HV visit after a trip to A&E?

[SheWillBeLoved]

DD (9 months) managed to toss herself off the end of my bed this morning whilst I quickly ran into the bathroom to get my make up bag to get ready for work back in my bedroom. I thought she'd be okay as she was up by the pillows sitting in a V shaped one, and her cot is right next to the bed on the side she was sitting, but she managed to wiggle down to the bottom (in her sleeping bag!) and fall off the side of the bed at the bottom of her cot in the time it took me to go and get the bag.

Cue huge, instant purple bruise, us both screaming, me wanting to vomit, and a trip to A&E. She was fine of course (first proper accident), but they mentioned that anybody under the age of 1 automatically gets a referral to the HV, who will come out and give the parent(s) a talk about 'safety in the home'

Is that all they will do? Will she run around inspecting that me and my home is good enough for DD? As if I don't feel fecking awful enough already, without having to take time off work to sit at home and be lectured.

I'm sure it's all normal and I can see why it's necessary, but in my delicate state I can't help but feel a bit put out by this.

Anyone had one of these visits? Will she slap my wrists?

"TheDevilWearsPrimark
I've had this loads.
To be honest it really annoyed me, it feels like an affront. And of course as I later found if you turn it down they threaten social services.
Do any of us honestly want such involvement from the state? "

I dont suppose Baby P's parent's (for want of a better word) or Khyra Ishaq's parents wanted such involvement either ... Would have made it much harder to torture their children to death And then people could slag the services off for not doing their jobs again and

OP Sorry about your DD and hope she is ok now. Dont take it personally its only to protect children and then wont judge you for it

A good HV should be able to do this in a way that doesn't make you feel judged, more in a kind of checking up that you are both ok now way. Mine was lovely.

As dreamteamgirl says - the guidelines aren't there to make 'good' parents feel bad about their parenting. Hopefully they will just check you and the baby are ok. But it does start the process required if there is a chance that a serious issue is starting to occur. It is only by intervention that there is a chance that some of these ghastly abuse cases can be avoided. In some, very sad instances, intervention was not sufficient.

I got a phone call from the HV following a visit to the emergency eye clinic TBH I thought it was the surgery covering their backs as I'd originally taken ds to the gp who said I should wait a couple of days to see if soreness went by itself and then two hours later phoned me at home sounding edgy and said "on second thoughts can you take him to the emergency eye clinic just in case"

I got a call from HV after a trip to A and E. I think it's a good thing.

Hope your dd is better now.

I had to take DD1 to A&E at four weeks for croup. My HV at the time phoned the following day because she had received a report.

DD was given steroids so we hadn't over reacted. Suspect that in some areas is it standard practice for any visit, not just for suspected abuse.

Yeah it's normal (am a HV) for HVs to do this. DS fell off our bed when he was 5 months - it happens and any HV should understand that.
I usually just check both Mum and baby are okay and that's it. I rarely ever visit unless it's a repeated accident and even then it's just to make sure that accident prevention is in place to prevent a third occurrance. Don't worry about it.

Oh and no - she won't run round your home making sure it's good enough. . Don't feel bad - accidents happen and you learn from them (as I did ).

DreamTeamGirl yes it is a good thing if there is reason.

But after suspected meningitis? Well no I'd rather not have a random woman barge into my home to 'check up' on us.

I was horrified at the size of the file our health visitor has, every bloody movement and words said.

There is no need.

We have been too A&E numerous times as DS1 appears to wish to drive me to an early grave and nobody has ever said anything.

When my much wanted and totally adored ds1 was about 3 months he slipped on a bag and banged his head. In retrospect it was quite a tiny bruise on his head, but it did come up immediately, and being my first, I took him to A&E.

So when I was in there they asked how he had done it - I explained, to be met with "Are you sure it didn't happen when you SLAMMED HIS HEAD AGAINST THE DOOR?" . I was stunned but just calmly repeated the truth. Anyway, they said they were just trying to get the story straight, but I was furious that they would do that, and did call to complain afterwards.

Ever since then I live in fear of my little ones having any accidents and follow them about all day on the off chance they do . Never had a HV come round though.

my Hv is good, and knows when to contact me. ie if allergy related, she knows i will be fine unless huge reaction. and i will often pop down the clinic for a chat and update

if breathing related she phones and checks that i'm ok with the girls new bouts of illnesses.

if an accident, then again will call round or phone.

Ds had numerous visits to OOH and a couple to A&E (one by ambulance). Never received a call from the HV.

Everytime a baby or young child dies through neglect or worse, everyone shouts out loud about health care professionals not doing their jobs properly. Think Victoria Climbe and Baby P.
But when they do follow proceedures, people are 'affronted'.
I think a child's life is worth more than anybody's feelings being hurt.

I would add that had I received any interest at all from the HV service in our area I would have viewed it as positive. However where we live they are singularly awful - didn't even return calls.

My ds aged 3 had his first seizure last august ( he has recently been diagnosed with epilepsy) my HV phoned me to ask if I needed any support...OMG she was amazing, she got him refered by the gp to the neurologist etc, after 3 seizures they finally took notice...I dont understand why people get defensive..accidents happen especially in the real world of being a mum..working, cleaning, seeing to other kids etc...I cried the other week to my HV as I have another son with severe adhd and he was driving me nuts, she just happened to phone and i was in floods of tears, she asked if I wanted a home visit, I replied I will be ok and she was incredibly understanding.

Everyone in A&E understands that accidents happen and that parents feel awful when they do. No one wants to make the guilt worse. But DevilwearsPrimark you are being incredibly naive if you think it's easy to tell what is an accident and what is abuse. If it were easy, there wouldn't be any Victoria Climbies. A sad lesson that has been learnt again and again is that children like Victoria and the Wests' kids went to A&E multiple times but no one joined the dots.

It's not just about abuse either. Repeated hospital visits can be a sign of a parent who is struggling with a child's medical or other needs. It may be very difficult for that parent to ask for help directly because of the stigma attached to "failing" as a mother or father.

For all those reasons, HVs follow up A&E attendances. It is about protecting children and supporting parents.

Well my DS fell off the bed on Thursday , almost same as you. I cried more than him and still feel guilty even now. The dr checked him over, sent us home but never mentioned about the HV coming or being informed. No phone calls or visit on friday.

ds (2.6) broke his collarbone a couple of weeks ago, which meant a visit to A+E. HV phoned last Friday just to check he was ok. I admit I felt a little bit "Oh my God- tey think I am a bad parent!" at first, but she was very nice about it, and I soon realised they are just doing their job, and actually I am glad that they are!

just had a visit from health visitor after my two year old fell back on concrete in garden and took a nasty bump to the head, i have been to A&E once before, when he was one after he climbed out of pram and bumped head. I was mortified as she arrived unannounced a week after it happened. I have a four year old who has never had an accident but my wee boy is more accident prone, have been left feeling that i am bein kept an eye on and terrified that my son has another accident incase they think he is neglected or somthing! :(

I got a visit when DS1 was 4 because he had constant ear infections and tonsilitis. They wanted to check he was "ok" I have to admit to being a bit . It wasn't as if I could have stopped either happening!

Realise this is an old thread but would have been very grateful of HV call when DS was poorly with bronchiolitis and severe chest infection at 5mths. Back and forward to crap poor A & E (no childrens wards at that hosptal, Xmas week so limited staff).

With an accident I would have felt a little different but as already pointed out they have a job to do.

ellie, and others. its normal for any admission to a+e to be sent onto the HV. mine usually call me to chat (dd4 was in and out a lot as a young baby), or pop round.

TheDevilWearsPrimark
I've had this loads.
To be honest it really annoyed me, it feels like an affront. And of course as I later found if you turn it down they threaten social services.
Do any of us honestly want such involvement from the state? "

"I dont suppose Baby P's parent's (for want of a better word) or Khyra Ishaq's parents wanted such involvement either ... Would have made it much harder to torture their children to death hmm And then people could slag the services off for not doing their jobs again hmm and angry".

Didn't do any good did they? Perhaps if they did their job properly and stopped haressing normal parents, then people wouldn't be so annoyed by them interfering.