Are prams necessary?

[waitingimpatiently]

Sorry but I didn't know where else to post this.

DPs mum is meant to be buying us the pram and the other day she asked him if we really needed one?
I thought this was a silly question but he seems to be taking her side. He said that we could just lug baby around in the car seat (which I know I couldn't do) or in a baby carrier (which I don't really fancy either).
She has the money for it, I think she's just being funny.

DP and I are not going to be out together often so if I went out on my own with baby I don't think I could cope without a pram. To be honest, it was the one thing I was looking forward to getting new because everything else is pretty much second hand.

I was just wondering if anyone else had managed without one? And how difficult / easy it was?

Thanks guys

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Hello,

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Oh, and once your DC is a toddler, unless you have the patience of a saint, and always leave at least 30 mins to do a 10 min walk, you will sometimes just want to strap them in a pushchair and get going! In theory I am trying to encourage my DD (23 months) to walk everywhere, but in practice I sometimes just need to get from A to B without stopping at every car number plate / shadow / gate / piece of litter on the floor and other items attractive to todders, and the pushchair is essential.

PS NormalityBites - what sling do you use with your toddler?

Do consider a second hand pram though - I understand what you are saying about wanting something new but you can get really good bargains on prams that are in fab condition, plus it's not so bad then if you do decide to trade it for a lightweight buggy at 6 months!

I had a LOT of backache after my first labour (otherwise rated as relatively quick and uncomplicated), no way I could have got by without a pram of some sort, I could not have put the baby weight on my back or front in the first 3 months.

I could barely lift the car seat when my son reached 7 months, never mind carry him around in it.

I've only scan read the responses, so I may repeat things already said

I did enjoy my baby bjorn with both my babies a lot, but after a while as they get bigger it makes your shoulders hurt. So I then moved to an Ergobaby one and still use it now with the 16 month old little man. However there are some amazing slings and wraps about instead.

As for prams, I had a silvercross one that starts with the baby lying flat in a lovely cozy, soft inerior that's removable and facing you and then it converts to a buggy when older and they face the other way. It was fab with both of mine. So suitable for a baby and a toddler. Heavier than a McLaren though but very handy to do baby and older infant.

I always liked the idea of certain baby car seats clipping onto a frame with wheels, so you could leave them in the car seat if asleep and not wake them and just clip into the frame on wheels instead (totally escapes me what the proper name is)

Carrying a car seat long distances is hard work, even when teeny.

I suppose you could manage without a pram, by why should you?

I could not have coped without a pram or buggy. DS hated the sling and I don't drive! I walked a lot with him as a baby and fetched shopping. I think you know if you need one or not. Carseats are not easy to carry for any real distance.

If it's your first baby, get a pram and enjoy it, esp at this time of year.
Your MIL is probably just at the price because she hasn't looked at the price of prams since they cost ninepence or something.

We got a Silver Cross Freeway, £300 new, and I love it. Mother gave us £200 towards it. Although we go most places by car, I take DD for a little walk in the pram most days and she always looks so snug, and falls asleep.

Seeing her bare-legged, kicking about in her pram with the parasol on while I was pushing her in the park last week just made me so so happy.

Slings aren't really for me.

I agree with most previous posters, I could not have coped at all without a pram. I got a mothercare 'my4' and it has been a lifesaver- I had a bad back after pregnancy and DS is a big boy! Slings are great but unless you are seriously into then you'll need a pram too. Not to advertise but I really recommend the pram I have- suitable for tiny babies and toddlers, parent facing if you like and really light. Pretty good value too. Whichever one you get you're likely to use it all the time... The vast majority of people find slings difficult after the first few months for long distances. And, as has been said, carrying a car seat is a nightmare for even short distances!

Widgeon - a Didymos woven wrap

I really, really don't agree that most people would struggle to carry a baby/toddler/even preschooler in a sling. It's fine if they are not for you, you don't want to ever, or only occasionally, but it is honestly not at all my experience nor that of any sling user I know (full or part time) to struggle. Quite the opposite, they most often sing the praises of slings as being incredibly freeing and practical, making children feel weightless.

Sling your kid up and off you go - and for the patience of a saint toddler walks, off you go and ten minutes later when patience is extinguished, open your handbag, swing them up and off you go at adult pace. When toddler gets back down the sling is back in the bag.....easy.

I'm not actually suggesting you get a sling, OP, you get whatever you want to get that suits you but I have to stick up for the poor sling with the bashing it is taking on this thread.

i would love to be able to carry ds every where in sling, but i can't find one that doesn't make me sweat, or my back hurt after a while. And all the yorkshire sling meets are places i can't get a bus to.

I needed one as i got frustrated lugging baby and changing bag everywhere. Ds has reflux so required lots of changes of clothes. Now he is on solids no idea how i would carry food etc around without it.

I still do carry him, but he won't sleep in sling now, so he just gets grouchy. I also found there was an awkward phase where he couldn't sit in highchair in cafes, but didn't want to be squished against me while i had a coffee.

Roslily I asked my spies and there is a slingmeet in Leeds city centre (city museum cafe) on 12th June at noon which repeats monthly on the second saturday.

I found a pram an absolute necessity. I love to go out walking/for coffee/lunch etc. I also used a sling a lot. But eating a warm meal/drinking a cup of coffee with baby in a sling never worked for me. Also when you're always holding the baby it is nice sometimes to have your hands free to eat/do nothing! Carrying a baby everywhere in a car seat is a ridiculous suggestion. They souldn't be in a car seat for long at all when young. Also baby's do get heavy quite quickly. I would be if anyone had suggested that I could manage without a pram! Maybe you/someone could split the cost of the pram a bit if that's the problem? What will your mil carry baby in when she has him/her? And your dh?

I couldn't have managed without a pram and currently debating my options for number 2.

Great for getting them to nap if they are reluctant nappers and for pushing round the supermarket.

My main gripe is that the ones suitable from birth aren't really suitable for me - I am tall and need long handles and still haven't located one yet for use this time. Still looking.

Why don't you get second hand or one with good potential resale value?

I am genuinely surprised that people haven't ever had a pram!

For DS2, I am reusing the same travel system (car seat / flat pram / buggy seat) that we had for DS1, 3 years ago. If you have any thoughts of more than one DC, get a pram/buggy - much better ROI!

We bought that from an independant retailer - and because it was an ex-display model, got a good deal. Maybe you can take a look somewhere else and see if you could get some kind of reduction? Alternatively, Kiddicare do sales quite often, so if you are not that hung up on make/colour etc, you could get something well priced. You probably don't need the pram (ie the flat, lying down only bit) but wheels of some description are necessary, IMO.

Are DH and MIL prepared to lug around the car seat themselves? Or how else are they planning to carry the baby? You will be doing most of the ferrying about, so I really think you have the final say on this. I had to walk with 4 month old between 2 shops in his car seat the other day - a matter of a few hundred years. I thought my arms were going to drop off...

I walk a lot so couldn't do without a pram, which is now converted to a pushchair. I also used a sling when I was at home, but can't use it very often now as my son is getting bigger and heavier. For me, pram/pushchair is essential.

You do need the flat bit though - babies need to lie flat for the first few months. I hate seeing little ones slumped in buggies or stuck on carseats. Most decent prams/buggies have the lie back facility though.

It is one thing to decide you don't want a pram because you are a committed babywearer and another thing to be pushed into it by a tight dh.

I hardly ever used a pram for dd, finding it easier to have her in a wrap, but there are times I do find it useful. Especially now that she is bigger, I sometimes want to cover a lot of ground quickly without having to carry her.

I was really concerned about DD being in the carseat for more than an hour (ideally) or two (max) before I'd have her lying flat for some time. I have a slight scoliosis of the spine and have read physio's and others are very concerned about the longterm impact of babies going everywhere in carseats, especially the ones that attach so easily to buggies or into trolleys tempting longer and longer hours out in them when tiny.

I also read there are some concerns about how deeply a baby can breath given the squashed nature of sitting rather than lying when newborn. Can they still breathe from the base of the lungs fully and will a link develop to SIDS in the future - research is ongoing but the back issues were enough for me to leave our carseat in the car and make myself transfer DD to a flat cot part of the pram. She really didn't wake much or fuss if she did wake so I never found it a burden to do - we were always moving again once she was in the pram so she just drifted back to sleep if need be.

I think carseats are ideal for a car crash position but not for day to day - slings are different and obviously they vary too in how they suit different baby and parent shapes and support.

Just another argument you might want to use to support you not relying on the carseat as some magic baby carrying alternative to a flat pram/pushchair or supportive sling!

DS got too hot, I got too hot, and I found it very hard to regulate his temp in a sling (partic going in and out of shops, say) - it's far easier to add or remove blankets than clothing in the early days. And this was for an autumn baby - summer would have been dreadful.

I do see the benefits of sling use but there is no way I would've gone without a pram. Lol at carrying a baby around in a carset though!

No way could I/would I have managed without pram.

We bought and iCandy travel system, with carrycot (which DD was in for about 6m as she was quite small), carseat attachment (fantastic, but only for short trips) and reversible pushchair bit for when she outgrew the carrycot. I don't drive, so the pram was ideal for walking around town (I did/still do a lot of walking as DD is a crap napper), it's handy for shopping (decent size basket) and is still light and easy to push. No way can you carry a baby around in a carseat, it will weigh a ton in a very short space of time

If you don't have a carrycot type pram then you'll need somewhere for the baby to sleep anyway so if things are tight space and money wise you might as well combine the 2. I also found there were deals on the car seat which goes with the pram, that brought the price down too.
From what you've mentioned about your lifestyle in brief the Britax range might be of interest, they are good quality and not too flashy/pricey.

Oh and I have a sling too but that's for when we have days out like galleries and museums with the older children, certainly not instead of.

NOrmalitybites - thanks - I would also like to sing the praises of wrap slings - I loved my Moby Wrap and so did my DD when she was a baby- maybe I should try again now she's a toddler. Tried a friend's one-shoulder sling recently with DD and she felt very heavy. The Didymos looks pretty similar to the Moby and so prob much more comfy as it's on both shoulders.

Didn't want you to feel that you were the only sling-lover on the thread!

I have to disaggre with other posters you don't absolutly need a pram. We had a Sliver Cross 3D, which is very similar to the Mamas and Papas Pilk Pramette. We only used it in the pram Mode undtill DD was 8 week's as she hated lying flate due to reflux. I think these type of prams are a much better option then one with a seperat carrier which are normaly much more expensive. I would have felt like I'd wasted my money if we'd have bought a proper pram.

A lie flat puschair and baby carrier is all you really need, one that you can attch the car seat to mite be usefull but we acctuly hardly used that feature. I carried DD in a strechy wrap untill 6 months on shourt trips and used the pushchair for long walks. The thing is everybaby is different and if you get an expensive pram and find baby doesn't like it you'll feel like it's been a waste.