AIBU when DH compares our DS to a friend's child?

[Bagabee]

Really irritated - DH visiting friends on a weekend away (while I stay at home looking after DS) and says their DD can make animal noises and perhaps we should do more 'of that kind of stuff' with our DS. Feel really undermined - and when I said so, he just said 'oh, for God's sake' on the phone in front of his friends. Why can't he be more supportive / see all the effort am putting in??

Men don't think like we do. You know that your are putting a lot of effort into rearing your ds. You know that you are doing enough to stimulate him - why seek validation from your dh for this? You are never going to have his support a 100%, because he does not see half of the things you teach your ds.

Do what I do: When he comes up with one of those 'we should do more 'of that kind of stuff' lines, just say "wow, what a great idea - I'll definitely look into that!" - then do absolutely NOTHING about it and carry on as you always do with your ds.

Ha! You're so right. He just doesn't get it - men are so simple sometimes...

or - "maybe we should - you go right ahead, dear"

ARGHHHH! Bagabee, no advice but just to say that I feel your pain so will be watching this thread with interest. My DH does exactly that and it drives me up the wall.

or how about a more appropriate 'well I do plenty of stuff like that thanks - how about you then??'

How about you suggest your DD listen to him snoring, which will teach her pig noises?

(Or maybe I'm thinking about my own DH there ).

I'd say humour is the way to go. Failing that, as NinaJane says, say "yeah, fantastic idea...", then ignore it. That's what I tend to do.

Yes my DH does this too but not just in relation to parenting. He regularly suggests that 'we' need to do more of things that I already do loads of but he doesn't (for example apparently 'we' need to clean the bathroom more because 'we' never do it. Erm, no I do it regularly, YOU don't).

Sorry sidetracked . I always reply now with 'yes thats a great idea, you sort that out then' and he gets really irritated. Its great

Or 'I do that already, don't you?'

Text back saying "oh, that's a FANTASTIC idea, I don't know why I didn't think of it before, I am so ashamed how our DS has been missing out all this time on such a key aspect of his development, I will get onto it right away darling".

Although, TBH I don't see he did much wrong, I say things like that to DH (so and sos child does this, that and the other) but I don't mean it to be "therefore you are a shit parent", it's just general observation/chit chat/ideas/almost competition? Well, wanting our child not to miss out, I see children do things DSs age I had no idea they 'could do' - like martial arts already, or football lessons etc. One of those things.