Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

Original poster

How do you get rid of the bottles?

24 replies

JennyPenny23 · 14/05/2010 19:46

My DDs are 1 and 2 and both still have a bottle of milk when they go to bed, and one or 2 in the night. I know they shouldn't be still having them so please don't lecture me on that score (sorry just having a bad day).

I am more concerned about DD1 as she is just so attached to her milk/bottle. I have tried giving her milk in a beaker and she just won't drink it. I can't get her to sleep without milk and her and DD2 share a room so if one is screaming the place down, they wind each other up so much and its a nightmare.

I am worried about
a) Nobody getting any sleep for weeks
and
b) that if she can't have her bottle of milk in bed then she won't drink milk at all and will be missing it out of her diet?
c) It is just so upsetting when she screams for it. I am good at ignoring tantrums if she is just being a stroppy toddler, but she really really loves her bottle of milk and I think she will be really upset for weeks.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Original poster

JennyPenny23 · 14/05/2010 20:40

I just don't know how to go about it. With DD2 I can just do it. But DD1 will want an explanation (And the big girl thing doesn't work with her at all with anything) and I am not sure what to tell her? And if to do it gradually or just go cold turkey one night? Do I get rid of all bottles, meaning she couldn't have the option of water in bed instead, or get rid of all milk, meaning she couldn't have it in a beaker?

OP posts:

mrsflux · 14/05/2010 20:43

I've just started with ds. He's 1.
Thus moring I gave milk in beaker as usual with breaky then instead of putting left overs into bottle I gave him rest in beaker.
I gave afternoon milk in beaker too.

No problems just a boy who enjoys pouring his left over milk onto the carpet.

didn't try bedtime bottle though.

Could you try swapping dd2 first. Dd1 would want to look more grown up than little sis so may be more receptive??

It was a lot less painful than I thought.

Rockbird · 14/05/2010 20:43

Well if people are going to make you feel bad they'll have to judge me first. DD is 2.4yo and has her bottle all day. It's her comfort 'blanket' and any time I've tried to get rid of it, she is beside herself, really distressed. I do have a go at trying to go without it every so often but mostly I don't worry about it, she really really loves it and that counts for more than what other people think.

So I have no advice I'm afraid but you're not the worst!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

Original poster

JennyPenny23 · 14/05/2010 20:50

Rockbird - DD1 is the same age.

The main issue is sleep time - she has it in bed with her as she falls asleep (yes I am also aware this isn't recomended).

The main reason I want to get rid of the bottles is that I think thats the only way either of them will learn to sleep through the night . And i never imagined still getting up in the night with a 2 year old to give her milk

I AM TIRED AND WANT A FULL NIGHTS SLEEP!

OP posts:

PrettyCandles · 14/05/2010 20:53

Break the challenge down into smaller sections. The bottles themselves are the least important.

Firstly: waking at night for a drink of milk. My instinct would be to still let them have a bottle, but of water not milk. If they make a fuss, be very bland about it. Don't get upset, just say something like "milk is for daytime. Now it's nighttime". You may need to do a bit of stroking and comforting, but don't get them out of bed to do it.

Hopefully they will learn to resettle with just the stroking and eventually not bother waking if they only get water.

Do they wake each other up in the night? Do you deal with both of them at the same time, or do you have several wakings dealing with one of them at a time?

Rockbird · 14/05/2010 20:53

Is it the milk or the bottles? DD is a milk monster but I replace the bottle once she's asleep with a small amount of water or just an empty bottle. It's the bottle she wants in the middle of the night rather than what's in it. But yes, she wakes me up when the bottle gets lost in the duvet. (we still co-sleep, how bad a mother am I?!)

Original poster

JennyPenny23 · 14/05/2010 21:13

They wake at seperate times and don't usually wake each other up, unless I am really tired and don't wake up straight away So I usually have to get up 2+ times and have been up once already tonight to refil DD1s bottle with warm milk.

Gosh I have just realised I probably haven't had a full night sleep in over 3 years

OP posts:

Original poster

JennyPenny23 · 14/05/2010 21:17

She wants warm milk in a specific bottle. It has to be perfect temperature and she won't have anything other than tommie tippee bottles. TBH I can't see water being accepted at all but would like to offer it incase she is actually thirsty.

Thank you all for all your help.

OP posts:

Spatchadoodledo · 14/05/2010 21:20

We had a chat to DS1 at around 18mths saying he was a big boy now (not sure how much he took in though considering his age!! LOL)

Then we gave then the milk, but in a cup, on the couch. Basically we just introduced a new step to the bedtime wind down routine. It was a 'treat' to watch 5 mins of cartoons on the couch before bed, then teeth, then tucked in and goodnight. If they got up or fussed aobut it we just reminded them they had their milk earlier, but as they ha a full tummy it wasnt such a big deal iyswim?

it took a few nights, but less then a week and we were done!!

Dont know if this will help at all but just thought I would share.

IMoveTheStars · 14/05/2010 21:23

OP - try a special open-topped cup.

We tried loads of spouted cups for DS, but nothing worked. Maisy plastic glass with a straw is his favourite cup (very special as he calls it)

with the 1yo, tesco and boots have a silicone tipped tommee tippee cup which is a really good inbetween sippy cup (non spill, but not a stupid valve either bottom 2 on this link

PrettyCandles · 14/05/2010 21:24

Ugh you have my commiseratuons. Once I would secretly have judged, but that was when I had (non-standard) sleeping babies. Then I had ds2 and - boy! - did I learn my lesson!

I thought from your OPs that they were just waking fir a feed, but now I'm getting the impresion that they're using the bottles as dummies. Is that the case? If so, then replacing milk with water may not help. Tho still worth trying I think.

If they're using the bottles as dummies, then i think you've got no choice but to cold turkey and take them away entirely during the night. Daytime bottles really not important. Start with nightimes. When that's cracked then think about turning bedtime bottle into a bedtime drink takensitting up.

IMoveTheStars · 14/05/2010 21:25

also agree with what other people have said -let your 2yo have a bottle at night, but only for water. You could try night weaning first to break the milk habit.

PrettyCandles · 14/05/2010 21:27

Have a look at The No Cry Sleep Solution by Someonorother Pantley (I think). It has many good ideas on how to change sleep cues.

Sorry no link, but my connection is v slow and wd provbably crash if I opened another window.

InTheZenGarden · 14/05/2010 21:35

This probably isn't going to help, but thought I'd share what happened for me.

DD was 18 months, we were about to go on holiday for a month, and I was dreading taking loads of bottles (and having to wash them all the time). She would drink out of a beaker during the day, but not first thing in the morning or at bedtime (we were lucky, no night-time feeds)

Anyway, we had a weekend away at my parents' house, and this change in location and routine allowed me to give her a beaker one morning, instead of her bottle - she saw my parents' cat, and got so excited by this, she didn't really notice that she didn't have a bottle. I did the same thing the next morning and then decided to chance it in the evening and give her a beaker (with a bottle hiding outside the door, just in case!!)
Anyway, it worked, and we never looked back I even managed to get her off milk and onto water after a while, as it was less of a comfort thing than a bottle - she has her milk with breakfast and dinner now, so she only has water after she's cleaned her teeth, which is something I was concerned about.

Anyway.... sorry, long rambling post, I guess I'm suggesting that if maybe you are going on holiday/away anywhere, that a new situation/exciting events of the day to discuss/remember might be enough of a distraction?
Fingers crossed for you

Cazwa · 14/05/2010 21:36

This is very familiar to me as I had DD1 and DS2 who both loved their bottles, 1 year age gap and slept in the same room. However Im buggered if I can recall what I did to sort it out! Here goes. Im pretty sure I went cold turkey on the nighttime bottles with DD1 (think I gave her water in a cup?) and never gave DS2 bottles in the night for very long having learnt my lesson with first one.

When I went cold turkey with bottles at bedtime DD1 went mad for a few evenings refusing a cup then gave in as she loves her milk. DS2 went mad when it was his turn to give up but never had milk ever again after this, hasnt had a drop to this day other than in cereal! Makes me think its definitely the bottle and not the milk. Not worried about his diet as he has lots of cheese and yoghurt.

We made sure their routine of having a bottle was to have it with bedtime stories then brush teeth, before getting into bed.

I know its hard, and I loved seeing how happy mine were with their bottles. But in the end I was sick of washing them and very glad to see the back of them.

Original poster

JennyPenny23 · 14/05/2010 21:43

Thanks again for replies.

Its not that they can't use a beaker, they do in the daytime, its just a comfort thing for bed.

They don't have milk in the day, except when they have a daytime nap they have it in bed like they do at night.

They don't use them as dummies. DD1 drinks her milk in bed and when its all gone she cuddles the milk bottle and sucks her thumb, and also has a comfort toy she takes to bed. DD2 drinks her milk and then has a dummy when she is finished with it.

OP posts:

Original poster

JennyPenny23 · 14/05/2010 21:56

Cazwa - yes I am sick of them too!

OP posts:

PrettyCandles · 14/05/2010 22:23

Sounds so very sweet! But what's sweet at bedtime is definitely not as sweet at 2am!

I think tha the bedtime bottles are probably fine, but that you will have go c old turkey on nightimes. They have a different comforter, they don't need the milk to resettle. They just don't know that yet.

It will probably mean a knackering week or so for you, but will be worth it in the long run.

Rockbird · 14/05/2010 22:32

See DD absolutely uses them as dummies. She uses these so not quite baby bottles but might as well be. She has about 4-5 bottles of milk (half water but she doesn't know that!) per day but if I refuse her water she will sit and suck the empty bottle. I tried dummies but she was never interested. I'm not fussed about her having them at night, it's during the day that bugs me but she gets so upset without it

Rockbird · 14/05/2010 22:33

I mean if I refuse her milk of course, would never refuse water!

Original poster

JennyPenny23 · 15/05/2010 08:04

Well last night DD1 woke about 1am and I didn't give her milk (Had been up in the evening with one and I told her this was the last one of the night). She kicked off for about 5 mins but then just wanted some cuddles. BUT that then trigged DD2 off, who had actually already settled down with no milk 20 mins before hand. But DD2 then wouldn't sleep and we had crying etc for about 45 mins - I just kept going in and giving her dummy, lying her down etc. She was happy if I stroked her hair, but I just can't do it leaning over the cot - my back aches far too much. But that was it for the night so going to carry on tonight. Going to fill their bedtime bottles right to the top and warn them that will be the only one they are getting. DH is back tonight though, who never agrees with me and will probably just give them a bottle

OP posts:

PrettyCandles · 15/05/2010 17:32

Oh well done! That sounds a really good first night, having only 3 wakings between them, and being able to resettle them without bottles.

Normally I'd say to have your dh shoulder his share of the night wakings during this stage. But the first night having gone so well suggests that you could crack this fairly quickly, so if you think he is likely to undermine you it mght be a good idea to tell him you will do the night wakings for the time being.

With dd2, would it help top stroke her head through the cot bars, rather than reaching over them?

Original poster

JennyPenny23 · 15/05/2010 19:26

I can't get to where DD is properly because of the room layout. And TBH if i sit with one of them, the other gets upset.

I have put them to bed tonight with a big bottle of milk, very tired. DD1 has since asked for more but I said no and she was fine with that. Explained she is only going to have the one bottle now and she seems fine with it!

HOPEFULLY we are making progress and it shouldn't be too stressful!

OP posts:

choufleur · 15/05/2010 19:31

DS bottles broke (all of them over night one day). not long after he was potty trained during the day. i didn't want him drinking loads at night and stopping him getting dry at night.

He did make a fuss for a couple of nights and refused milk and water in a beaker. But after that he was fine and just has a bit of water in a beaker when he goes to bed.

Flip