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Midwifery course deferred - So happy and awaiting our baby's imminent arrival!

28 replies

SweetFudge · 25/07/2005 19:02

Thought I'd start a new thread to reach everyone who replied and were honest and supportive to my "dilemma" thread in June - "Baby due in late August. Course in September. Do I go ahead with midwifery?"

The head of my uni's midwifery curriculum called earlier - Turns out that the admissions tutor who refused my deferral request had okayed it with the curriculum head briefly. But the head explained to me that she had only really realised how near my due date was to the course start date today when she reviewed the papers for this year's intake.

We talked for a long time and I reiterated that I am fully committed to becoming a midwife. Just needed to spend this year with my baby and get used to being a new mother!

So I am now officially deferred to starting in Sept 2006 and am feeling over the moon.

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Flossam · 25/07/2005 19:09

Oh, thats lovely. It would have undoubtably been too much for you. Glad they have seen sense. Good luck for the birth - I'm sure it will make you an even better midwife, so you will be well worth the wait for them!

bee3 · 25/07/2005 19:32

Didn't follow your earlier thread, but just wanted to say congratulations! We need all the committed midwives we can get, and I'm so glad for you that you get this time with your baby and the chance to train at a later date - brilliant. Good luck with your imminent arrival and take care.

snafu · 25/07/2005 19:51

Oh, SF - yay!

I am really chuffed for you. So glad it's all worked out for what I am sure is the best. What a weight off - now you can get on and enjoy that precious first year and look forward to 2006 without all that pressure.

Congratulations again and good luck!

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moondog · 25/07/2005 19:54

Fantastic news sweetfudge-I contributed to your thread. (Told you to enjoy your own baby first)

Not long to go now!
Ooooh all excited for you!

XXXX

vickiyumyum · 25/07/2005 20:00

well done, glad its all worked out for you. september 2006, thats the time i qualify! if you want any help or i might have a load of books to sell by then, when you get your reading list, let me know.

good luck with the baby!

SweetFudge · 26/07/2005 00:23

Thanks very much, everyone! Your support and advice has really meant a lot to me.

About four weeks to go before baby's arrival now. DH and I can't stop smiling today! For the first time since January (when I was refused the deferral), I can really look forward to baby's birth without feeling very angry with myself for wanting to do the course and knowing how unfair it would be on our baby. I'm going to keep in touch with everyone on the Student Parents threads and keep checking how all of you are getting on.

Vicki - Definitely will be looking up on advice from all of you starting and qualifying before me! And the books after you're done with them next year will be a good way to start.

I want to dance around the room but can only manage a few Telly Tubby bum wriggles.

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mears · 26/07/2005 00:31

Brilliant news

SweetFudge · 26/07/2005 00:43

Thank you, Mears! Aiming for waterbirth and going to just enjoy our long awaited baby.

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vickiyumyum · 26/07/2005 08:12

its so exciting isn't it to know that you are about to emabrk on a greta career and to being doing something for yourself.

i hope that you will enjoy it as much as i have!

Toothache · 26/07/2005 08:40

Sweetfudge - Thats fab news!!

I might be wrong, but are you the MN'er who was undergoing fertility treatment?

SweetFudge · 26/07/2005 12:14

Spot on with what you said, Vicky - I feel strongly that midwifery is my true calling and at the same time, was getting more and more frustrated with the dilemma facing us. As baby's due date had come closer, I was becoming more tense and unhappy because it meant I'd have to decide sooner or later.

Thank you, Toothache and you have a good memory!Yes, I'd been the MN-er undergoing fertility treatment. Well, self administered anyway..DH zooming around London with our donor's little troppers and finally getting it right in November '04. The month we succeeded was when I tried a MN conception tip for women with severely retroverted uteruses i.e. lie on your front to do the deed and stay in that position for half an hour. Amazing that our wonderful baby resulted from this.

So, that is why it has been so frustrating. The University were told that we were undergoing fertility treatment and they were supportive about a maternity deferral at the time.

Still, over and done with. I am now going to sit in the nursery and just keep beaming to myself and singing to our baby in my tum. I know how soppy that sounds.

SF

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starlover · 26/07/2005 12:17

that's fab news. wish i could defer mine

supposed to start this september, but it's not gonna happne

Toothache · 26/07/2005 12:18

Ah Sweetfudge - I remember that now! I checked and checked after that night to see if you got a BFP but never found the thread again. SOOOOO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! Congratulations.

SweetFudge · 26/07/2005 14:26

Starlover,

I'm very sorry that you've had to choose like that. I know what a wretched decision it is to make and you are much the braver soul to have decided before September. I decided that I would only make the decision once baby was born and much as I told myself I would still try to start the course, I knew I wouldn't.

Just kept picturing myself looking at baby and thinking "Nope, can't do this to you when you've only just come into our lives"

I gather then that Surrey are not going to budge on your deferral request? Would you re-apply a year later when your ds is older?

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vickiyumyum · 26/07/2005 14:33

which uni are you going to be going to, sweet fudge?

SweetFudge · 26/07/2005 15:04

Toothache, sorry about not updating on the conception thread. We'd tested on Christmas day and getting the BFP was quite surreal. Also, we'd decided that the November '04 inseminations would be the last ones we'd do. I know there are many couples who have continued fertility treatment and have had to sadly endure more miscarriages than we have over our three years of trying.

But for us, it was time to stop. It was taking over our lives and our relationship. We didn't think the November ones worked either - Our donor wasn't available on the days we needed him.

For want of a better word, the BFP seemed unbelieveable. Precious and fragile. So, to announce the pregnancy felt like over-confidence in its success on my part. Hope I make sense.

An emotional roller coaster with the midwifery deferral debacle thrown in for good measure!

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SweetFudge · 26/07/2005 15:06

Middlesex, Vicky. Which uni are you finishing at next year?

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SweetFudge · 26/07/2005 15:07

Vicki, not Vicky.

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Toothache · 26/07/2005 15:14

SF - I remember you saying it was your last attempt and I remember feeling how sad you were. Absolutely NO NEED to apologise! Well done and Congrats again. Good luck with everything and look forward to seeing the birth announcement of this wee miracle!!!!

Suggestions for thread title:

"Sweetfudge is now even Sweeter!"

starlover · 26/07/2005 16:04

hi sweetfudge

i keep ringing the uni to try and get an appt to go in and talk to someone but just get answerphone the whole time and no-one ever rings me back!

so, yep, gonna re-apply some time in the future!

oatcake · 26/07/2005 16:07

Vicki and I are at TVU. Slough.

I thought that this was where you were going? But there again, I can only vaguely remember you other posting.

Many congrats. I'm sure you've made the right decision to defer for a year.

vickiyumyum · 26/07/2005 17:29

as otacake said. tvu in slough. the work itself is great, but the uni not so good!
so middlesex is probably a much wiser choice.

ScrewballMuppet · 26/07/2005 19:47

Thats fantastic news!! Sweetfudge

SweetFudge · 26/07/2005 21:55

Cheers, ScrewballMuppet! How are you getting on with the websites? Also, I don't reckon that it will affect your little ones too much to have the two childminders because it will still be the two same individuals they see every day.

I hope Middlesex will be okay, Vicki. Glad you're liking the work at TVU. How many catches have you got left to do?

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vickiyumyum · 27/07/2005 18:09

i've only got 11 so far so am going to ahve to do an intensive period on delivery suite to get up to 40 by the end of next year!
although i did 5 weeks of nights on delivery suite and only 'got' 1 'normal' delivery the rest were sections, ventouse or just didn't deliver on my shift!
met some lovely women and their partners too. spent many nights discussing the pros and cons of house of fraser v john lewis and clarins v clinique!!!!

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