we all get enough sleep and feel happiest that way.

TaurielTest · 09/06/2010 15:11

Some other info (babycentre).

Is your HV saying not to because she thinks it's dangerous (it's not if you follow the safety guidelines) or because she thinks it's a "bad habit" (matter of opinion!)?

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 15:13

she says it dangerous. that we could suffocate her, but we have a big king size bed and both me and my partner are wee lol, she has plenty room and not surrounded by pillows or nothing. i dont think its weird at all, id have her in my room net to me ifs she s16 if i had it my way lol x

OP posts:

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 15:14

just read that link, we seem to do all that its saying, so i think we are being safe, x

OP posts:

TaurielTest · 09/06/2010 15:23

Glad it helped, enjoy your snuggles

Disenchanted3 · 09/06/2010 15:25

glasgow, my daughter is 18 months and still sleeps with us, we are trying to get her in a cot, but will still be in my room, im not ready to put her in her own yet

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 15:27

wow, see i thought she HAD to go in her own room by 6 months so i thought i was leaving it late! bugger it then im leaving her where she is, im happier because its a small comfort having her lying in her cot next to me, or in my bed with me, i can sleep at ease, if she was in a nother oom, i couldnt sleep a wink! id feel bad for her all lonely in the other room x

OP posts:

Disenchanted3 · 09/06/2010 15:37

yey!

Disenchanted3 · 09/06/2010 15:38

PS, what the HVs say are just guidelines' and 'suggestions' you can do whatever you like (as long as its not something harmful of course!)

You know your baby best and if she is happy with you, and you are happy with her being there then all is good

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 15:41

hear hear! couldnt agree more x

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susitwoshoes · 09/06/2010 15:51

what about your DP though - you say he hates it and can't sleep? It's all very well saying if you are happy and the baby is happy - but doesn't he have a say? I would think that you ALL need to be happy with the situation - and then carry on for as long as you like

whatname · 09/06/2010 15:53

There is a lot of support for co-sleeping, but I have heard a lot of negativity about it.
Personally I couldn't have had our DS in the bed with us, although I have slept with him on my own on many an occasion.

If you don't feel ready to put her in a cot/room of her own, don't feel pressured, you know what's right.
But I would say that I think it's good for them to go down to sleep by themselves. It's a bit of a nightmare having a 3 year old who still needs you to cuddle in before he will go to sleep. I wish I had done it differently!!

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 15:55

thats what worried me, having problems in the future.. your right susit. its not that he hates it, i was a bit blunt there, hes justa bit paranoid, as am i somtimes, he just cant sleep very weel knowing shes in the middle, but to be fair we both dont sleep when shes in her cot awake for the most of the night before we bring her in, we cant win lol x

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ExitPursuedByABear · 09/06/2010 15:56

Go with what feels right for you. My DD slept with us for years, then just with me and DH in spare room. Just recently she had a bit of a scare and was in with me again (she is 10!) but has just (hurrah) gone back into her own bed and has not come into us in the middle of the night for the last three nights. But in reality, I love sleeping with her

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 16:00

i love it too, its just so nice, i love her cuddles with me, and she sleeps so soundly x

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AnathemaDevice · 09/06/2010 16:48

DS is 14 months and he's still in our room, but stopped co-sleeping at 12 months. He was similar to your DD, he would wake up in the early hours and refuse to go back to sleep unless he was in our bed. It was beginning to get a bit wearing, especially as he tends to sleep diagonally.

About 3 days before his first birthday something just clicked, and he started sleeping through the night- no sleep training, no CC, he just decided that his own bed wasn't so bad after all! He now wakes up anytime between 5 and 7am and comes in with us until I'm ready to face the world.

We've decorated his bedroom, but not quite got around to moving him into it- I don't think I'd be able to sleep without him next to me in his cot.

Basically, this is a long winded way of me saying I agree with everyone else who has said carry on as you are, and do what you feel is right.

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 09/06/2010 17:08

yeah im just not ready to let her go yet lol, i will when i feel the time is right and hopefully she will do the same and just start to sleep in her own bed, but until then ill just keep doing what makes her happy x

OP posts:

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 10/06/2010 09:30

well last night DD woke at 1.30 and i tryed leaving her for a bit, got to about an hour and she was still awake, just playing in her cot happily! but i resisted bringin her in and she slept well! but woke at 6 and i brought her in bed with us then for a cuddle, and she slept till 8.

i was so strong! and DP finally got a pretty decent nights sleep without her in between us. i thought i would just give it a try but it paid off, hopefully can do the same everynight,
still love my morning snuggles though!

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LauraKB · 10/06/2010 10:21

Glasgowmandy, I think you're right, if she is playing happily then leave her, she'll let you know if she needs you. Bringing her in at 6 if she wakes up sounds like the perfect compromise, x.

Original poster

glasgowmandy · 10/06/2010 10:26

lol thanks laura, i think i would have taken her out during the night if she was crying or upset but she was just playing with her feet and babbling to herself, i figured theres no need to take her out if shes happy, and it worked! yipee! x

OP posts:

WillbeanChariot · 10/06/2010 10:28

My little man (9 months) has just gone into his own room this week, I wasn't keen but DH convinced me to give it a try. It's only been four nights but he has slept right through for three of them! He wakes about 6:30 and DH brings him in to me before he goes to work so we atill get our cuddles and everyone's having a good night's sleep. Good luck hope it keeps going well.

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