About to have "birds and bees" chat with nrarly 7 yr old - how do i stop him telling the whole class?

[luckyJess]

Ok...DS spotted the Mummy laid an egg book in the draw (had bought it in advance) and am going to look at it with him later.

We have gone along the "special cuddle" route before and he knows you need a man and a Lady to make a baby etc etc, but he doesnt know the exactly what happens!

Now, I know many children already know at this age, but I know for a fact that his close friends dont and maybe other kids in his class too.

My problem is Ds a gossip! He is very chatty and always earwigging etc and I am pretty sure he will be spreading this new information.

Now, do I ask him to keep quiet and say that its a mummy or daddy's job to tell their children or do I say nothing. I am worried that asking him to say quiet would reinforce the notion that its a "secret" and I dont want him thinking its something to be ashamed of etc etc.

Not sure if any if that make sense????

I went to a talk recently by this woman. She suggested saying something along the lines of what you're suggesting - that it's an important subject and parents like to talk about it with their own children - not that it's a 'secret'.

She also pointed out that the main source of information on sex for many children is their peers. So it's better if they learn it from a child who knows the facts than one who's overheard a whispered conversation between adults.

Thanks for your fast reply and good advise. Good point that they learn alot from their peers.

Hmm I'm in a similar position - DS1 found the 'Where do I come from?' book that I had borrowed from a friend and was thinking about showing him (contains full-on info about penetration and orgasms...) and read the whole thing. He actually hasn't mentioned anything about it since so I was taking the head-in-sand approach, but I very much doubt that many of his peers know as much as he now does (assuming he found the book in any way credible). Would be interesting to know what others think.

Opps.. ADVICE!

Probably true rubyrubyruby!!

My dd told everyone - don't think anyone minded. And if they did, I am afraid that I take the view that a 6 year old ought to know the basic facts because if you are old enough to pick up misinformation, you are old enough to know the real information.

I dunno. But my kids haven't spilt the beans to anyone as far as I know, but then it's never been presented as a Big Deal, just something we've talked about casually. If you tell him not to say anything though, you can pretty much guarantee he will IMO!!

I go along the line of saying that there are some things we talk about just at home, not in school. 6-yo DD1 has a fair knowledge about how babies are born and is starting to enquire about how they get there in the first place So, I've told her she can ask/tell DH and I anything she wants, and we will always answer (though sometimes DH struggles with my policy of absolute honesty).However, she shouldn't discuss this at school as her friends should talk to their mummies and daddies about it.

We're taking the same approach about drugs - some child in her class has been spouting on about drugs (I suspect a certain mother should take care where her 6-yo is before she goes off on one about the neighbours ) which confuses DD1 as DH and I are medical researchers and use the word 'drugs' properly, not just in regard to illegal/recreational substances. So, we've had some chats about it and I've suggested she doesn't talk about it in school. I must remember to let the teacher know so she can be prepared too....