Do you eat dinner with your children?

[Gillian76]

Until now we normally feed the children around 5 and have our own dinner later. I have been reading a really interesting book about children's eating habits and the author is quite adamant that children should eat with their parents if they are to learn good eating habits.

Do you do this? How do you manage?

We usually have dinner about 6.30 to 7pm.DH is usually in by then. MIL thinks its very strange as they have dinner at 4.40pm 10mins after FIL comes home from work . She wonders why FIL is munching on cheese and biscuits by 8pm.

I think its the Italian in me but I like as many as possible aroung table and can be there for 3hrs. Kids go to bed at 9pm on school night though. It is harder with toddlers and we did eat a bit earlier but had supper together before they went to bed.

We do try to eat together. It's not at all easy with a 2 year old, but he has had quite a bit of trouble weaning to table food, and I think eating alone contributed to that. So, we just try to muddle through it the best we can.

We always eat together is possible, as did my family when I was a child. When dh hasn't been home I've still eaten with the children - I regard it as a social activity and wouldn't want them to eat alone.

But reading at the table when eating alone - I haven't had the chance to do that for years! It seemed v decadent, somehow.

yes - always eat together - but if dp works late his gets put in oven. Think it promotes good eating habits as he eats well and dont have any concerns and he eats very healthily too. My sister doesnt eat with her 3 and interestingly dinnertimes always seem a battle ground (actually dinner times were a battle ground when i was a child and just me and my sisters ate together - wonder if it is more diff with more than one child?)

oh and we eat at table - no tv as anti social. Manage it by aiming for tea time for 5.45 - 6pm.

We eat dinner between 6 and 7pm.

We try to eat together. Hubby works odd hours so he doesnt always manage it. In the holidays when routine changes we try to eat together but its about 7 so I feed ds3 earlier then he grazes with us if he is still up!

We can't do this during the week as dh doesn't get home till 7:30-8:00 just when my boys (7 & 4) are going to bed, so dh and I eat together.

But we always all eat together at the weekend.

Everyone who is awake in the house eats together at every meal. Always been a very important rule to me (more important than what you eat IMO). But I think it will be a long time before we all eat dinner together. We usually eat it at about 8:30, so I guess the boys will be in their teens before we eat together.

Are you asleep when they boys eat then

We all eat dinner together (at about 6) but I'm not sure if it fosters good habits. My son refuses to use a fork and I'm too busy polishing off my own plate to feed him myself

Fran1 - that's the solution to the dieting issue! No - of course not, I am stuffing my face with bits of peanut butter sandwich and yoghurt!

Gillian76 - I suppose that theory only works if the parents have good eating habits!! My DH is a pig and I can't even eat my dinner with him!!!!

Ds and DH sit at the table in the dining room, dd is in her highchair in the living room with me. It works for us.

How old is your son? does it matter if he doesn't use a fork?

i think the important things are he enjoys sitting at the table, enjoys the social aspect of it, watches you use a knife and fork and so knows for when he is ready, and tastes a good selection of food!

Those of you who have two sittings in your house- do you not feel like you are chained to the kitchen all evening?

The best thing i find about eating together, means kitchen is tidy, dishwasher on by the time dd is in bed, and the rest of the evening i can relax!

We all eat some time between 6.30 and 7 and always have done. There's something very relaxing about it. We quite often go out for dinner at weekends so that tends to be later.

What are "good eating habits", anyway? Whether they use a fork? whether they take their own plate to the kitchen? Whether they eat at all? whether they chew with their mouths open?

We sit down at table for evening meal together every night, the 5yo eats with his hands unless we hound him not to, 3yo turns her nose up and won't touch what's on offer unless it's burgers, the baby throws half of his on the floor.

Am not convinced about this "good eating habits" argument...

Fran1 - I think most of us who have 2 sittings do so at of necessity not choice. My ds is too little to wait for me to get home to have his tea - its simply too late for him at the moment. SO he's fed earlier usually.

Good eating habits are-

Enjoying food - not a battle ground.

Appreciating the time to sit at a table and chat with your family about your day.

IMO does it really matter if a child eats with their hands? Generally my dd uses a spoon and a fork, but if she's struggling i tell her its ok to pick up with her fingers - she now asks me if its ok before i suggest.

Good eating habits mean you can eat in public without cringing with embarrassment at what your child is doing

I'm a recent convert to eating together (last 4 months or so). Ds's are 20 months and 3 and 8 months. 3 days a week we all arrive home shortly before 6pm, the other 2 days me or dh are at home. We aim to eat at 6pm (earlier when possible) which is just about feasible (ds2 doesn't tire as early as ds1 did at his age) but does require quite a bit of advance planning, especially on the days when there are just 10 minutes between getting in and getting tea on the table! We use the oven timer a lot...and have a fairly limited range of stuff we can manage on the days we both work.
I wouldn't go back to eating separately, even though it is sometimes hard work, because its so lovely to be all done for the evening once they are in bed (7.30 at the latest) rather than still ravenous and just starting to get supper on...

Lucky that dh gets back just after 6 so we all eat together then. I do give ds a large afternoon tea at about 3 w. bread and jam, banana etc. to keep him going. Until recently, we quite often had our first course all together, with ds rushing on to his pudding, put him to bed, and then dh and I had pudding and coffee together afterwards as our 'adult' time.

But he's not going to sleep until about 8.30 at the moment so there's plenty of time for us to have pudding together now.

I know that when I was a kid I ate earlier and my promotion to 'grown-up' dinner at 7.30 was a big moment. Think I was about 7 or so.

dd1 (2.9) and dd2 (11months) eat at 5ish, me and dh eat at 7ish when they are in bed.

I have a small plate of whatever the girls are eating at 5ish and make lots of mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm noises to try and get dd1 to eat, with varying degrees of success.

May move our dinner earlier so we all eat together.

Hmmm... isn't not making food a battleground partly about the parents' attitude, too? Could be a battleground with DD, but if she doesn't eat, she doesn't eat. My other problem is that the baby is keener on eating his food if I don't sit with him during meal time (DH feeds him, better if I go eat by myself somewhere else in the house).

FUNNY ENOUGH we are going to a smart pub/restaurant this saturday for a meal for MIL's 60th birthday. There will be 6 children under 6 and I fearfully suspect that this venue to be completely unsuitable (sorry Throck, I couldn't talk them out of it, i know you'll see this, at least you're warned!). The older generation in the family is very proper about meals, but I expect to be outside with the kids most of the time, anyway. I do not expect children under 6 to sit still indoors for 1.5 hours of mealtime. Maybe that's "good eating habits" in somebody else's book, but it's unrealistic in mine.

we all try to eat together in the evening and almost always do so at w/ends. I like to eat a nice dinner sitting at the table.
Dd at 18mnths is already beginning to help set the table for meals. She gets out the mats and puts them on the table then gets into her chair and bangs the table and shouts 'more'.
I get home at about 6 so we sit down for dinner at 6.30. I try to make sure we have everything on the table before sitting down ao that we have no need to get up to get things.
Dss(13) also likes sitting at the table and I find it helps to have this routine as he would otherwise hed be glued to either the computer, xbox or telewhile eating. On Sunday evening he was moaning at dp for having the tele on in the kitchen while we were eating (dp wanted to watch Antiques Roadshow)

Fran 1 - I agree with you on everything you say. Good habits = not cringing.
Queenzebra - yes, 1.5 hrs is a bit unrealistic. Can they get down, after a bit ?
Tarantula - oh, you paint the most beautiful picture - of your dd laying the table - I love it.
I wonder if I could encourage my ds 1 1/2 to do that !!
Last week, he started, taking dh's shoes and socks off, after work. Putting his shoes in cupboard in hall. Putting socks in washing machine.
That kind of thing, I love. It's so sweet.

I am so glad you said that Zeb - I really can't imagine all of ours sitting there for that long as well - particularly not at a posh restaurant. I feel sorry for the other customers !