DS refusing to wear night nappies but still wets the bed

[roseability]

My DS will be 4 next month. In the last couple of weeks he has refused to put his night nappy on and gets upset when I have tried to persuade him to wear one. So I have let him take the lead and not forced him to wear one. However he still wets the bed. Mostly it is just in the morning when he gets up, however some nights it is in the middle of the night as well

A couple of nights ago I lifted him when I went to bed and he did a wee in the toilet. He then did get up in the morning and use the toilet. Naturally we praised him and he was really pleased with himself. However I tried the same last night and he didn't need to go, he then flooded the bed this morning. I have never got cross when he wets the bed and don't make any kind of deal about it. However I got the sense he was disappointed in himself.

I just don't know how to go forward. My hunch is he is not ready as his nappies were still wet in the morning. It was his refusal to wear them that sprung me, I would have been happy to let him stay in night nappies for as long as he needed.

Any advice? I find it hard to cope with the laundry to be honest as we only have a small house. I don't want wetting the bed to become an issue for him. Help!

My stepson is now 13 and still wets the bed, His mother kept him in anppies/pull ups until he was about 8 and I don't think this really helped, as although DSS does have a recognised medical problem, (nocturnal enuresis) he has admitted in the past that he is sometimes aare he is wetting th ebed and he just doesn't care as he can't be bothered ot get up. I think his attitude was probably compounded by the facts that he wore nappies for so long, so didn't have to get up to toilet and hat he has never been made responsible for his bed wetting and always told he can't help it. Of course he can't really help it, but that doesn't mean he can't try and do something about it.

At 4 your son is still very young, so he has plenty of time and the medical profession wouldn't see him until about aged 7. However, if he doesn't want to wear nappies, and obviously understands, I would be inclined to allow him to go nappyless and then mabe lift him when you go to bed (he needs to be fully awake if you do this) and then maybe set an alarm for early so you can get him up again.

You can get bed wetting alarms which clip to the pants and then go off when the child starts to wet, so the child starts to learn to wake up when their bladde ris full, but I am not sure these are intended for such young children.

I think in general, just don't worry too much about it for now.

Thanks midori - we are just going to take it night by night and if he wants to go to bed without a nappy we will just let him. I am going to try and get him to go to the toilet when we go to bed. I am not concerned and to be honest expected him to be in night nappies for a while yet. However if he does not want to wear one, I am not going to force him or upset him. He is showing signs of being ready. He does wake up when he is going, he just doesn't often wake up soon enough to get to the toilet. However at least he is not sleeping right through wetting the bed and not noticing at all. I think he will get it with time and patience

What kind of nappies are you using?

We used pull-ups and always called them "bedtime pants" which seemed to be OK as far as DS2 was concerned, when he wouldn't wear nappies.

He was like your DD,almost ready, but not quite getting there in time and the fact that accidents didn't "matter" made life less stressful for everyone

My ds 4 is the same and says every night "don't put a nappy on". He goes to the toilet at bed time, I then take him to the toilet as I go to bed, and put a nappy on him then, (pull ups were too fiddly) He is still half asleep and doesn't notice until the morning when I just say "oh never mind".

katiep - I thought about putting one on when he is asleep. I might try that

we use pull ups lisbey. I just think he dislikes the sensation of weeing in them now, it feels wrong but he just can't wake up in time to get to the toilet. Bless him, he pads through in the morning and says ' mummy I just did have a wee dribble in the bed' - I have to laugh inwardly when a wee dribble is actually a flood that has soaked everything. It is not bothering me too much at the moment but the laundry might get me down after a while

LOL rose, my DS1 had occasional (2-3 times a year) accidents when he was unwell for several years, but would always insist he had "sweaty" PJs in the mornings

My DS is still having wetting accidents lots of nights - can recommend bedmats. Drynights do bed mats as well as pull ups for a similar price. Failing that you can buy mattress protectors which might save the mattress a bit.

My DS is nearly 4 and still wearing nappies in bed. Even if I lift him they are still wet so I conclude he is not ready to be night time trained yet.

I would try and take him before you go to bed. If he won't go then put a nappy on him in his sleep?

Agree nappies easier than pull ups for this. I stand DS beside the toilet and run the bathroom taps, if no wee I flush the toilet....he usually goes.

We also have bedmats under the sheet - to protect mattress incase he has daytime sleep or something.