Gone dummy cold turkey tonight, need hand holding!!

[melsy]

Im hearing - "I dont want to suck my thumb" (dd16.6yrs suggested it this evening to her) over and over from upstairs.

Weve been counting down to tonight for the last 10days in preparation with dd2 3.6 yrs.

Dummys are in a pretty bag at front door for fairies & a Robot has been requested.

She asked about 5 times during bed time reading when the fairies were coming. Normally she has dummy in and gets much more chilled at this time , but she was a tad frenetic & wouldnt sit still. I put her in bed and she asked 3 times that shed like her dummy.

This is quite a challenge for me as Ive been seriously unwell since last yr and Im having a really difficult day with my own symptoms.

since Ive been writing this her calling has escalated into crying her eyes out and my stress levels are rocketing.

Shes now come into the hall at the top , something she never normally does.

bed times are normally SO EASY

help me not crack

Shall I cut all the teats so I cant give in???

Dh has just put her in bed and hes come down and says its heartbreaking.

I feel rotten that shes not all soothed and relaxed.

oohh nooo what do I do

Yay, well done Melsy

Let us know how you get on tomorrow.

Thank you guys, she normally sleeps through , so Im hoping she doesnt wake up in a tizzy at night and call for it. Its possible she just pops it back in normally at night and we dont even know , eeeeeeeeeeeek.

lets hope she learns that she can still relax and calm and go to sleep withought it.

Thank you FernieB for chipping in , Ive got some bigger issues with her and behaviour and she does need to know she cant scream and shout in temper or tears at me or anyone to get things.

Im there for my children when its very much needed ; I sit,lay, hold and soothe all night when unwell no question.

This however is a VERY different issue.

i wasn't implying anything melsy, i was replying to the post by fernie, who believes that if you "give in" to her she will learn that screaming gets her anything

i suggested that maybe she would not learn that, but that when she was distressed, that you would help her

you said you in your op that you were stressed, you needed hand-holding, you felt rotten that she wasn't soothed and that your dh described it as heartbreaking.
it seemed plausible to me that you didn't necessarily think that what you were oding was the "right" thing, and so I gave my opinion, which is that I would let her have the dummy

a 3.6 yr old is, IMO, too young to fully comprehend the whole "if you do this you get a treat" thing. and even if they have agreed to something, then when it comes to it and they decide that actually they aren't ready for it, they certainly are not old enough to be able to say "oh well, i made the decision, better stick to it"

your daughter was understandably very upset, and i don't htink that reviewing it and deciding to give the dummy back would have been teaching her to scream for her own way. she wasn't tantrumming, she was upset because her source of comfort for the past 3 and a half years had suddenly gone

Oh dear, we are attempting this scenario this weekend! have been priming her all week that the dummy fairy will come remove her dummies and leave a present. I am really worried as she is such a good sleeper now just the thought of her reverting to how she was and having to get up in the night to deal with dummy issues is a nightmare. Don't want to upset the apple cart but has to be done I guess!