i thought this would go away but it hasn't.

[booyhoo]

i know lots of MNetters have posted about this so please ignore if you feel you have heard it too many times.

i want more children. OH says no/ maybe,/not yet/ soon/ in a few years/ in 7 years depending on what mood he is in. i know his answer is really no but he says these other answers to pacify me and keep me quiet about it.

we have 2 boys, i just dont feel as if that is my lot yet. i am very grateful for my two lovely boys and i think i am a good mum, i get stressed like most mums but on the whole i really enjoy my children and i look forward everyday to doing things with them and just having that jovialty (sp?) in the house. i hate it when they are not here. i cant say for sure that i would be finished at 3. maybe i would just know then that it was enough for me but i know now that i am not finished. i tried to put it out of my head when OH initially said no but it has never gone away. i get pangs of jealousy when i hear of friends or family having more children. i know how stupid that is.

OH says we cant afford it, says wait til we have bought our first house (we are renting now). i have agreed that we could wait til then but then he changes his mind and says wait til he has left the Navy (he reckons about 9 years left there). then he changes his mind again and goes back to no.

i accept that he doesn't want any more children, i cant accept that i never will have any more. it hurts. i have cried so many tears over this both infront of him and in secret. i dont know how to make this go away.

Well..you could do what my friend did and leave her cap under the bathroom floorboards.I would love more but I'm 46 now,and I wish I'd got pregnant "accidentally on purpose" as the only reason I've had my babies so late is that DH,lovely though he is,dithered for years.I didn't do it as the above friend suggested as I wanted it to be a joint decision,but I've heard the persuasive aurgument that babies are women's business,and i am swayed by that!

i will not trick him into this. i have told him i am not taking any contraception and will not be taking any so it is up to him if he doesn't want anymore. every month when AF comes i am gutted. i just wish i didn't feel like this.

Well the only consoling things can think of are a)that you probably still have years for him to change his mind,I've had both mine in my 40s, and b)there is a part of me that thinks I would have always yearned for just one more,however many I'd had,and at some point I would have had to accept that there wouldn't be another.

I felt the same I have a ds and a dd but as I was a only child I always wanted a big family. We cant have more than three dp has agreed because he doesn't like seeing me crying, but now I feel like I have forced him into it.