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Skin loving 4 year old

6 replies

L0zza · 30/05/2010 22:46

Hello all,

4 yo DD was one of those babies who took great comfort in shoving her hand down the front of people's tops! Somebody told me it was because she was breastfed and that she'd grow out of it once breastfeeding stopped. Well, the breastfeeding was jacked in on her 1st birthday, but she never grew out of it. By the time she was 2, I had started removing her hand when she did it, and it's been a long road, but now that she is 4, she has mostly stopped as she knows she is not allowed to do it and I have told her that people don't like it. However, she still loves to stroke and caress skin, and will usually attempt to stroke arms or neck when she comes for a cuddle - I also discourage this, and of late have told her that if she does it, she must get down from my lap. My problem is that she doesn't just do it to Mummy, but to anyone that she is hugging or cuddling, and I am now worried she'll do it to school friends as she is starting school in Sept (I had expected to have another year before she went to school as we live in a country where they usually go at 5, but circumstances dictate that she is probably going to have to go at 4). Anyway, we're working on it and trying to be as firm but as sensitive as we can. Has anyone else come across this habit at the grand old age of 4, and what did they do about it? And to anyone else with a groping baby, I'd recommend that you nip it in the bud earlier than I did!

Thanks!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
slushy06 · 30/05/2010 22:54

Ds age 4 does this was fed till 2.9 no tips on how to stop it though he actually did it too a teacher she thought it was funny though he is getting better we have just ignored it.

wizbitwaffle · 31/05/2010 16:08

This reply has been deleted

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Glitterandglue · 01/06/2010 13:51

Sorry, no real direct experience of this but it has made me giggle a bit so thought I'd try and be helpful! Can you try to channel it into a more acceptable way of touching skin somehow?

I'm thinking of a boy I used to know in primary school - right up to the age of ten or eleven, if ever he sat next to you, he'd suck his thumb with one hand and flick your earlobe with the other. Not hard, just like soft back and forth. Sounds a bit weird...it would make you start sometimes if you weren't expecting it but generally it was fine and you just sort of ignored it. Nobody got annoyed with him over it if I recall correctly, it was just what he did.

Shrugs Sorry, that's the best I've got!

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slushy06 · 02/06/2010 10:14

I am bumping this up because I would like a answer I don't want ds teacher to have her boobs mauled by both my dc , DD appears to be going the same way.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 02/06/2010 15:22

This may be a weird response, but does it matter if she does stroke peoples skin? She is only wee, and adults would probably think it was cute, and her peers will probably just accept it. She will grow out of it when she becomes more socially aware. Seems sad to stop her expressing affection through touch

Gubbins · 02/06/2010 17:11

My daughter is four next month and if on my knee or having a carry will invariably have her arm down her top and be tweaking my nipple. I've started to be stricter about this in the last month or so and she now knows that it's for home only, not when we're out and about.

I'm sure your daughter would be able to reign it in if you explain that the stoking and touching should be kept for family, not for friends.

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