What do you do when your dc isn,t that keen on friends dc

[selphy]

Hi
I have wanted a mom friend for years to spend time with taking our dc's down the park or taking our dc's to clubs etc.
My ds is an only and I feel that this is what we have boht been lacking for many years. I am quite a shy person myself.
I have struck up a friendship with another mom at ds's school our dc's are both 9 although not in the same class.
Her dc is also an only so I have tried to encourage a friendship between her ds and mine.
However whenever I have arranged anything with them ds plays up saying that he doesn,t like her ds and doesn,t want to go but if I ignore and go anyway ds is generally okay with this lad although I can tell he isn.t that much into him given the choice he would pick someone else to go with although I have not clicked with their moms the way I have with this lads mom.
Am I being unreasonable to pursue this as I really like the mom and ds does play with the lad once together most of the time.
This lad is a little geeky I know thats cruel and I have heard a couple of ds's other friends mention this to him so not sure if ds is a little influenced by others.
I don,t think that ds and this lad really bother with each other that much at school.
So what do you think.

I must also mention that ds can be very awkward when it comes to friendships liking somebody one minute then hating them the next.

At 9 years old I think he is old enough to choose his own friends and possibly a little past the "play date " stage. IME the days of mums and children on joint social outings ended when they were under 7.
I have found that you cannot make children enjoy each others company if they don't gel.
If he does have other friends then I would encourage him to invite the child round to play but would not expect mum to join in .
Maybe you could meet up with this woman while the children are at school?

Agree with the others: at 9, he needs to be in charge of his own social life (though obviously old enough to be polite to other children if their families are invited into his house as your guests).

I have a 9yo ds too, and I really can't see myself making his friends for him- any more than I'd expect him to manage my social life, even if he did think I looked lonely.

I found that once they got to about 6 yrs it was impossible to expect to manage their friendships. Leave it to DS and see the friend without your DCs.