Feeling really broody!

[Marne]

Feeling really broody, my friend is due to give birth in a month and seeing her today made me feel even more broody, i loved being pg and i would love another child, i have 2 lovely dd's and i have always wanted to try once more for a boy (i wouldn't be upset if it was a girl).

The only problem is my 2 dd's both have Autism (high functioning) and i have been told there is a 60% chance of the next child being on the autistic spectrum. I would not change my girls for the world, they are great (different but great), both of them have been through a lot (diagnosis, appointments, speech therapy etc). Dd1 is at main stream school and should do well (maybe even go to uni one day), dd2 struggles a lot more, she has poor speech and sensory problems but is improving each day.

I feel i am being selfish even considering bringing another child with ASD into the world but there is also a 40% chance that the child will not have ASD. If the child does have ASD there is no saying how severe it could be and the spectrum is so huge.

Would it be selfish to have another? should i just except that i won't have any more?

Hi

Firstly it's so normal to feel broody! I am just the same, many of my family members are pregnant and I feel so jealous! I miss all that excitement and expectation you have when pregnant and there is nothing better than having a baby!

I too havea few issues around whetehr or not to have another due to health reasons.

I think at the end of teh day you have to do what YOU and your family want. Ignore comments from other people, don't feel guilty because others make you feel that way, just do what you want. So long as the baby you have will be loved and cherished and the children you already have will adjust to the new set up then that is your main concern. It's about whether you feel that you can do it and can cope.

Have you spoken to your OH about it? My husband and I have been discussing about trying again and it has helped a bit to get my feelings about it out in the open.

Feel free to message me to talk more if you like. x

Dh's main worry is :what will other people think?" . We have been talking about it on and off for 2 years and dh keeps changing his mind.

I'm sure the dd's would be fine with a little brother or sister, dd1 is great with babies and dd2 doesn't really take much notice. In a way it would feel odd having a NT child (not on the spectrum) because autism seems to be our life and its totally normal to us.

A part of the broodyness is the excitement of having a newborn baby and all the nice bits that come with it, a part of it is because i would love a son but i have also always wanted to have a large family.

I just feel its such a big decision to make (mainly for dh). I just wish we could see into the future and know what the dd's will be like in a few years (will they be coping with the ASD) and would we cope with another ASD child which could be more severe than the dd's?