how do you know when to start giving finger foods and mashed instead of pureed??

[monsterkeeper]

i can honestly say i hate this weaning business!!!no-one helps.my HV is pure rubbish and my family dont really know what to say to help.(except my inlaws-which are more than happy to tell me what im doing wrong and how dh's ex did this and this and this with their dd!!!)i never know if im giving the right amount and variation and should i be mashing my ds food now?when i mentioned to dh about trying his with baby carrott to see if he's ready his reply was "who comes up with this crap he'll choke"
i am a first time mum desperately need 2 chill out i know but find myself awake at night thinking bout his food and what to give him. he's 28weeks and have been giving him solids since 16weeks so were well into established feeding.also have just cut out his anoon bottle and giving him lunch. here's a typical day:
830- porridge and 9oz milk
12-chicken dinner pureed & 8oz
1600-spag bol pureed&yog or fruit puree
1900-9oz milk

any advice please im desperate! (though now ive written this out i feel a bit better)

He doesn't need pureed really. Lots of people go straight to mashed and finger food now because they wean at 6 months. When the majority of people were weaning at 12-16 weeks then pureed makes more sense. At 6 months he could join in with most normal family meals (as long as not too salty) either feeding himself if its stuff that he can hold of being spoon fed mashed food.

you can give him finger foods from now

steamed sticks of carrot, brocolli etc

pieces of pear, banana and avocado are also good

breadsticks dipped in humous is good

toast fingers for breakfast with cereal

he can have mashed food as well from now

i started to wean DD at 24 weeks and gave her whole and mashed food from the start (not really doing purees or if i do i bulk them out with cous cous or pasta)

perhaps your DP is confusing choking with the gag reflex? DD gags and spits things out which she can't handle and this isn't choking

your Ds could have the spag bol cut up and he can self feed or you can do it

go for it!

16 weeks was quite early to start!

If he can sit up unaided and grab food he should be fine with finger foods. Try toast, rice cakes, vegetable sticks (so he can hold them) cooked so they're soft, soft fruit like pears, mango, avocado. Avoid nuts and whole round things like grapes or blueberries.

thanks for the quick replies!toast fingers?really?gosh i really dont think i can do it which i know sounds ridiculous!is it normal to feel so aprehensive bout it?

yes it's normal, especially if you're more used to pureeing food for babies.

he's now over 6 months so can have pretty much anything you're having. avoid overly processed foods which may be high in salt and general crap. but normal home cooking is fine. spag bol doesn't even need chopping up really, he'll have lots of fun with the long strands!

just be prepared for a lot of mess, and some gagging

Tbh at first he will probably just gum and suck food rather than swallowing it, so you'll have some time to adjust. Maybe if finger foods seem like too much of a leap you could start with just making his food lumpier?

Try not to leave it too long though or he'll get reliant on eating purees which he can suck off the spoon, and won't learn to chew food.

thank you everyone!i was extremely brave this morning and gave my ds some toast which he just sort of mashed up in his hands, sucked on a bit and chewed like he was eating chewing gum!!feel like we've made a break through!thanks again.

I know how you feel. DD is 8 months but hasn't really 'got' weaning. She's only just started swallowing pureed food, however I do give her finger foods to chew on too. Rice cakes with Philli, long chunky sticks of cucumber etc. A mix of puree and whole food seems to work for us.